Nelson mandela is a particularly special case study in the leadership world, because he is universally regarded as a great leader, you can take other personalities and depending on the nation you go to, we have different opinions about other personalities, but Nelson Mandela across the world is universally regarded as a great leader.
He was actually the son of a tribal chief, and he was asked one day, how did you learn to be a great leader? And he responded that he would go with his father to tribal meetings. And he remembers two things when his father would meet with other elders. One, they would always sit in a circle and two, his father was always the last to speak.
You will be told your whole life that you need to learn to listen, I would say that you need to learn to be the last to speak. I See it in boardrooms every day of the week, even people who consider themselves Good leaders, who may actually be decent leaders, will walk into a room and say here's the problem, here's what I think, but I'm interested in your opinion, let's go around the room. It's too late.
The skill to hold your opinions to yourself until everyone has spoken does two things, one, it gives everybody else the feeling that they have been heard, it gives everyone else the ability to feel that they have contributed. And two, you get the benefit of hearing what everybody else has to think before you render your opinion. The skill is really to keep your opinions to yourself, if you agree with somebody don't nod YES, if you disagree with somebody don't nod NO.
Simply sit there take it all in and the only thing you're allowed to do is ask questions, so that you can understand what they mean and why they have the opinion that they have, you must understand from where they are speaking, why they have the opinion they have, not just what they are saying. And at the end you will get your turn.