《柯南脫口秀》第24期:安全是第一要?jiǎng)?wù)
Thank you.Thank you very much.I live in new york.I got gresh haircut.New york. 謝謝 非常感謝 我住在紐約 剛剪了個(gè)頭發(fā) 紐約
Fresh haircut before the show,before I left. 上節(jié)目前剪了個(gè)頭發(fā) 我離開(kāi)之前
I said to the barber,somewhere between a new wedding D.J and department of homeland security. 我跟理發(fā)師說(shuō) 介于新澤西州婚禮DJ 和國(guó)土安全部官員的發(fā)型
I'll be honest with you.He nailed it.He did a great job. 我說(shuō)實(shí)話 他搞定了他做得很好
So I want you to be entertained but I want you to feel safe. 我想讓你們開(kāi)心 也想讓你們安全
Safety is my up here. 安全是我的第一要?jiǎng)?wù)
As a volunteer firefighter,I see a lot of things that are unsafe in society. 作為一個(gè)志愿消防隊(duì)員 我在社會(huì)上看到了很多不安全的事
I see this father walking around with a baby in attached to the front of his body, 我看著一位父親走來(lái)走去 他的身前掛著一個(gè)育兒袋
which is so cocky.which says,look,I get women pregnant,I make them have the baby,then I wear the women as . 這太炫耀了 意思是 瞧 我讓女人懷孕了 我讓她生下孩子 我把孩子當(dāng)首飾一樣戴
I say sir,please remove the baby.That's not safe.I'm a volunteer firefighter. 我說(shuō)先生 請(qǐng)放下孩子 這不安全 我是志愿消防隊(duì)員
You know,he said to me,I'm an actual firefighter.why don't you get out of my face? 他對(duì)我說(shuō) 我是個(gè)真正的消防隊(duì)員 你別煩我了行嗎
I said maybe you don't hear what I said,bro.volunteer firefighter. 我說(shuō)也許你沒(méi)聽(tīng)到我說(shuō)的話 哥們 志愿消防隊(duì)員
That means I could do your entire job in my spare time.Thank you. 那就是說(shuō)我業(yè)余時(shí)間里 能做你的所有工作 謝謝
Then I stopped,dropped and rolled my way out of the conversation. 然后我停了下來(lái) 不再跟他繼續(xù)交談
Proving that I'm a volunteer firefighter. 證明我是個(gè)志愿消防隊(duì)員
I fly a lot.I don't mind if it's first class on the plane. 我經(jīng)常坐飛機(jī) 我不介意坐的是不是頭等艙
I don't want to have to walk through it to get to my seat.I sit in zone three. 我不想走過(guò)頭等艙 才能到達(dá)我的位置 因?yàn)槲易诘谌齾^(qū)
And when I walk through first class,I see a lot of things that make me angry. 我走過(guò)頭等艙時(shí) 我看到了很多 讓我憤怒的事情
They have a lot of extra leg room.eating a five course meal. 他們的腿部空間大得多 吃著五道菜的正餐
Drinking mimosas.I'm not on the plane yet.That's disrespect. 喝著含羞草酒 我還沒(méi)上飛機(jī)呢 這很不尊重
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