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雙語·老屋子 第二章

所屬教程:譯林版·老屋子

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2022年05月20日

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掃描二維碼方便學習和分享

Chapter 2

Cordt sat in one of the arm-chairs by the chimney, reading.

He was in evening clothes and held his crush-hat and his gloves on his knees. He turned the pages quickly. Every moment, he swept his thick hair from his forehead; every moment, he looked at Fru Adelheid, who was walking up and down the foor with her hands behind her back.

She was very tall and slender. Her face was as white as her white gown. Her mouth was very red, her eyes looked large and strange. She wore fowers in her hair and at her waist.

“You are not reading, Cordt,”she said; but she passed with her back to him.

He closed the book and laid it aside. Then he moved the chair so as to turn his face towards her. His eyes were larger than hers and steadier, his mouth frmer.

“How beautiful you are!”he said.

She laughed softly and took his hand and kissed it:

“How charming of you!”she said.

She began to walk again. He stretched out his legs and lay with his head back in the chair, but followed her all the time with his eyes. Now and again, she stopped, smoothed her gown, let her fingers stray over the keys of the spinet and then went out on the balcony through the open door. He could not see her from where hewas sitting, but the white train of her dress lay inside the room and he looked at that.

Then she returned, sat on the arm of the other chair and swung her foot to and fro.

“I do not like you to be in good spirits, Adelheid,”he said.

Her eyes shone. She looked at the fireplace, where a log lay glowing:

“You should drink a glass of wine, Cordt.”

“I do not care for wine.”

“No more do I. But I like its exhilaration. It makes one so light-hearted. Then everything becomes so charming.”

“Have you been drinking?”

“But, Cordt…what makes you ask that?”

“Because you are so light-hearted and I so charming.”

She went up to him and laid her cheek against his hair:

“Now don't spoil it for me,”she said.“You can, with a single word, and that would be a great, great sin. You say I am pretty; and I am glad because you think so and because I am going out with you and because you are handsome and belong to me. We shall be far from each other and close together for all that. We shall nod to each other, as we always do, and know what we know.”

He released himself from her gently:

“Sit down a little,”he said,“and talk to me.”

She kissed him and sat down in the chair and then and there forgot her despondency. Her eyes shone as before. He raked out the embers and threw a log upon them. They sat and watched it catch fre and saw the smoke surround it and rise up. Her foot tapped the carpet; he shaded his eyes with his hand and pursued his thoughts:

“In my frst year at the university,”he said,“there were fve of us who were chums and we used to meet every Saturday evening. It was generally at my rooms, for I could best afford it. We used to sit and drink wine until bright daylight and then take one another home.”

“You must have drunk a great deal.”

“I don't know. Perhaps we did. We talked so loud and deep. The wine made us feel bigger, braver and cleverer. Next day, we were quite different, more reserved and cool. But we could look one another boldly in the face, for we had nothing to repent of. It did not matter if we had allowed ourselves to be carried away. We knew one another so well and trusted one another.”

She sat and looked at him as he spoke, but said nothing. Lost in thought, he continued to throw logs on the fre until she took one out of his hand and put it aside:

“You'll set the house on fre!”

“One should never drink wine with strangers,”he said.“You see, it is so degrading to be stripped bare. And that is just what happens.”

“You say that as if it meant getting drunk.”

He paid no attention to her words, but went on:

“One unbuttons one's self, one reveals one's self. Look at your eyes and your smile. I have felt it in my own eyes: hundreds of times, I have suddenly seen them all naked together round the table.”

“In good company, Cordt?”

“Where else?”

“I don't understand that,”she said.“I do not know the people whom you speak of.”

“You will be with them this evening, Adelheid.”

She shrugged her shoulders discontentedly and tapped her foot on the carpet.

“Adelheid.”

She looked at him and her eyes were dark and angry. He took her hand and held it fast in his:

“I have seen it in eyes that were looking at you, Adelheid.”

She drew her hand away:

“This is hideous, Cordt!”

She rose and went to the balcony-door. He looked after her and his eyes gleamed:

“Adelheid.”

She stood with her back to him, leaning against the window-frame, and buttoned her gloves. He leant forward and gripped the arms of his chair with his hands:

“I have seen it in your eyes, Adelheid.”

She did not move, uttered not a word. When she had fnished buttoning her gloves, she gathered up her train and went out on the balcony.

The May air was cold and she shivered in her thin gown. The lamps shone dimly through the mist; many carriages drove across the square. She could hear the tinkling of the harness-bells in the gateway; the footman was tramping up and down below.

