剔牙、削皮、洗牛仔褲……這15件事你可別再做了！
If you've ever washed out a wound with saline instead of tap water or requested an x-ray for lower-back pain, you're a fool. Here are 15 more things you shouldn't bother doing.
如果你曾用鹽水而不是自來水洗傷口，或者腰背疼就要求拍X光，那你就太傻了。下面的這15件事，你以后也別費(fèi)力氣做了。
1 Eating five portions of fruit and vegetables a day
第一件事：每天吃五份蔬果。
The British government advises that we each eat five portions of fruit and vegetables a day. In Denmark, it's six. In Australia, it's seven. In 2014, campaigners tried upping it to 10. Just eat some vegetables and be done with it.
英國政府建議每人每天吃五份蔬果。丹麥政府則建議每天六份。澳大利亞政府建議的是每天七份。2014年，一些權(quán)益人士想要增加到每天十份。沒必要這樣，每天吃一些蔬菜就可以了。
2 Taking vitamin C supplements
第二件事：吃維C營養(yǎng)片。
If you feel a cold coming on, it's pointless to reach for the vitamin C tablets. Study after study has concluded that – unless you live in a frozen wilderness, smoke an incredibly large number of cigarettes or subject yourself to extreme physical stress on a regular basis – vitamin C won't do anything.
當(dāng)你覺得自己有要感冒的跡象，這時服用維生素C片根本沒用。許許多多的研究已經(jīng)得出結(jié)論，除非你住在冰天雪地的荒野，或者是煙癮纏身，又或是頻繁進(jìn)行極高強(qiáng)度的體能消耗，否則維他命C對你來說是完全沒用的。
3 Flossing
第三件事：剔牙。
In August, the British Dental Association's scientific adviser declared flossing to be pointless, adding that all floss-based studies of the past 25 years have been of "very low quality". If you've never flossed your teeth, you were right all along. Go out there today and flash the world that foul-smelling, grey-green smile of yours. You've earned this.
2016年8月，英國牙科協(xié)會的科學(xué)顧問稱，用牙線剔牙是沒有用的，還補(bǔ)充道，過去25年做出的剔牙研究，質(zhì)量堪憂。如果你從來沒有剔過牙，那你一直以來都做對了。不如今天出門對著大家微笑，哪怕你有口臭，牙齒又不白。自信笑容，你值得擁有。
4 Washing your jeans
第四件事：洗牛仔褲。
The sensible thing to do with dirty clothes is to wash them. But the CEO of Levi's has advised that you should never do so with jeans, because washing them makes them look bad. Instead, why not try rubbing off stains with a toothbrush, leaving them to air outside and never having any friends because you smell of dirt and sweat?
正常人都會把臟衣服洗干凈。但是李維斯牛仔褲品牌的CEO卻建議我們永遠(yuǎn)不要洗牛仔褲，因為洗了之后褲子就不好看了。倒不如試著用牙刷刷掉污漬，直接把褲子晾起來，然后再也不結(jié)交任何朋友，因為你身上散發(fā)出塵土和汗水的臭味。
5 Having a landline
第五件事：裝固定電話。
No one calls your landline telephone. You never call anyone's landline. No one will have a landline at all 10 years from now. They exist purely to complicate the act of changing your broadband provider.
沒人會打你的固定電話，而且你也從來不會去打別人的固話。十年后估計也不會再有人用固定電話了。固話存在的意義，只不過是要讓你換寬帶供應(yīng)商變得很麻煩而已。
6 Drinking eight glasses of water a day
第六件事：每天喝八杯水。
You don't need to drink eight glasses of water a day. The figure first appeared in a recommended dietary allowance guide in the US 70 years ago, and it doesn't take into consideration your age, your height, your weight or your activity level. Instead, just drink until your wee is no longer dark. That means you're hydrated.
人不需要每天喝八杯水。70年前，“八杯水”這個數(shù)值首次出現(xiàn)在美國一本廣受推崇的膳食攝入指南里面?？墒沁@個數(shù)據(jù)并沒有考慮到不同人的年齡、體重和運(yùn)動量等指標(biāo)。其實只要喝水喝到尿液顏色變淺，那就證明你喝夠水了。
7 Overusing your fridge
第七件事：濫用冰箱。
Don't put tomatoes in your fridge, because it stops them tasting of anything. Don't put potatoes in your fridge, because it will muck up their starch and make them taste funny. Don't put bread in the fridge, because it will go stale faster. Don't put onions in the fridge, because they need to be well ventilated. Don't put bananas in the fridge, because they're tropical fruits. Don't put avocado in the fridge, because they will never ripen. Don't put ketchup in the fridge, because it doesn't need to be kept in the fridge.
