Once upon a time there was a Pussy-cat called Ribby, who invited a little dog called Duchess, to tea.
“Come in good time, my dear Duchess,” said Ribby's letter, “and we will have something so very very nice. I am baking it in a pie-dish—a pie-dish with a pink rim. You never tasted anything so good! And you shall eat it all! I will eat muffins, my dear Duchess!” wrote Ribby.
Duchess read the letter and wrote an answer—“I will come with much pleasure at a quarter past four. But it is very strange. I was just going to invite you to come here, to supper, my dear Ribby, to eat something most delicious.”
“I will come very punctually, my dear Ribby,” wrote Duchess; and then at the end she added—“I hope it isn't mouse?” And then she thought that did not look quite polite; so she scratched out “isn't mouse” and changed it to “I hope it will be fine,” and she gave her letter to the postman. But she thought a great deal about Ribby's pie, and she read Ribby's letter over and over again.
“I am dreadfully afraid it will be mouse!” said Duchess to herself—“I really couldn't, couldn't eat mouse pie. And I shall have to eat it, because it is a party. And my pie was going to be veal and ham. A pink and white pie-dish! and so is mine; just like Ribby's dishes; they were both bought at Tabitha Twitchit's.”
Duchess went into her larder and took the pie off a shelf and looked at it. “It is all ready to put into the oven. Such lovely pie-crust; and I put in a little tin patty-pan to hold up the crust; and I made a hole in the middle with a fork to let out the steam—Oh I do wish I could eat my own pie, instead of a pie made of mouse!”
Duchess considered and considered and read Ribby's letter again—
“A pink and white pie-dish—and you shall eat it all. ‘You’ means me—then Ribby is not going to even taste the pie herself? A pink and white pie-dish! Ribby is sure to go out to buy the muffins… Oh what a good idea! Why shouldn't I rush along and put my pie into Ribby's oven when Ribby isn't there?” Duchess was quite delighted with her own cleverness!
Ribby in the meantime had received Duchess's answer, and as soon as she was sure that the little dog would come—she popped her pie into the oven. There were two ovens, one above the other; some other knobs and handles were only ornamental and not intended to open. Ribby put the pie into the lower oven; the door was very stiff.
“The top oven bakes too quickly,” said Ribby to herself. “It is a pie of the most delicate and tender mouse minced up with bacon. And I have taken out all the bones; because Duchess did nearly choke herself with a fish-bone last time I gave a party. She eats a little fast—rather big mouthfuls. But a most genteel and elegant little dog; infinitely superior company to Cousin Tabitha Twitchit.”
Ribby put on some coal and swept up the hearth. Then she went out with a can to the well, for water to fill up the kettle. Then she began to set the room in order, for it was the sitting-room as well as the kitchen. She shook the mats out at the front door and put them straight; the hearthrug was a rabbit-skin. She dusted the clock and the ornaments on the mantelpiece, and she polished and rubbed the tables and chairs.
Then she spread a very clean white tablecloth, and set out her best china tea-set, which she took out of a wall-cupboard near the fireplace. The tea-cups were white with a pattern of pink roses; and the dinner-plates were white and blue.
When Ribby had laid the table she took a jug and a blue and white dish, and went out down the field to the farm, to fetch milk and butter. When she came back, she peeped into the bottom oven; the pie looked very comfortable.
Ribby put on her shawl and bonnet and went out again with a basket, to the village shop to buy a packet of tea, a pound of lump sugar, and a pot of marmalade.
And just at the same time, Duchess came out of her house, at the other end of the village.
Ribby met Duchess half-way down the street, also carrying a basket, covered with a cloth. They only bowed to one another; they did not speak, because they were going to have a party.
As soon as Duchess had got round the corner out of sight—she simply ran! Straight away to Ribby's house!
Ribby went into the shop and bought what she required, and came out, after a pleasant gossip with Cousin Tabitha Twitchit.
Cousin Tabitha was disdainful afterwards in conversation—
“A little dog indeed! Just as if there were no cats in Sawrey! And a pie for afternoon tea! The very idea!” said Cousin Tabitha Twitchit.
Ribby went on to Timothy Baker's and bought the muffins. Then she went home. There seemed to be a sort of scuffling noise in the back passage, as she was coming in at the front door.
