成為談判高手——區(qū)別對(duì)待人和事 Separating the People from the Problem

區(qū)別對(duì)待人和事　Separating the People from the Problem

做生意得和不同類型（personality types）、不同背景（backgrounds）的人打交道。談判中也難免遇到讓你頭昏腦脹的對(duì)手。這個(gè)時(shí)候，正確引領(lǐng)自己的情緒，把任何事區(qū)分開(kāi)來(lái)對(duì)待（dealing with）就非常關(guān)鍵。

無(wú)論如何你要保持清醒的頭腦，掌握話語(yǔ)的主動(dòng)權(quán)。僵持不下時(shí)要分析問(wèn)題的癥結(jié)所在，引導(dǎo)對(duì)方保持理性。必要時(shí)可以提議休息片刻。

☉Let’s get back to the issue on hand.

讓我們回到手頭的問(wèn)題上來(lái)。

☉We’ve been over this before, but I still feel we haven’t reached a good solution.

這個(gè)問(wèn)題以前我們反復(fù)研究過(guò)，但是我覺(jué)得我們?nèi)匀粵](méi)有找到一個(gè)很好的解決方案。

☉I feel frustrated with the problems we are encountering.Let’s take a little break before we go back to this area.

對(duì)于我們現(xiàn)在遇到的問(wèn)題，我感到有些煩躁。讓我們?cè)诶^續(xù)談這個(gè)問(wèn)題前稍作休息吧。

☉I can see that we have some conflict here.

我知道我們?cè)谶@里有些矛盾了。

☉I know that we haven’t seen eye to eye on all these issues, but let’s try to iron out the problems.

我知道我們無(wú)法在所有的事項(xiàng)上都觀點(diǎn)統(tǒng)一。但是，我們一起努力就能解決問(wèn)題。

☉I can feel you are frustrated about some of the terms of our agreement, isthat right？

我感覺(jué)您對(duì)我們協(xié)議中的一些條款感到煩惱了，對(duì)嗎？

☉Let’s focus on what we can do to solve our problem.

讓我們把注意力集中到如何解決我們的問(wèn)題上。

☉Let’s take a look and see what areas are workable.

讓我們來(lái)看看哪些領(lǐng)域是可操作的。

避免敵意

避免談判參與方感覺(jué)自己被批評(píng)或被攻擊（criticized or attacked）。如果對(duì)方感到敵意或不滿而處處設(shè)防（on the defensive），則意味著要說(shuō)服他接受你的建議是相當(dāng)?shù)睦щy。為了避免不必要的誤會(huì)，可以稍作解釋，釋放善意。

☉I understand that you have a different opinion.I understand why you feel that way. Let me explain the reasons why I see another option.

我明白您有不同的觀點(diǎn)，我也明白您為什么那樣想。讓我解釋一下為什么我有另外的想法。

☉We know we aren’t seeing eye to eye, but let’s work to solve the problem together.

我知道我們的意見(jiàn)無(wú)法一致，但是我們一起努力就能解決問(wèn)題。

☉You’re right on about that aspect, but I wonder if you have considered……

從這點(diǎn)上來(lái)講您是對(duì)的，但是我想知道您是否考慮過(guò)……

☉I know you don’t agree with my idea, but maybe you can explain another way to meet my needs.

我知道您不贊同我的觀點(diǎn)，但是也許您可以用另外的途徑來(lái)滿足我的要求。

著眼全局

將注意力集中到解決問(wèn)題的方式上，而不是因?yàn)閷?duì)方的只言片語(yǔ)就捕風(fēng)捉影。主動(dòng)體諒對(duì)方（put yourself in their shoes），而不要總覺(jué)得對(duì)方不懷好意（malignant）?？傊_引導(dǎo)自己的意識(shí)，著眼大局。

☉The errors with the shipment were nobody’s fault.We need to work out our miscommunications so there are no future errors.

船運(yùn)的錯(cuò)誤不是誰(shuí)的過(guò)錯(cuò)。我們得完善溝通才能避免未來(lái)的錯(cuò)誤。

☉I understand you can’t meet my shipment deadline.However, we need to come up with some options that will get my delivery there faster. Let's brainstorm.