不要把番茄放進(jìn)冰箱，因為這樣吃起來就沒番茄味了。不要把土豆放進(jìn)冰箱，因為這樣容易破壞淀粉，吃起來味道會怪怪的。不要放把面包放進(jìn)冰箱，因為這樣會更快變質(zhì)。不要把洋蔥放進(jìn)冰箱，因為洋蔥需要良好的通風(fēng);不要把香蕉放進(jìn)冰箱，因為香蕉是熱帶水果;不要把鱷梨放進(jìn)冰箱，因為這樣鱷梨就不會熟了;也不要把番茄醬放進(jìn)冰箱，因為番茄醬不需要放進(jìn)冰箱。
8 Washing your hair every day
第八件事：每天洗頭。
Nobody in the history of the world washed their hair as much as we do now. Daily washing is thought to be unnecessary. Every couple of days is good, or less if your hair is curly. Or never at all, if you want people to avoid you like the plague.
縱觀世界歷史，沒有人比我們現(xiàn)在的洗頭頻率更加頻繁了。每天洗頭被認(rèn)為是沒有必要的。其實隔幾天洗一次就行了。如果你是卷毛的話，還可以適當(dāng)減少洗頭次數(shù)。如果你不怕別人像躲瘟疫一樣躲你的話，一輩子都不洗也沒關(guān)系。
9 Peeling vegetables
第九件事：給蔬菜削皮。
Most of a vegetable's insoluble fibre is in its peel. Stop throwing away delicious fibre.
大多數(shù)蔬菜的不可溶性纖維都在皮里面。所以別再扔掉“甘美”的纖維了。
10 Ordering anything in the top-right-hand corner of a menu
第十件事：點菜單右上角的菜
Menu design is a skill rooted in complex psychology. Knowing that your eye will naturally fall on the top-right corner of the menu, this is where restaurateurs often place their most profitable items. Why not help run these crooks out of business by ordering from the bottom of the menu, where you'll find items with smaller margins?
菜單設(shè)計很有技術(shù)含量地應(yīng)用了復(fù)雜的心理學(xué)原理。餐廳老板知道你的視線會自然而然地往菜單的右上角看，因此他們常常把利潤最大的菜品放在這個位置。我們不妨破壞這個小詭計，點菜單底部利潤較少的菜吧。
11 Discarding out-of-date food
第十一件事：丟掉過期食品。
When food reaches its sell-by date, that doesn't mean it suddenly becomes poisonous – it means that the supermarket has guessed this stock should be rotated. Unless it smells terrible or is covered in mould, you're probably fine.
過了保質(zhì)期的食物，不是說它突然就有毒了，而是說超市預(yù)先已經(jīng)決定要把這批食物換下架了。如果食物沒有變味，表面沒有發(fā)霉的話，吃了過期食品也沒關(guān)系。
12 Buying antivirus software
第十二件事：購買殺毒軟件。
Earlier this year, the US Department of Homeland Security's computer-emergency readiness team issued a warning about a popular brand of antivirus software after finding that it contained "critical vulnerabilities". Most browsers now have content-verification systems that do the job better.
今年早些時候，美國國土安全部計算機(jī)應(yīng)急準(zhǔn)備小組發(fā)現(xiàn)某知名殺毒軟件品牌含有致命漏洞，并在此后發(fā)表了一則警告。其實現(xiàn)在很多瀏覽器自帶的內(nèi)容識別系統(tǒng)甚至比這些殺毒軟件做得更好。
13 Buying unnecessary products
第十三件事：買下沒必要買的東西。
Why buy air freshener when you can just fill an orange peel with salt? Why use rinse aid in a dishwasher when you can just use white vinegar? Why buy deodorant when you can just rub coconut oil and baking powder on your armpits?
既然可以把鹽倒在橘子皮里自制清新劑，那干嘛還要花冤枉錢買空氣清新劑呢?既然用白醋就可以清理干凈洗碗機(jī)，那干嘛還要花冤枉錢買漂洗劑呢?既然用椰子油和發(fā)酵粉就能去除腋下體味，那為什么要買除臭劑呢?
14 Learning to drive
第十四件事：學(xué)開車。
The driverless car revolution is only a few years away. You can get the bus until then.
幾年之后，無人駕駛汽車革命肯定就開始了。在那之前，你坐公交車不就行了。
15 Reading the news
第十五件事：看新聞。
According to Professor Graham Davey, consuming a non-stop torrent of negative news stories can significantly contribute to the deterioration of your mood, and to the development of depression, anxiety, stress and PTSD. This article does not count as negative news and has therefore saved your life. Please thank me accordingly.
雷厄姆•戴維教授指出，連續(xù)不斷地閱讀負(fù)面新聞消息會明顯地破壞原本的心情，甚至還會產(chǎn)生抑郁、焦慮、壓力和創(chuàng)傷后應(yīng)激障礙等不良后果。幸好，這篇文章不算是負(fù)面新聞。這么說來我可救了你一命哦。所以你們可以盡情感謝我了。
