第一,為自己喝彩。很多自卑的人無法做到為自己喝彩。就算他們做成了一件很棒的事,他們還是會傾向于盯著那些自己沒做好的事。就算是對于最積極主動的人來說,這也是個大難題。試想,你在一個項目上花了好幾個月的時間,你傾注了你的心血和靈魂,然而,當(dāng)項目完成時,你卻不愿意讓任何人看見它。你雖然很在乎自己做的事情,但還是會感到尷尬,可能你會將自己與行業(yè)內(nèi)的其他人作對比,這讓你自卑。也許你非常有天分,也壯志滿滿,但你缺乏實現(xiàn)目標(biāo)的自信。要想克服這個困難,你就要學(xué)會為自己喝彩。當(dāng)自己達(dá)成了一個目標(biāo)時,花些時間來回顧自己付出的努力。幾個月之前,可能你完全沒有想過自己會實現(xiàn)它,但你做到了。大多數(shù)人做不到,而你做到了,所以你要感到自豪。只要為自己稍加喝彩,你就能走出過度反思和完美主義的怪圈。有時候,你需要一點樂趣來認(rèn)識到自己應(yīng)該多自豪。
Number 2: Learn something new. How often do you try new things? Do you like to learn or do you just stick to what you're good at? People with low self-confidence tend to hide within their comfort zone. They rarely take risks because they don't believe in their ability to succeed. But your comfort zone might be the reason you're lacking confidence. Learning a news kill gives you a sense of accomplishment and purpose. When you overcome an unfamiliar challenge, you gain a very different kind of pride, which will stick with you for years to come. It's so powerful, because nine times out of ten you expect yourself to go down in flames, but by succeeding it's something new. You develop faith in yourself. This belief will give you the confidence to keep pushing even when you fail. And who knows you might just discover a new passion along the way.
第二,學(xué)習(xí)新事物。你多久嘗試一次新事物呢?你喜歡學(xué)習(xí),還是喜歡只做哪些自己擅長的事?不夠自信的人傾向于躲在自己的舒適區(qū)里。他們很少冒險,因為他們不相信自己能成功。然而,你的舒適區(qū)可能正是你缺乏自信的原因。學(xué)習(xí)新技能會給你帶來成就感、使命感。當(dāng)你克服了一個陌生的挑戰(zhàn)時,你會獲得一種不一樣的自豪感,它會伴隨你很多年。這種感覺是很強大的,因為以往你總認(rèn)為自己會把事情搞砸,然而,在你成功之后,新的改變發(fā)生了。你對自己有了信心。它給了你就算跌倒也能站起、繼續(xù)向前的自信。說不定,在這個過程中,你會發(fā)現(xiàn)一份新的熱忱。
Number 3: Smell great. Smell is easily the most underrated of our senses. Most people don't realize the mental and physical role that smell plays in their lives. Your sense of smell can, for example, completely change your mood. One smell might make you excited while another leaves you scared or angry. We even link certain smells to memorable times in our lives. Say your mom used to make brownies when you were younger. When that familiar smell hits your limbic system, those nostalgic memories can come rushing back. All of the sudden you feel warm and safe while reminiscing about your childhood home. Because your sense of smell is so powerful you can use it to boost your confidence. A 2009 study from the University of Liverpool discovered that different smells affect both self-confidence and self-esteem. Researchers gave a sample of male participants two different types of deodorants. The next day they assessed each groups self-confidence. They found that the men with better deodorant had a much more positive self-image. Now the best part about this technique is how easy it is. By caring just a little more about your scent you can give yourself a quick and easy boost of confidence.
第三,讓自己聞起來很棒。嗅覺是我們的感官中最容易被低估的一個。多數(shù)人沒有意識到生活中嗅覺對心理和生理的影響。比如,你的嗅覺可以完全改變你的情緒。一種氣味可能會讓你興奮,而另一種氣味使你害怕或生氣。我們甚至?xí)涯承馕逗腿松兄档眉o(jì)念的時刻聯(lián)系起來。比如說,在你小時候時候,媽媽曾經(jīng)做過布朗尼蛋糕。當(dāng)那熟悉的香味向你襲來,那些懷舊的記憶可能就會涌上心頭。剎那間,你感到溫暖、安心,同時回憶起童年的家。你的嗅覺非常強大,大到你可以用它來增強自信。利物浦大學(xué)2009年的一項研究發(fā)現(xiàn),不同的氣味會影響自信心和自尊心。研究人員給一個樣本內(nèi)的男性被試兩種不同的體香劑。第二天,他們評估了每組被試的自信心。他們發(fā)現(xiàn),使用更好的體香劑的男性擁有更積極的自我形象。這個技巧最棒的地方在于容易操作。通過多些留意自己的氣味,你就能輕松地快速提升自信。
Number 4: Watch less TV. Watching too much TV cripples your confidence by lowering your self-esteem. In fact, one study found that the number of hours you spend watching TV directly influences yourself-worth and it doesn't matter what show you're watching, whether it's reality TV dramas or sitcoms, too much TV is a confidence killer. Why? Because too much TV lowers motivation. People who watch tons of TV are less likely to exercise and maintain long-term goals. It can even worsen cognitive skills like concentration and memory. So instead of binging another series on Netflix, limit yourself to an hour of TV a day. You'll start feeling more clear-headed and confident in no time