“I trust that is not that Pie: the spoons are locked up, however,” said Ribby. But there was nobody there. Ribby opened the bottom oven door with some difficulty, and turned the pie. There began to be a pleasing smell of baked mouse!
Duchess in the meantime, had slipped out at the back door. “It is a very odd thing that Ribby's pie was not in the oven when I put mine in! And I can't find it anywhere; I have looked all over the house. I put my pie into a nice hot oven at the top. I could not turn any of the other handles; I think that they are all shams,” said Duchess, “but I wish I could have removed the pie made of mouse! I cannot think what she has done with it? I heard Ribby coming and I had to run out by the back door!”
Duchess went home and brushed her beautiful black coat; and then she picked a bunch of flowers in her garden as a present for Ribby; and passed the time until the clock struck four.
Ribby—having assured herself by careful search that there was really no one hiding in the cupboard or in the larder—went upstairs to change her dress. She put on a lilac silk gown, for the party, and an embroidered muslin apron and tippet.
“It is very strange,” said Ribby, “I did not think I left that drawer pulled out; has somebody been trying on my mittens?” She came downstairs again, and made the tea, and put the teapot on the hob. She peeped again into the bottom oven; the pie had become a lovely brown, and it was steaming hot.
She sat down before the fire to wait for the little dog. “I am glad I used the bottom oven,” said Ribby, “the top one would certainly have been very much too hot. I wonder why that cupboard door was open? Can there really have been someone in the house?”
Very punctually at four o'clock, Duchess started to go to the party. She ran so fast through the village that she was too early, and she had to wait a little while in the lane that leads down to Ribby's house.
“I wonder if Ribby has taken my pie out of the oven yet?” said Duchess, “and whatever can have become of the other pie made of mouse?”
At a quarter past four to the minute, there came a most genteel little tap-tappity. “Is Mrs. Ribston at home?” inquired Duchess in the porch.
“Come in! and how do you do? my dear Duchess,” cried Ribby. “I hope I see you well?”
“Quite well, I thank you, and how do you do, my dear Ribby?” said Duchess. “I've brought you some flowers; what a delicious smell of pie!”
“Oh, what lovely flowers! Yes, it is mouse and bacon!”
“Do not talk about food, my dear Ribby,” said Duchess; “what a lovely white tea-cloth! . . . Is it done to a turn? Is it still in the oven?”
“I think it wants another five minutes,” said Ribby. “Just a shade longer; I will pour out the tea, while we wait. Do you take sugar, my dear Duchess?”
“Oh yes, please! my dear Ribby; and may I have a lump upon my nose?”
“With pleasure, my dear Duchess; how beautifully you beg! Oh, how sweetly pretty!”
Duchess sat up with the sugar on her nose and sniffed— “How good that pie smells! I do love veal and ham—I mean to say mouse and bacon—” She dropped the sugar in confusion, and had to go hunting under the tea-table, so she did not see which oven Ribby opened in order to get out the pie.
Ribby set the pie upon the table; there was a very savoury smell.
Duchess came out from under the tablecloth munching sugar, and sat up on a chair.
“I will first cut the pie for you; I am going to have muffin and marmalade,” said Ribby.
“Do you really prefer muffin? Mind the patty-pan!”
“I beg your pardon?” said Ribby.
“May I pass you the marmalade?” said Duchess hurriedly.
The pie proved extremely toothsome, and the muffins light and hot. They disappeared rapidly, especially the pie!
“I think”—(thought the Duchess to herself)—“I think it would be wiser if I helped myself to pie; though Ribby did not seem to notice anything when she was cutting it. What very small fine pieces it has cooked into! I did not remember that I had minced it up so fine; I suppose this is a quicker oven than my own.”
“How fast Duchess is eating!” thought Ribby to herself, as she buttered her fifth muffin.
The pie-dish was emptying rapidly! Duchess had had four helps already, and was fumbling with the spoon.
“A little more bacon, my dear Duchess?” said Ribby.
“Thank you, my dear Ribby; I was only feeling for the patty-pan.”
“The patty-pan? my dear Duchess?”
“The patty-pan that held up the pie-crust,” said Duchess, blushing under her black coat.
“Oh, I didn't put one in, my dear Duchess,” said Ribby; “I don't think that it is necessary in pies made of mouse.”
Duchess fumbled with the spoon—“I can't find it!” she said anxiously.
“There isn't a patty-pan,” said Ribby, looking perplexed.