She turned and stood at the window and looked at Cordt. He had moved his chair round towards the fireplace. She could see nothing of him but one shoulder and arm, his thick hair and his legs.

“The carriage is there,”she said.

He rose and went to her.

“You must not be angry with me,”he said, gently.“I am out of sorts.”

“Are you ill?”

“Yes…perhaps.…No, not that.”

“Well, for all that I care, we can stay at home. You have spoilt my pleasure.”

“Have I?”

“Of course you have. It was for you I made myself look so nice…it was with you I wanted to go out.”

“Was it?”

He took her hand and drew her to the fre:

“Sit down, Adelheid…there…only for a minute. Shall we stay at home to-night…get some wine…h(huán)ave a party of our own…?”

“Yes…you're in such a festive mood!”

“Now be good, Adelheid. You are my only dissipation…You know you are…there have been hundreds of delightful days to prove it. If you are of my mind to-night, we will do this. And you will be beautiful for me and I for you and our eyes will sparkle together.”

She did not look at him, but shook her head:

“I will stay at home, if you wish it,”she said.

They sat silent. The candles on the mantelpiece flickered and guttered in the draught.

“It is strange,”he said.“Do you remember the evening in London, Adelheid, when we were to go to that great ball? Then I begged you to stay at home and you did and you were glad.”

She lay far back in her chair, with her arms behind her neck:

“I was not glad that evening,”she said.

He raised his head and listened.

“I submitted, Cordt, but I was not glad to. I was acting a part, for your sake.”

She met his eyes. Hers were still and sad and she did not remove them while she spoke:

“I was wicked, Cordt. I hated you. I told you a lie. I was dancing at the ball, hour after hour, while I sat and held your hand and laughed so gaily.”

She slipped from her chair and crouched before him, with her hands folded round his knee and her eyes fxed humbly on his face:

“Do not look at me so strangely, Cordt. That is how I am. I love you. But I cannot live without the others…without having them to see it, to see my happiness. I want to be pretty and I want them to fall in love with me and I want to belong to you. I only care to be pretty if I am loved. Don't look like that, Cordt.”

She clung to him with eyes of entreaty.

“I am not really wicked, Cordt…am I? I was with our little baby day and night when he was ill…wasn't I, Cordt?”

“Yes,”he said.

“Yes…I was. But I cannot always be quiet.”

He lifted her from her chair and crossed the room with his arm round her waist. They went out on the balcony. A carriage came across the square at a brisk trot, followed soon after by a multitude of others. They came from the streets all round, but drove away in the same direction and disappeared round a street corner. The horses' hoofs clattered against the pavement, the lamps shone on the glittering carriages, coachmen and footmen sat stiff and black on their boxes.

“Come, Adelheid,”he said.“Let us go.”

The candles on the mantelpiece burnt down and the faces in the big chairs grinned in the darkness. When day dawned, the old servant came and arranged the room. When it was evening, he lit the candles.

He did this the next day and the next and many days after. The sun rose and the sun set. The water splashed in the fountain. The lamps shone and the people swarmed over the square. The balcony was bright with its red flowers and, every evening, the light fell through the open door.

But the summer passed and no one entered the room.

第二章

科特坐在靠近壁爐的扶手椅上看書。

他穿著晚禮服,將禮帽和手套擺在膝蓋上,快速地翻動書頁,不停地從額頭向后捋著濃密的頭發(fā),并不時看看背著手走來走去的阿德爾海德。

阿德爾海德身材非常高挑,臉蛋兒如同她的白色禮裙一般白皙。她的嘴巴非常紅艷,眼睛看上去大而奇異。她在頭發(fā)上和腰間別了鮮花。

“你并沒有在看書,科特?!卑⒌聽柡5抡f道,不過她從他身邊走開了。

科特把書合上,放在一邊。然后他挪了挪椅子,以便可以面朝阿德爾海德??铺氐难劬Ρ人倪€要大,但更沉穩(wěn),他的嘴巴也顯得更堅毅。

“你可真漂亮!”他說。

她輕輕地笑了幾聲,拉起科特的手,吻了吻,說道:

“你可真迷人!”

