男生女生的友誼竟然這么不一樣

You may have heard the saying, women are from Venus and men are from Mars. It’s a nice way of saying how males and females are, in many ways, quite different from each other.

你或許聽(tīng)過(guò)“女人來(lái)自金星，男人來(lái)自火星”這句話。這句話很好地道出了男性和女性在許多方面上有著天壤之別。

These differences can be seen everywhere, even in how we communicate with friends. A recent study by the University of Oxford suggested that males and females keep long-distance relationships with friends of the same sex alive in different ways.

這些區(qū)別隨處可見(jiàn)，甚至我們和朋友溝通的方式都有所不同。牛津大學(xué)近期發(fā)布的一項(xiàng)研究表明，男性和女性會(huì)用不同的方式來(lái)維系與異地同性朋友間的友情。

Researchers questioned 30 students about their friendships just before they graduated from high school and moved away for college. They then followed up the questions nine months, and then 18 months, later.

研究者們?cè)?0名學(xué)生即將高中畢業(yè)，邁入大學(xué)校園之際，詢問(wèn)了他們關(guān)于友誼的問(wèn)題，并在9個(gè)月和18個(gè)月后對(duì)這些問(wèn)題分別進(jìn)行了跟進(jìn)。

Robin Dunbar, who headed the research, told The Guardian: “What determined whether [friendships] survived with girls was whether they made an effort to talk more to each other on the phone.”

牽頭這項(xiàng)研究的羅賓·鄧巴在接受《衛(wèi)報(bào)》采訪時(shí)表示：“女生之間維系友誼的因素是兩人是否能盡量煲更長(zhǎng)時(shí)間的電話粥。”

Males, on the other hand, tended to do things differently. Most male respondents said they get through months of being apart from friends by arranging occasional meet-ups. “What held up their friendships was doing stuff together,” Dunbar told The Guardian.

而男性處理這些事情的方式則截然不同。大多數(shù)男性受訪者表示，他們會(huì)安排不定期的聚會(huì)，這中間他們要有好幾個(gè)月天各一方。“他們維系友誼的方式是一起干點(diǎn)事兒，”鄧巴在接受《衛(wèi)報(bào)》采訪時(shí)表示。

“Going to a football match, going to the pub for a drink ... They had to make the effort. It was a very striking sex difference.”

“去看場(chǎng)足球比賽，去酒吧喝一杯……他們需要努力做到這些。這是十分顯著的性別差異。”

Of course, genderisn’t the only thing that determines how we stay in touch. The way we keep our relationships alive comes down entirely to the preference of each person, and it can take a while to find your own way of making your friendships work. One thing that is definitely clear though is that friends who make the effort to stay in contact, even if it’s only through Skype once a week, do tend to stay friends, no matter what the distance.

當(dāng)然，性別并非是決定我們?nèi)绾伪３致?lián)系的唯一要素。我們維系關(guān)系的方式完全取決于每個(gè)人的不同偏好，找到自己維系好友誼的方式你或許要花上一段時(shí)間。但有一點(diǎn)是明確的，努力保持聯(lián)系的朋友，就算只是每周視頻聊天一次也能做朋友，不論距離有多遠(yuǎn)。