“Yes, indeed, my dear Ribby; where can it have gone to?” said Duchess.
“There most certainly is not one, my dear Duchess. I disapprove of tin articles in puddings and pies. It is most undesirable—(especially when people swallow in lumps!)” she added in a lower voice.
Duchess looked very much alarmed, and continued to scoop the inside of the pie-dish.
“My Great-aunt Squintina (grandmother of Cousin Tabitha Twitchit)—died of a thimble in a Christmas plum-pudding. I never put any article of metal in my puddings or pies.”
Duchess looked aghast, and tilted up the pie-dish.
“I have only four patty-pans, and they are all in the cupboard.”
Duchess set up a howl.
“I shall die! I shall die! I have swallowed a patty-pan! Oh, my dear Ribby, I do feel so ill!”
“It is impossible, my dear Duchess; there was not a patty-pan.”
Duchess moaned and whined and rocked herself about.
“Oh I feel so dreadful. I have swallowed a patty-pan!”
“There was nothing in the pie,” said Ribby severely.
“Yes there was, my dear Ribby, I am sure I have swallowed it!”
“Let me prop you up with a pillow, my dear Duchess; where do you think you feel it?”
“Oh I do feel so ill all over me, my dear Ribby; I have swallowed a large tin patty-pan with a sharp scalloped edge!”
“Shall I run for the doctor? I will just lock up the spoons!”
“Oh yes, yes! fetch Dr. Maggotty, my dear Ribby; he is a Pie himself, he will certainly understand.”
Ribby settled Duchess in an armchair before the fire, and went out and hurried to the village to look for the doctor. She found him at the smithy. He was occupied in putting rusty nails into a bottle of ink, which he had obtained at the post office.
“Gammon? ha! HA!” said he, with his head on one side.
Ribby explained that her guest had swallowed a patty-pan.
“Spinach? ha! HA!” said he, and accompanied her with alacrity.
He hopped so fast that Ribby had to run. It was most conspicuous. All the village could see that Ribby was fetching the doctor.
“I knew they would over-eat themselves!” said Cousin Tabitha Twitchit.
But while Ribby had been hunting for the doctor—a curious thing had happened to Duchess, who had been left by herself, sitting before the fire, sighing and groaning and feeling very unhappy.
“How could I have swallowed it! such a large thing as a patty-pan!”
She got up and went to the table, and felt inside the pie-dish again with a spoon.
“No; there is no patty-pan, and I put one in; and nobody has eaten pie except me, so I must have swallowed it!”
She sat down again, and stared mournfully at the grate. The fire crackled and danced, and something sizz-z-zled!
Duchess started! She opened the door of the top oven;—out came a rich steamy flavour of veal and ham, and there stood a fine brown pie—and through a hole in the top of the pie-crust there was a glimpse of a little tin patty-pan!
Duchess drew a long breath—“Then I must have been eating Mouse!…No wonder I feel ill… But perhaps I should feel worse if I had really swallowed a patty-pan!” Duchess reflected—“What a very awkward thing to have to explain to Ribby! I think I will put my pie in the back-yard and say nothing about it. When I go home, I will run round and take it away.” She put it outside the back door, and sat down again by the fire, and shut her eyes; when Ribby arrived with the doctor, she seemed fast asleep.
“Gammon, ha, HA?” said the doctor.
“I am feeling very much better,” said Duchess, waking up with a jump.
“I am truly glad to hear it! He has brought you a pill, my dear Duchess!”
“I think I should feel quite well if he only felt my pulse,” said Duchess, backing away from the magpie, who sidled up with something in his beak.
“It is only a bread-pill, you had much better take it; drink a little milk, my dear Duchess!”
“Gammon? Gammon?” said the doctor, while Duchess coughed and choked.
“Don't say that again!” said Ribby, losing her temper—“Here, take this bread and jam, and get out into the yard!”
“Gammon and spinach! ha ha HA!” shouted Dr. Maggotty triumphantly outside the back door…
“I am feeling very much better, my dear Ribby,” said Duchess. “Do you not think that I had better go home before it gets dark?”
“Perhaps it might be wise, my dear Duchess. I will lend you a nice warm shawl, and you shall take my arm.”
“I would not trouble you for worlds; I feel wonderfully better. One pill of Dr. Maggotty—”
“Indeed it is most admirable, if it has cured you of a patty-pan! I will call directly after breakfast to ask how you have slept.”