說完這句,阿德爾海德又開始走來走去??铺貏t伸直了腿坐在那里,頭靠在椅子上,但眼睛卻一直注視著阿德爾海德。阿德爾海德有時會停下腳步,擺弄她的禮裙,或用手指滑過鋼琴琴鍵,隨后她又穿過開著的門走到外面陽臺上。此刻,科特無法從他的位置看到阿德爾海德,但她裙子的白色拖尾留在了屋內(nèi),他轉(zhuǎn)而注視著它。

不久,阿德爾海德返回屋里,坐在另外一把椅子的扶手上,晃著她的腳。

“我不喜歡你精神這么亢奮,阿德爾海德?!笨铺卣f。

她的眼睛閃著光,她注視著壁爐,壁爐里有根木頭正燒得旺。

“你應(yīng)該喝杯酒,科特?!?/p>

“我不稀罕酒?!?/p>

“我也不稀罕。但是我喜歡它能提神。它能使人快活,讓萬物都變得那么迷人?!?/p>

“你喝酒了嗎?”

“可是,科特,為什么你這么問?”

“因為你現(xiàn)在這么快活,而我又這么迷人?!?/p>

阿德爾海德向科特走去,將她的臉頰靠在他的頭發(fā)上,說道:

“為了我,不要毀了這一刻。你總是能用一個詞就毀掉這樣的時刻,這是極大極大的罪惡。你說我很漂亮,我很高興,因為你會這樣想我,因為我會陪著你出門,因為你英俊瀟灑,而且屬于我。我們會遠離對方,但正是因為我們之間的一切,讓我們彼此更加親密。我們僅是對彼此點點頭——就像我們經(jīng)常做的那樣——就能知曉對方的想法?!?/p>

科特輕輕地掙脫了她的擁抱,說道:

“坐一會兒,跟我聊聊?!?/p>

阿德爾海德吻了吻科特,坐了下來,立刻忘記了剛才的消沉,眼睛又像之前那樣閃起亮光??铺負芘跔t里的余火,然后添了一根木頭。他們靜靜地坐著,看著木頭燃燒,煙纏繞著木頭,又緩緩上升。阿德爾海德的腳點著地毯,科特則用手遮住自己的眼睛,繼續(xù)他的思考。

“我大學第一年,”科特說道,“我們五人關(guān)系非常要好,每周六晚上都會見面。通常都是在我的房間,因為我可以承擔花費。我們就這樣坐著,喝酒,直到天亮,然后互相攙扶著回家?!?/p>

“那你們一定喝了很多酒!”

“我不清楚,可能很多。我們大聲講話,深入地交流。酒讓我們覺得自己更偉大、更勇敢,也更聰明。第二天,我們就很不一樣了,變得冷靜沉默多了。但是我們可以直視對方的眼睛,因為我們沒有做錯什么事情。我們是否允許自己沉迷于酒精而失去自控,這并不要緊。我們彼此熟悉,互相信任。”

阿德爾海德坐在那里,默默地看著講話的他。沉思中的科特不斷地往壁爐里加木頭,直到阿德爾海德拿走他手中的木頭,放在一邊。

“你會把房子點著的!”阿德爾海德說。

“人不應(yīng)該跟陌生人喝酒,”科特說道,“你知道,被剝得一干二凈是多么丟人的事情。而這就是會發(fā)生的事?!?/p>

“你說得就好像喝醉了是被脫光一樣?!?/p>

科特沒有注意阿德爾海德的話,繼續(xù)說道:

“人會自己寬衣解帶,會自己暴露自己??纯茨愕难劬湍愕男θ?。我親眼感受過:上百次,他們一絲不掛地坐在桌旁,暴露無遺?!?/p>

“這是在上流社會嗎,科特?”

“不然還能在哪兒?”

“我不明白?!彼f,“我不認識你說的那些人?!?/p>

“你今晚會見到他們,阿德爾海德。”

她不滿地聳了聳肩,腳輕叩著地毯。

“阿德爾海德?!?/p>

她望著他,眼神憂郁而慍怒。他拉起她的手,緊緊握著,“我在那些注視你的眼睛里看到過,阿德爾海德?!?/p>

她抽走了她的手,“這太可惡了,科特!”