我理解您無(wú)法滿足我們的貨運(yùn)時(shí)限。但是，我們得拿出一些辦法來(lái)使得交貨更快些。讓我們動(dòng)動(dòng)腦子。

自我調(diào)解

即便是矛盾出現(xiàn)的時(shí)候，也要互相體諒，給對(duì)方些許時(shí)間來(lái)“消消氣”（let off steam）。發(fā)現(xiàn)自己的情緒有些激動(dòng)的時(shí)候，就提議休息片刻（take a break）來(lái)調(diào)整情緒。動(dòng)怒不會(huì)有任何的幫助，反倒會(huì)“火上澆油”。

A：I can't believe you are being so unreasonable. You have to guarantee a shipment date of two weeks, or we will just have to call off the whole deal. You won't even budge on this one.I can't stand it！

B：Okay, I can see we have some conflict here. I know that we haven't seen eye to eye on all these issues, but I am sure we can work together to iron out the problems. I can see that we are both frustrated.Maybe we should take a little break before we continue talking about this area.

A：我真不敢相信您這樣不講理。您必須保證兩周的貨運(yùn)時(shí)間，否則我們將取消整個(gè)交易。您連這點(diǎn)都不讓步，我真受不了！

B：好的，我知道我們?cè)谶@里有些矛盾了。我知道我們無(wú)法在所有的事項(xiàng)上都統(tǒng)一觀點(diǎn)，但是我肯定我們一起努力就能解決問(wèn)題。我明白我們兩個(gè)都有點(diǎn)煩躁了。也許我們應(yīng)該先休息一會(huì)兒，然后繼續(xù)談這個(gè)問(wèn)題。

總結(jié)

一團(tuán)和氣的談判太少見(jiàn)了，矛盾的沖撞反倒是正常的。如果不能從大局著眼，就事論事，雙方只能針?shù)h相對(duì)、相持不下。總之，要積極引導(dǎo)、自我調(diào)節(jié)、互相理解、取得雙贏。總不能因?yàn)椴幌矚g對(duì)方的個(gè)性就放棄機(jī)會(huì)，那不是在和錢(qián)作對(duì)嗎？

Words　單詞表

error錯(cuò)誤

frustrate沮喪，受挫

investment投資

miscommunication誤解，溝通不利

negotiation談判

production生產(chǎn)

quotation報(bào)價(jià)

satisfy滿足

shipping船運(yùn)

supplier供應(yīng)商，供貨商

term條件

workable可行的，行得通的

Phrases　短語(yǔ)表

be over（go over）sth反復(fù)研究，仔細(xì)琢磨某事

focus on聚焦，集中于

free to（do sth）無(wú)須拘束地去做（某事）

issue on hand手頭的問(wèn)題

just yet但只要；恰好這時(shí)

make an investment投資

meet needs滿足需求

more power to you加油

no kidding不開(kāi)玩笑

price tag價(jià)格標(biāo)簽，價(jià)格牌

reach a solution找到方法/解決方案

see eye to eye看法一致

settle for滿足于；勉強(qiáng)接受

shipping method運(yùn)送方式/貨運(yùn)方式

solve a problem解決問(wèn)題

the whole problem整個(gè)問(wèn)題

You'd better（do sth）你最好（做某事）

實(shí)景對(duì)話1

A：Let's get back to the issue on hand. We need to agree on the price and the delivery times. I know we've been over this before, but I still feel we haven't reached a good solution.

B：We've be over this so many times！If you are not satisfied with our quotation, you're free to look elsewhere. You really won't find anyone much lower than us.And if you do, more power to you.

A：No, Mr. Lin, we are not interested in looking for a new supplier just yet.

We have already made an investment of time in this negotiation. So let's focus on what we can do to solve our problem.

B：We cannot offer you any more of a discount unless you are willing to settle for a later delivery date.

A：Let's take a look and see what areas are workable. You say the discount you originally offered is related to the production date, so if we want a sooner production date, we have a higher cost. Is that right?

B：Yes. That's the whole problem.We need time for production.

A：You're right on about that aspect, but I wonder if you have considered different options for shipping. If we choose a different shipping method, perhaps we could still keep a later production date but receive our products sooner.

B：That won't work because the faster shipping also comes with a higher price tag. If you want a lower price, you'd better think of something else.

A：I know you don't agree with my idea, but maybe you can explain anotherway to meet my needs.