Ribby and Duchess said good-bye affectionately, and Duchess started home. Half-way up the lane she stopped and looked back; Ribby had gone in and shut her door. Duchess slipped through the fence, and ran round to the back of Ribby's house, and peeped into the yard.
Upon the roof of the pig-stye sat Dr. Maggotty and three jackdaws. The jackdaws were eating pie-crust, and the magpie was drinking gravy out of a patty-pan.
“Gammon, ha, HA!” he shouted when he saw Duchess's little black nose peeping round the corner.
Duchess ran home feeling uncommonly silly!
When Ribby came out for a pailful of water to wash up the tea-things, she found a pink and white pie-dish lying smashed in the middle of the yard. The patty-pan was under the pump, where Dr. Maggotty had considerately left it.
Ribby stared with amazement—“Did you ever see the like! so there really was a patty-pan?…But my patty-pans are all in the kitchen cupboard. Well I never did! … Next time I want to give a party—I will invite Cousin Tabitha Twitchit!”
THE END
從前,有一只叫瑞比的小貓,她邀請(qǐng)一只叫公爵夫人的小狗來吃茶點(diǎn)。
“盡早過來,我親愛的公爵夫人,”瑞比的信中這么寫道,“我們會(huì)享用一些非常非常好的東西。我正在用一個(gè)帶粉色花邊的餡餅盤烘烤它哦。你從來都沒吃過這么好吃的東西!你會(huì)把它全都吃掉的。而我會(huì)吃松餅,親愛的公爵夫人?!?/p>
公爵夫人讀了這封信,并寫了回信:“我非常開心受到邀請(qǐng),我會(huì)在四點(diǎn)一刻拜訪。但是,真是巧了,我本來是正要邀請(qǐng)你來我這里吃晚飯的,我親愛的瑞比,我想請(qǐng)你吃一些最最美味的東西?!?/p>
“我會(huì)準(zhǔn)時(shí)到達(dá)的,我親愛的瑞比,”公爵夫人寫道。在信的結(jié)尾,她又加了一句,“我希望不是老鼠肉吧?”不過,她又覺得這樣寫似乎顯得不太禮貌,所以,她便把“不是老鼠肉吧”給劃掉了,改成了“我希望天氣會(huì)很好”,然后將信交給了郵差。但是,她一直在琢磨瑞比的餡餅,所以,便將瑞比的信讀了一遍又一遍。
“我真擔(dān)心死了,萬一是老鼠肉呢!”公爵夫人自言自語道,“我真的真的吃不下老鼠肉餡餅。而我卻不得不吃,因?yàn)檫@是一次聚會(huì)。我本來要烤牛肉和火腿餡餅的。一個(gè)粉邊的白色餡餅盤子!我的盤子也是這樣的,和瑞比的一樣,都是在塔比莎·特遲特的店里買的。”
公爵夫人走進(jìn)她的食品儲(chǔ)藏室,從架子上拿下餡餅,看了又看,說道:“一切都準(zhǔn)備好了,就差放進(jìn)烤箱里了。多么可愛的餡餅脆皮啊,我把原料放在了一個(gè)小的餡餅?zāi)W永锩?,這樣就能保持脆皮的形狀,我還用叉子在餡餅中間戳了一個(gè)洞,以便排出蒸汽——啊,我真希望能夠吃我自己的餡餅啊,而不是用老鼠肉做的餡餅?!?/p>
公爵夫人思來想去,于是又把瑞比的信讀了一遍:
“一個(gè)帶粉邊的白色餡餅盤——你會(huì)把它整個(gè)吃光的?!恪侵肝摇敲矗鸨茸约菏遣粫?huì)嘗那個(gè)餡餅了?一個(gè)粉邊的白色餡餅盤!瑞比肯定會(huì)去外面買松餅……啊,真是個(gè)好主意!為什么我不趁瑞比不在的時(shí)候趕過去,把我的餡餅放進(jìn)瑞比的烤箱里面呢?”公爵夫人非常滿意自己的聰明。
同時(shí),瑞比接到了公爵夫人的回信,一得知小狗能來赴約,她便把她的餡餅放到了烤箱里。她有兩個(gè)烤箱,摞在一起,一個(gè)上,一個(gè)下。她的烤箱上有些把手和手柄都是裝飾性的,并不能打開烤箱。瑞比把餡餅放到了下面的那個(gè)烤箱里,那個(gè)烤箱的門很難開。
“上面的這個(gè)烤箱烤東西時(shí)火太急了。”瑞比對(duì)自己說,“這是一個(gè)用最細(xì)嫩的老鼠肉混合培根做成的餡餅,我把所有骨頭都去掉了,上一次我宴請(qǐng)公爵夫人的時(shí)候,她差一點(diǎn)兒被魚骨頭給卡得窒息了。她吃東西有點(diǎn)兒快——又總是大口大口地吃。但她是一只非常有教養(yǎng)又文雅的小狗,如果選朋友,她相比于塔比莎·特遲特表姐來說,簡(jiǎn)直是好得太多了?!?/p>
瑞比又加了一些煤,并清理了爐邊。然后她帶著一個(gè)水罐到了井邊打水,灌滿水壺。接著,她開始整理房間——這個(gè)房間既用作客廳也用作廚房。她在前門把墊子抖了抖,又放平整,爐前地毯是一塊兔皮的。她擦拭了時(shí)鐘和壁爐臺(tái)上的擺設(shè),又把桌椅都擦得光可鑒人。
然后,她又鋪開一張干凈的白色桌布,從壁爐旁的壁櫥中拿出了她最好的一套瓷器擺好。那茶杯是白色的,上面有粉色玫瑰的花紋,而餐盤則是藍(lán)白相間的。
瑞比擺放好桌子之后,便帶上一個(gè)罐子和一個(gè)藍(lán)白相間的盤子,穿過田野,去附近的農(nóng)場(chǎng),取牛奶和黃油?;貋碇?,她看了看下面的烤箱,里面的餡餅看上去非常不錯(cuò)。
瑞比圍上圍巾,戴上小帽,提上籃子,又出門了,她要去村子里的商店買一包茶葉、一磅方糖和一瓶果醬。
而就在這時(shí),公爵夫人離開了她在村子另一頭的家。
瑞比在街上碰到了公爵夫人,看到她也提著籃子,上面蓋著一塊布。她們彼此弓身致意,但沒有說話,因?yàn)樗齻兙鸵蹠?huì)了。
公爵夫人一走過街角,離開瑞比的視線,便跑了起來——直奔瑞比的家!
瑞比去了商店,買了需要的東西,和塔比莎·特遲特表姐開心地閑聊了幾句,然后才離開。
后來,塔比莎表姐提起這件事時(shí),非常不屑。
“請(qǐng)一只小狗!就好像索里這一帶沒有貓一樣!居然準(zhǔn)備了一個(gè)餡餅在下午茶時(shí)吃!真想得出來!”塔比莎·特遲特表姐說。
瑞比又去了蒂莫西面包房買了松餅,然后才回家。就在她從前門進(jìn)去的時(shí)候,后面的走廊傳來了窸窸窣窣的聲音。
“我相信這不是喜鵲搗的亂,而且勺子也都鎖起來了?!比鸨日f。不過,沒發(fā)現(xiàn)有人在那兒。瑞比用了些力氣打開下面的烤箱門,把餡餅翻了一面。已經(jīng)開始聞到烤鼠肉散發(fā)出的陣陣誘人的香氣了。
而就在這時(shí),公爵夫人從后門溜了出去。“真奇怪,我把我的餡餅放到烤箱里時(shí),并沒有看到瑞比的餡餅呀。四處都找不到,我可是把整個(gè)房子都找了一遍了。我把餡餅放到了上面那個(gè)漂亮的熱烤箱里。但轉(zhuǎn)不動(dòng)其他的把手,那些應(yīng)該都是樣子貨?!惫舴蛉苏f,“但我真希望能夠拿走那個(gè)用老鼠肉做的餡餅!真不知道瑞比到底把它放哪兒去了,我聽到瑞比回來了,不得不從后門跑出來?!?/p>
公爵夫人回到家,把她美麗的黑色皮毛梳了好幾遍,然后從自家的花園里面采了一束花,作為送給瑞比的禮物,時(shí)間就這么過去了,時(shí)鐘敲了四下,已是四點(diǎn)鐘了。
瑞比把自己的家仔細(xì)檢查了一遍,確認(rèn)不論是壁櫥里還是食品儲(chǔ)藏室里面都沒有藏著任何人,然后便上樓去換了一條裙子。她穿上一件淡紫色的絲綢長(zhǎng)裙,圍上一件繡花的平紋細(xì)布圍裙和一條披肩。
“真奇怪,”瑞比說,“我不記得自己把抽屜打開了,是有人想要試我的連指手套嗎?”她又下樓去,泡了茶,然后把茶壺放在爐架上。接著她又看了看下面的烤箱,餡餅現(xiàn)在已經(jīng)變成了誘人的焦黃色,熱氣騰騰的。
她坐在壁爐前面,等候小狗的來訪?!斑€好我用了下面的那個(gè)烤箱?!比鸨日f,“上面那個(gè)肯定太熱了。真奇怪,壁櫥的門怎么是開著的呀?難道家里真的有人進(jìn)來過?”