第四,少看電視??措娨曁鄷魅跄愕淖孕牛驗槟愕淖宰鹦臅档?。事實上,一個研究發(fā)現(xiàn),你在看電視上花的時間直接影響你的自我效能感,這跟你看電視的內(nèi)容完全無關(guān),無論它是真人秀、電視劇,還是情景喜劇,看電視太多就會扼殺你的自信。為什么?因為看電視太多會減弱你做事情的動力。那些成天看電視劇的人運動得更少,也無法維持長期目標(biāo)。它甚至?xí)魅跄愕恼J(rèn)知能力,比如專注力和記憶力。因此,不要在Netflix上瘋狂看劇,而是將看電視的時間限制在每日一小時。很快你就會感到頭腦更清醒、更自信。
Number 5: Playing music. The most powerful aspect of music isn't the music itself. It's the emotion a musician infuses into every note. It's the ability to express complex feelings through layers of sound. Many people who lack confidence also struggle to express themselves. They don't value their emotions or they might belittle their own ideas. When opportunities arise, they give way to the people around them. It might feel like everyone else's opinions matter more than yours. By playing an instrument you learn to recognize your own worth. You become more in touch with your emotions. You gain the ability to express them in a way words never could. As you begin to understand yourself, you develop two vital pieces of confidence: self-respect and self-esteem. A recent study which took place over three years had 250 teenagers undergo either musical or non-musical therapy. They found that musical therapy improved self-esteem and confidence more than any other type of treatment. But why did music work so well? Playing an instrument lets you be vulnerable. You may not know why you're frustrated or scared but you can channel those feelings into the music you make. Over time you'll start to overcome the negativity that's been holding you back.
第五,彈奏音樂。音樂最強大之處并不在于其本身,而是在于音樂家注入每一個音符的情感。它是通過層層聲音來表達(dá)復(fù)雜情感的能力。許多缺乏自信的人也很難表達(dá)自己的感受。他們不重視自己的情緒,他們貶低自己的想法。機會來臨時,他們會將它們拱手讓給周圍的人。好像周圍所有人的想法都比你的重要。通過演奏樂器,你會意識到自己的價值所在。你與自己的情緒產(chǎn)生了更多的互動。你能夠用言語無法形容的方式表達(dá)它們。當(dāng)你開始了解自己時,你會培養(yǎng)兩種重要的自信:自重和自尊。在最近一項為期三年的研究中,有250名青少年接受了音樂治療或非音樂治療。研究者發(fā)現(xiàn),音樂療法比其他任何類型的治療都更能提高自尊和自信。但是,為什么音樂的效果這么好?演奏樂器會讓你脆弱,你可能你不知道自己為什么感到沮喪或害怕,但是,你可以把這些感受融入你演奏的音樂中。久而久之,你會開始克服一直以來拖累你的消極情緒。
Number 6: Exercise daily. Daily exercise can skyrocket yourself-confidence by affecting everything from your physical health to your sense of well-being. To put it simply when you look good you feel good. Daily exercise helps you meet your fitness goals which in turn strengthens your body and fills it with energy. After a good workout you'll feel mentally and physically capable like you can conquer anything. This natural euphoria is what's called an exercise or runner's high. When you experience physical stress, your brain releases natural painkillers called endorphins. These chemicals improve your mood and self-esteem. If you're having a bad morning as little as 15 minutes of exercise can completely turn your day around. You'll be more motivated to tackle new challenges. You'll feel more courageous in the face of adversity. Your brain will even feel more focused and efficient. You've probably heard about the benefits of exercise many times but it's for good reason. There are a few things that simultaneously strengthen your body sharpen your mind and help you accomplish your goals. And all you need to sacrifice is half an hour of your day. So if you want to develop self-confidence make working out a part of your daily routine.
第六,每日運動。每日運動能極大地提高你的自信,因為運動能影響你的生理健康和幸福感。簡單來說,你看起來很棒,你就會感覺很棒。每日運動可以幫你達(dá)到健康目標(biāo),從而增強你的體質(zhì),使身體充滿能量。在一次鍛煉之后,你會在心理上和生理上都感到充滿能量,就像自己能夠百戰(zhàn)百勝一樣。這種自然的興奮,就是所謂的運動高潮或跑步者高潮。當(dāng)你在生理上有壓力時,大腦會釋放出一種叫做內(nèi)啡肽的天然止痛劑。這些化學(xué)物質(zhì)可以改善你的情緒,提升自尊。如果你上午過得很糟糕,只需15分鐘的運動就可以完全改變這一天。你會更有動力去應(yīng)對新的挑戰(zhàn)。面對逆境,你會感到更勇敢。你的大腦甚至?xí)鼘W?、效率更高。運動的好處,你可能已經(jīng)聽膩了,但它是的理由是充分的。有些事情可以在增強體質(zhì)的同時使你的思維更加敏銳,并幫助你實現(xiàn)目標(biāo)。而你需要付出的,僅僅是每天半小時。因此,如果你想培養(yǎng)自信,你就要讓鍛煉成為日常生活的一部分。