書蟲6級《白衣女人》9．墓碑

9．The gravestone

On 13th October 1850 I left the wild forests of Central America and returned to England. I had escaped death by disease, death by war, and death by drowning, and hoped that these experiences had strengthened me to face my future — a future without Laura Fairlie. I still remembered her as Laura Fairlie, and could not think of her by her husband's name.

The first thing I did was to visit my mother and sister in their Hampstead cottage. The joy of our meeting, however, soon turned to sadness. I have no secrets from my mother, and when I saw the loving pity in her eyes, I feared the worst.

The news was soon told. I tried hard not to let my sorrow spoil the happiness of my return for my mother and sister, but by the third day I knew I had to go away alone for a while.

Let me go up to Limmeridge,' I begged my mother. 'I can bear it better when I have seen her grave.'

It was a warm autumn afternoon when I arrived at the station and walked down the familiar road, seeing in the distance the high white walls of Limmeridge House. In the churchyard I found the grave and knelt down beside the gravestone, closing my eyes.

Oh my love! My Love! My dear, dear Love!

Hours passed, and the evening sunlight threw long shadows among the sleeping places of the dead. I had lost all sense of time, kneeling there. Then, in the silence, I heard the soft sound of footsteps on the grass.

I looked up.

Beyond me, standing together by the churchyard wall, were two women, their veils down, hiding their faces. They were looking towards the grave, looking towards me.

Two.

They came closer, and stopped. One of them lifted her veil, and in the still evening light I saw the face of Marian Halcombe. A changed face. Thin and pale, full of pain and fear.

The woman with the veiled face came towards me slowly. Marian Halcombe sank to her knees, murmuring, 'Oh God, help him! Please, please help him, God!'

The veiled woman came on, slowly and silently. I looked at her — at her, and at no one else, from that moment. She had possession of me, body and soul. She stopped by the side of the gravestone, and we stood face to face with the grave between us.

Oh God, help him, help him!'

The woman lifted her veil.

In Loving Memory of Laura, Lady Glyde...

Laura, Lady Glyde, was standing by the gravestone, looking at me over her grave.

*　　*　　*

A life suddenly changed. A new future before me, like the sunlit view from a mountain top. I leave my story in the quiet shadow of Limmeridge church, and begin again, one week later, in the noise and rush of a London street.

I have rented rooms under a different name. Marian and Laura, using the same name, are said to be my sisters. I earn our bread by doing drawings for cheap magazines. We employ no servant; my elder sister, Marian, does the housework with her own hands. Marian and I are known to be the friends of mad Anne Catherick (address unknown), who falsely claims the identity of Lady Glyde. To the rest of the world, Laura, Lady Glyde, is dead. Dead to her uncle, who has refused to recognize her; dead to the lawyers, who have passed her fortune to her husband and aunt.

But to Marian and me she is alive! Penniless and sadly changed — her beauty faded, her mind confused — but alive, with her poor drawing teacher to fight her battles and to win her way back to the world of living beings. She is mine at last — mine to support, to protect, to defend. And mine to love.

* * *

drown v. to kill by submerging and suffocating in liquid 淹死；溺死

strengthen v. make stronger 變得堅強

veil n. a piece of fabric attached to a woman's hat 面紗

earn one's bread earn one's living 維持生計

penniless adj. having no money 身無分文的

9．墓碑

1850年10月13日我離開中美洲的原始森林，回到了英國。我一次次逃過疾病、戰(zhàn)爭和洪水帶來的死亡危險。我希望這些經(jīng)歷能夠使我更加堅強地面對未來——沒有勞拉的未來。在我心里她依然是勞拉·費爾利，我無法把她冠以她丈夫的姓氏。

我回來后的第一件事是到漢普斯特德看望母親和妹妹。歡聚的快樂很快轉(zhuǎn)化為悲傷。我沒有任何秘密瞞著母親，從她充滿愛憐和同情的眼光里，我預感到最壞的事情發(fā)生了。

她們把消息告訴了我。我盡最大努力不讓自己的悲哀破壞我回家?guī)Ыo母親和妹妹的喜悅。但是，回來的第三天，我覺得必須一個人離開一段時間。

“讓我到利默里奇去一趟吧，”我懇求著母親，“看到她的墳墓，我可以更好地接受這一切?！?/p>

那是一個秋日的午后，天氣很暖和，我到達目的地車站，走在熟悉的大路上，望著遠處利默里奇莊園的白色高墻。在教堂墓地里，我找到了勞拉的墓，在她的墓碑前跪下來，閉上了雙眼。

噢，我的愛人！我的愛人！我最親愛的人！

幾個小時過去了，落日的余輝在死者的安息地投下長長的影子。我跪在那里，完全沒有了時間概念。這時，寂靜中傳來人走在草地上的腳步聲。

我抬起頭來。

不遠處，教堂墓地的圍墻邊站著兩個女人，面紗遮住了她們的臉。她們正朝墓地張望，正朝我張望。

兩個女人。

她們朝我走來。其中一個掀起了面紗，借著僅有的一點兒光線，我看出那是瑪麗安·哈爾庫姆小姐。她的臉變得跟從前不一樣了：清瘦而蒼白，充滿了痛苦和恐懼。

頭戴面紗的女人緩慢地向我走來?，旣惏病す枎炷饭蛳聛?，輕聲說：“噢，上帝，幫幫他吧，幫幫他吧，上帝！”

頭戴面紗的女人向我走來，緩慢地，無言地向我走來。我注視著她——目不轉(zhuǎn)睛地久久注視著她。她占據(jù)了我的一切，我的靈魂和肉體。她在墓碑前停住腳步，我們隔著墳墓互相注視著。

“噢，上帝，幫幫他，幫幫他吧！”

那個女人掀起了面紗。

愛妻勞拉·格萊德夫人之墓……

勞拉·格萊德夫人，她就站在墓碑旁，隔著墳墓望著我。

*　　*　　*

生活突然間變了。一個嶄新的未來展現(xiàn)在我的面前，就像在山頂上看到的撒滿陽光的景色。我把過去的故事留在了利默里奇教堂那寂靜的陰影中，一星期后在喧鬧、繁忙的倫敦開始了新的生活。

我換了一個姓氏租了房子?，旣惏埠蛣诶灿猛瑯拥男帐?，對外人就說是我的姐妹。我靠給廉價雜志畫畫維持生計。我們沒有請仆人，我的姐姐，瑪麗安親自做家務。我和瑪麗安對外就說是瘋女人安妮·凱瑟里克（住址不詳）的朋友，那瘋女人總說自己是格萊德夫人。對世界上其他人來說，勞拉·格萊德夫人已經(jīng)死了；對拒不承認她的叔叔，她已經(jīng)死了；對把她的財產(chǎn)轉(zhuǎn)給她丈夫和姑媽的律師，她也已經(jīng)死了。

但是對于瑪麗安和我，她還活著！她身無分文，人也變了——她的美麗在消逝，頭腦一片混亂——但她還活著，她那可憐的繪畫教師要為她奮爭，使她重新回到真實的生活中來。她終于屬于我了——由我供養(yǎng)、呵護、保護，由我所愛。