四點(diǎn)整,公爵夫人出發(fā)去參加聚會(huì)。她以自己最快的速度穿過了村子,結(jié)果到瑞比家的時(shí)候太早了,所以就站在通向瑞比家的小巷子里等了一會(huì)兒。
“瑞比有沒有把我的餡餅從烤箱里拿出來呢?”公爵夫人說,“另一個(gè)用老鼠做的餡餅到底哪兒去了?”
四點(diǎn)一刻,準(zhǔn)時(shí)響起了一聲最最文雅的輕輕的敲門聲?!叭鸨人雇ㄌ诩覇幔俊惫舴蛉苏驹陂T廊上問道。
“快請(qǐng)進(jìn)!你好嗎,我親愛的公爵夫人?”瑞比叫道,“希望你一切都好??!”
“非常好,謝謝,你呢,我親愛的瑞比?”公爵夫人說,“我給你帶了些花來,好香的餡餅味?。 ?/p>
“啊,這花真漂亮啊!對(duì),餡餅是老鼠肉和培根餡的。”
“先別談吃的,我親愛的瑞比,”公爵夫人說,“好漂亮的茶巾啊!……那餡餅翻過面了嗎?還在烤箱里嗎?”
“我覺得還需要五分鐘才能熟?!比鸨日f,“再等一小會(huì)兒就行。趁著這工夫,我來倒茶吧!你需要加糖嗎,親愛的公爵夫人?”
“噢,加,謝謝!我親愛的瑞比,我能拿一塊放在我的鼻子上嗎?”
“當(dāng)然可以,親愛的公爵夫人,你的請(qǐng)求實(shí)在太有禮貌了!你真是太可愛太可親了!”
公爵夫人把糖放在自己的鼻子上,嗅了嗅,說:“餡餅的味道聞起來真好??!我真喜歡牛肉和火腿——我是說老鼠肉和培根——”慌亂之中,她把糖弄掉了,不得不鉆到茶幾下面去尋找,所以她并沒有看到瑞比拿餡餅的時(shí)候打開的是哪一個(gè)烤箱。
瑞比把餡餅放在了桌子上,那餡餅散發(fā)的香味真能讓人口水都流下來。
公爵夫人嚼著糖從桌布下面鉆了出來,在一把椅子上坐好。
“我先替你切餡餅,我要吃些松餅和果醬?!比鸨日f。
“你真的更喜歡松餅嗎?小心那餡餅?zāi)W樱 ?/p>
“抱歉,你說什么?”瑞比說。
“要我把果醬遞給你嗎?”公爵夫人匆忙掩飾說。
餡餅十分可口,松餅綿軟熱乎,都很快被一掃而光,特別是餡餅!
公爵夫人心里想,“我覺得如果我自己拿餡餅的話會(huì)更好,盡管瑞比在切的時(shí)候似乎并沒有注意到什么。這餡餅被烘烤得成了這么細(xì)的小塊兒!我真不記得我把肉餡切得這么碎。我猜,這個(gè)烤箱比我自己的那個(gè)要加熱快?!?/p>
“公爵夫人吃得可真快!”瑞比一邊給自己的第五塊松餅涂黃油一邊想。
餡餅盤子很快就空了!公爵夫人已經(jīng)吃了四塊餡餅,正用勺子探索著什么。
“再來點(diǎn)兒培根吧,親愛的公爵夫人?”瑞比說。
“謝謝了,親愛的瑞比,我只是想找餡餅?zāi)W?。?/p>
“餡餅?zāi)W??親愛的公爵夫人,你說什么?”