她站起來,走向陽臺的門。他的目光緊隨著她移動,閃爍著微光,“阿德爾海德?!?/p>

她背對著他站著,倚在窗框上,戴上了手套。他微微前傾,用手抓緊了椅子的扶手,“我在你的眼睛里也看到了,阿德爾海德?!?/p>

她沒有動,也沒有說一個字。當戴好手套后,她拎起裙擺,走到陽臺上。

五月的風冷颼颼的,她穿著薄薄的禮裙,忍不住打了寒戰(zhàn)。路燈在薄霧中昏暗地發(fā)著光,眾多馬車從廣場穿過。她能聽到馬具上的鈴鐺叮當作響;車夫也在下面走來走去。

她轉(zhuǎn)了個身,站在窗戶那里,看著科特。他此時已將椅子移到了離壁爐更近的地方。她只能看到科特的一個肩膀和一只手臂,還有他那濃密的頭發(fā)和雙腿。

“馬車已經(jīng)到了?!彼f。

他站起來,走向她。

“請你別生我的氣,”他溫柔地說道,“我不太舒服?!?/p>

“你生病了嗎?”

“是的,也許……不,不是?!?/p>

“好吧,雖然我不情愿,但是我們可以待在家里。你已經(jīng)掃了我的興?!?/p>

“是嗎?”

“當然。為了你,我才打扮得如此漂亮,我是希望跟你一起出去?!?/p>

“是嗎?”

他握住她的手,將她拉向壁爐,“坐下,阿德爾海德,好啦,就一分鐘。我們今晚能不能待在家里,喝點兒酒,自己歡樂一番?”

“好吧,你心情很不錯!”

“聽話,阿德爾海德。你是我唯一的放縱,你知道你是,那數(shù)百個歡樂的日子足以證明這一點。如果今晚你跟我想的一樣,我們就來證明這點。我們會為彼此美好,我們的眼睛會為彼此閃光?!?/p>

阿德爾海德并沒有看科特,但她搖了搖頭。

“我會待在家里,如果你希望這樣?!彼f。

他們靜靜地坐著。壁爐臺上的蠟燭在過堂風中搖曳不定。

“好奇怪,”他說,“你記得在倫敦的那個夜晚嗎,阿德爾海德?那晚我們要去參加那個盛大的舞會。那時我求你待在家里,你答應(yīng)了,而且很開心?!?/p>

阿德爾海德深深地陷入她的椅子里,手臂搭在脖子后面。

“那晚我并不開心?!彼f道。

他抬起頭,聽她要說什么。

“我屈服了,科特,但我并不樂意那樣做。我在假裝高興,為了你?!?/p>

他們看向彼此。阿德爾海德的眼神安靜、哀傷,她注視著科特說道:

“我那時很邪惡,科特。我心里恨你,對你撒了謊。當我坐在你身邊,握著你的手,開心地笑的時候,我內(nèi)心想的都是在舞會上跳舞,一小時接著一小時地跳舞?!?/p>

阿德爾海德從扶手椅上滑了下來,依偎著科特,雙手抱著科特的膝蓋,眼神謙卑地注視著他的臉說:

“不要用那么陌生的眼光看我,科特。那是我本來的樣子。我愛你。但是我生活里不能沒有其他人,我需要他們看到,看到我的快樂。我想要漂亮,想要他們都愛上我,而我屬于你。只有我在被愛的時候我才想要美麗。哦,不要有那樣的表情,科特?!?/p>

她緊緊地貼著科特,眼神里充滿了乞求。

“我并不邪惡,科特,對嗎?當我們的小寶貝生病的時候,我也日日夜夜都陪伴著他,難道不是嗎,科特?”

“是的?!彼f。

“沒錯,我的確在他身邊。但我不能總是保持安靜?!?/p>

科特將阿德爾海德從椅子上扶起來,手攬著她的腰穿過屋子,走到陽臺。此時,一輛馬車正迅速地穿過廣場,不久,許多馬車出現(xiàn)在廣場上。這些馬車從街道的各個方向涌來,但都朝著一個方向奔去,消失在街道的拐角處。馬蹄踏在路面上發(fā)出咔嗒咔嗒的聲響,路燈照著馬車閃閃發(fā)光,車夫和男仆筆直地坐在他們的車廂上。

“走吧,阿德爾海德,”科特說道,“我們出發(fā)吧?!?/p>

爐架上的蠟燭燃盡了,巨大的椅子上,那些雕刻的臉龐在黑暗中開心地笑著。天色變暗,老仆人來到屋里,整理了房間。夜晚降臨時,老仆人在屋里點燃了蠟燭。

老仆人日復一日地做著相同的工作。太陽升起,太陽落下。噴泉里的水花飛濺。路燈點亮,人們成群結(jié)隊地走過廣場。陽臺上的紅花鮮艷明亮,每個晚上,燈光穿過開著的門灑滿房間。

但夏天過后,沒有人再進入這間屋子。

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