A：讓我們回到手頭的問(wèn)題上來(lái)。我們得商定價(jià)格和交貨時(shí)間。我知道這個(gè)問(wèn)題以前我們反復(fù)研究過(guò)了，但是我覺(jué)得我們?nèi)匀粵](méi)有找到一個(gè)很好的解決方案。

B：這個(gè)問(wèn)題我們已經(jīng)談過(guò)很多次了！如果您對(duì)我們的報(bào)價(jià)不滿意，您完全可以到別處看看。您找不到比我們價(jià)格更低的了。如果您愿意（找），那就盡管找吧！

A：不是的，林先生，我們這個(gè)時(shí)候沒(méi)有興趣再找一個(gè)新的供應(yīng)商。在這筆生意上我們已經(jīng)投入了很多時(shí)間。所以我們還是將精力集中到如何解決問(wèn)題上吧。

B：如果您不愿意接受一個(gè)稍晚的交貨時(shí)間的話，我們沒(méi)有辦法再給您任何折扣了。

A：我們來(lái)看看在哪個(gè)環(huán)節(jié)還能調(diào)整。您說(shuō)之前提供的折扣跟生產(chǎn)日期有關(guān)，所以，如果我們要更早的生產(chǎn)時(shí)間，我們就要付更高的費(fèi)用，對(duì)嗎？

B：是的，所有的問(wèn)題都在于時(shí)間。我們生產(chǎn)是需要時(shí)間的。

A：從這點(diǎn)上來(lái)講您是對(duì)的，但是我想知道您是否考慮過(guò)不同的運(yùn)送方式，如果我們選一個(gè)別的貨運(yùn)方式，也許我們可以在延后生產(chǎn)時(shí)間的同時(shí)提前到貨時(shí)間。

B：那行不通，因?yàn)楦斓呢涍\(yùn)同樣伴隨著更高的費(fèi)用。如果您想要更低的價(jià)格，您得考慮別的方面。

A：我知道您不贊同我的觀點(diǎn)，但是也許您可以另找途徑來(lái)滿足我的要求。

實(shí)景對(duì)話2

A：I can't believe you are being so unreasonable. You have to guarantee a shipment date of two weeks, or we will just have to call off the whole deal. You won't even budge on this one.I can't stand it！

B：Okay, I can see we have some conflict here. I know that we haven't seen eye to eye on all these issues, but I am sure we can work together to iron out the problems. I can see that we are both frustrated.Maybe we should take a little break before we continue talking about this area.

A：No, that's okay. Sorry, I just need you to understand how important the timing is on this shipment. The last shipment we got was a month late， and the result was that we ended-up losing a ton of money on that deal.

B：The errors with that shipment were nobody's fault.We need to workout our miscommunications so that there are no future errors.

A：No kidding！

B：I can feel you are frustrated about some of the terms of our agreement， is that right？

A：Yes. The whole problem is the timing.We aren't seeing eye to eye, but let's work to solve the problem together.

B：We can't meet your shipment deadline now because there is not enough time to make application to customs.

A：I understand you can't meet my shipment deadline. However, we need to come up with some options that will get my delivery there faster. Let's brainstorm.

A：我真不敢相信您這么不講理。您必須保證兩周的貨運(yùn)時(shí)間，否則我們將取消整個(gè)交易。您連這點(diǎn)都不讓步，我真受不了！

B：好的，我知道我們?cè)谶@里有些矛盾了。我知道我們無(wú)法在所有的事項(xiàng)上都觀點(diǎn)統(tǒng)一，但是我肯定我們一起努力就能解決問(wèn)題。我知道我們兩個(gè)都有點(diǎn)煩躁了。也許我們應(yīng)該在繼續(xù)談這個(gè)問(wèn)題前稍作休息。

A：不，沒(méi)事。對(duì)不起，我就是想讓您知道貨運(yùn)的時(shí)間是多么的重要。上一次的貨運(yùn)晚了一個(gè)月，導(dǎo)致那筆交易我們賠了很多錢(qián)。

B：上次的船運(yùn)不是誰(shuí)的錯(cuò)。我們消除不良溝通才能避免以后的錯(cuò)誤。

A：別逗了！

B：我感覺(jué)您對(duì)我們協(xié)議中的一些條款感到煩惱了，對(duì)嗎？

A：是的，所有的問(wèn)題都在于時(shí)間。我們的意見(jiàn)無(wú)法一致，但是我們一起努力就能解決問(wèn)題。

B：我們現(xiàn)在無(wú)法滿足您的貨運(yùn)時(shí)間底線，因?yàn)槲覀儧](méi)有足夠的時(shí)間來(lái)向海關(guān)申請(qǐng)。

A：我理解您無(wú)法滿足我們的貨運(yùn)時(shí)限。但是，我們得拿出一些辦法來(lái)使得交貨更早些。讓我們動(dòng)動(dòng)腦子。