“就是讓餡餅外皮保持形狀的餡餅?zāi)W印!惫舴蛉撕谏っ碌哪樇t了。
“噢,我沒用餡餅?zāi)W?,親愛的公爵夫人,”瑞比說,“我覺得做老鼠肉餡餅沒必要用餡餅?zāi)W?。?/p>
公爵夫人仍在用勺子搜尋著?!拔艺也坏搅??!彼辜钡卣f。
“沒有餡餅?zāi)W印!比鸨瓤雌饋硎掷Щ蟆?/p>
“是啊,真的,親愛的瑞比,它跑哪兒去了呢?”公爵夫人說。
“肯定沒有,親愛的公爵夫人。我不喜歡在布丁和餡餅里放鐵皮做的東西,太不方便了——尤其是有人狼吞虎咽的時(shí)候?!比鸨扔值吐曆a(bǔ)充說。
公爵夫人看起來驚慌不已,繼續(xù)在餡餅盤里面挖。
“我姑婆斯奎提娜,也就是塔比莎·特遲特表姐的祖母,就因?yàn)樵谑フQ節(jié)的時(shí)候,吃李子布丁吃到了一個(gè)頂針給噎死了。我從來都不在我的布丁和餡餅里面放金屬做的東西?!?/p>
公爵夫人大吃一驚,把餡餅盤翻了過來。
“我只有四個(gè)餡餅?zāi)W樱F(xiàn)在都在壁櫥里面呢?!?/p>
公爵夫人發(fā)出一陣哀號(hào)。
“我要死了!我要死了!我吞了一個(gè)餡餅?zāi)W?!啊,親愛的瑞比,我覺得不舒服極了?!?/p>
“不可能,親愛的公爵夫人,根本沒有什么餡餅?zāi)W?。?/p>
公爵夫人呻吟著,哀號(hào)著,身子搖來搖去。
“我覺得很難受,我肯定吞了一個(gè)餡餅?zāi)W?。?/p>
“餡餅里面什么都沒有?!比鸨群茑嵵氐卣f。
“有的,有的,親愛的瑞比,我肯定吞下去了?!?/p>
“我拿個(gè)枕頭給你靠著吧,親愛的公爵夫人,你覺得那餡餅?zāi)W釉谀膬???/p>
“啊,我覺得我渾身都難受,親愛的瑞比,我肯定吞了一個(gè)大個(gè)兒的餡餅?zāi)W?,還有著尖銳的扇貝狀的邊兒?!?/p>
“需要我去請(qǐng)醫(yī)生嗎?我把勺子鎖起來就行。”
“噢,需要,需要!快去請(qǐng)瑪戈蒂醫(yī)生,親愛的瑞比,他就姓餡餅,是只喜鵲[1],他肯定能理解我的?!?/p>
瑞比將公爵夫人安頓在壁爐前的扶手椅里面,便匆匆忙忙地出門去請(qǐng)村子里的醫(yī)生。她在鐵匠鋪找到了醫(yī)生。醫(yī)生正在忙著把生銹的釘子放到一個(gè)墨水瓶里面,墨水瓶是他在郵局得到的。
“熏豬腿?哈?哈?”他說話的時(shí)候頭側(cè)向一邊。
瑞比解釋說自己的客人吞下了一個(gè)餡餅?zāi)W印?/p>
“菠菜?哈?哈?”他說著,動(dòng)作迅速地走到了瑞比身邊。
他跳著向前走,速度非???,瑞比不得不跑著才能跟上。這簡(jiǎn)直太引人注目了。整個(gè)村子的人都看到瑞比請(qǐng)來了醫(yī)生。
“我就知道她們肯定會(huì)吃撐了的!”塔比莎表姐說。
就在瑞比找醫(yī)生時(shí),公爵夫人遇到了一件怪事兒。她獨(dú)自坐在壁爐前面,呻吟著,覺得非常不開心。
“我怎么會(huì)吞下去呢!餡餅?zāi)W幽敲创蟮臇|西!”
她站起身,走到桌邊,又用勺子在餡餅盤里面找餡餅?zāi)W印?/p>
“沒有,這里沒有,我肯定放了一個(gè)進(jìn)去的,除了我也沒有人吃餡餅,我肯定是把它吞下去了!”
她又坐下來,滿懷悲傷地盯著壁爐架?;疣栲枧九镜?zé)?,火苗舞?dòng)著,這個(gè)時(shí)候,有什么東西發(fā)出了嗞嗞的聲音。
公爵夫人吃了一驚!她打開了上層烤箱的門,從里面冒出了濃郁的牛肉和火腿的香氣,里面是一個(gè)誘人的棕色餡餅。而通過脆皮上面的那個(gè)小孔,可以看到里面有一個(gè)小小的金屬做的餡餅?zāi)W印?/p>
公爵夫人長(zhǎng)長(zhǎng)地吸了一口氣。“那么,我肯定是吃了老鼠肉了!……難怪我覺得難受呢!……不過如果我吞了餡餅?zāi)W?,?yīng)該會(huì)更難受吧?!惫舴蛉嘶叵胫?,“這要跟瑞比解釋,可真是尷尬死了!我想我還是把我的餡餅放到后院,什么都不說的好。等我回家的時(shí)候,可以繞到后面把它拿走?!彼佯W餅放到了后門外面,又在火爐邊坐好,閉上眼睛。等瑞比帶著醫(yī)生來到的時(shí)候,她似乎已經(jīng)睡熟了。
“熏豬腿,哈,哈?”醫(yī)生說。
“我覺得好多了?!惫舴蛉艘幌伦有蚜诉^來。
“聽到這消息我真的非常開心。他給你帶來了藥,親愛的公爵夫人!”
“我覺得,他光給我把把脈就夠了?!惫舴蛉撕笸艘徊?,離嘴里含著東西悄悄走進(jìn)的喜鵲遠(yuǎn)了一些。
“這只是個(gè)面包藥丸,你最好吃了它,然后再喝點(diǎn)牛奶,親愛的公爵夫人。”
“熏豬腿?熏豬腿?”醫(yī)生說,這時(shí)公爵夫人咳嗽起來,甚至有點(diǎn)兒透不過氣。
“別說了!”瑞比控制不住自己的脾氣了,“給,拿上這塊果醬面包,立刻出去,到院子里去!”
“熏豬腿和菠菜!哈哈哈!”后門外傳來瑪戈蒂醫(yī)生歡欣雀躍的喊叫聲。
“我覺得好多了,親愛的瑞比,”公爵夫人說,“你說,我是不是最好在天黑之前回家呢?”
“也許的確是這樣的,親愛的公爵夫人,我給你找條又漂亮又暖和的披肩,你可以挽著我的胳膊,我送你回去?!?/p>
“無論如何我都不該再麻煩你了,我真的覺得好多了?,敻甑籴t(yī)生的一顆藥——”
“如果它把你吞的餡餅?zāi)W咏o治好了,那的確是很神奇??!明天吃過早飯之后我會(huì)去拜訪你,看看你睡得怎么樣?!?/p>
瑞比和公爵夫人熱情地道別,公爵夫人便啟程回家。走到巷子一半的地方,她停了下來,轉(zhuǎn)身看了看,瑞比已經(jīng)回屋關(guān)上了門。公爵夫人偷偷地翻過柵欄,繞到瑞比房子的后面,向院子里望。
豬圈的頂上,瑪戈蒂醫(yī)生和三只寒鴉正落在那里。寒鴉們正在吃著餡餅的脆皮,而喜鵲醫(yī)生正在喝著餡餅?zāi)W永锩娴娜鉁?/p>
“熏豬腿,哈,哈!”看到公爵夫人的小黑鼻子從拐角處露出來的時(shí)候,他叫道。
公爵夫人一路跑回了家,感覺自己簡(jiǎn)直蠢透了!
當(dāng)瑞比出來準(zhǔn)備打一桶水回去洗茶具的時(shí)候,看到院子中間有一個(gè)打碎了的粉邊白底的餡餅盤。餡餅?zāi)W泳驮谒孟旅?,是瑪戈蒂醫(yī)生故意留在那里的。
瑞比吃驚地盯著它:“誰遇到過這樣的事情呢!那么真的是有一個(gè)餡餅?zāi)W??而我的餡餅?zāi)W佣荚趶N房的壁櫥里面。好吧,我從來都沒有用過。下一次我要是再辦聚會(huì)——還是邀請(qǐng)塔比莎表姐吧?!?/p>
* * *
[1]喜鵲的英文和餡餅的英文都是pie。
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