Mother's Hands　母親的手

Mother's Hands　母親的手

◎ Louisa Godissart McQuillen

Night after night, she came to tuck me in, even long after my childhood years. Following her longstanding custom, she’d lean down and push my long hair out of the way, then kiss my forehead.

在我的童年時(shí)期，很長(zhǎng)一段時(shí)間里，每個(gè)夜里，母親總習(xí)慣來(lái)為我掖住被角，撩開(kāi)我的長(zhǎng)頭發(fā)，親吻我的額頭。

I don’t remember when it first started annoying me—her hands pushing my hair that way. But it did annoy me, for they felt work-worn and rough against my young skin. Finally, one night, I shouted out at her, “Don’t do that anymore—your hands are too rough!” She didn’t say anything in reply. But never again did my mother close out my day with that familiar expression of her love.

不記得從何時(shí)起，我開(kāi)始討厭她用手撥開(kāi)我的頭發(fā)。這確實(shí)很讓我惱火，因?yàn)槟赣H粗糙的雙手讓我感覺(jué)自己幼滑的肌膚在受到傷害。終于，一天晚上，我沖她嚷道：“別再這樣了——你的手太粗糙了！”她什么也沒(méi)說(shuō)。但母親再也沒(méi)有像這樣對(duì)我表達(dá)她的愛(ài)。

Time after time, with the passing years, my thoughts returned to that night. By then I missed my mother’s hands, missed her goodnight kiss on my forehead. Sometimes the incident seemed very close, sometimes far away. But always it lurked, in the back of my mind.

一次又一次，隨著歲月的流逝，我的思緒又回到了那個(gè)晚上。我想念那時(shí)母親的手，想念她晚上留在我額頭上的親吻。有時(shí)這幕情景似乎很近，有時(shí)又似乎很遙遠(yuǎn)。但它總是埋藏在我心底，時(shí)常浮現(xiàn)在我的腦海里。

Well, the years have passed, and I’m not a little girl anymore. Mom is in her mid-seventies, and those hands I once thought to be so rough are still doing things for me and my family. She’s been our doctor, reaching into a medicine cabinet for the remedy to calm a young girl’s stomach or soothe the boy’s scraped knee. She cooks the best fried chicken in the world... gets stains out of blue jeans like I never could...

多年之后，我不再是昨天的那個(gè)小女孩了。但是現(xiàn)在75歲的母親仍舊用她那雙粗糙的雙手照顧著家人和我。母親曾是我們的醫(yī)生，她可以從容冷靜地從醫(yī)藥箱拿出胃藥，治好小女孩的胃痛或給小男孩擦傷的膝蓋上敷藥。她燒的炸雞是世界上最美味的……也可以弄干凈我怎么都不能洗干凈的藍(lán)色牛仔褲……

Now, my own children are grown and gone. Mom no longer has Dad, and on special occasions, I find myself drawn next door to spend the night with her. So it was late on Thanksgiving Eve, as I slept in the bedroom of my youth, a familiar hand hesitantly ran across my face to brush the hair from my forehead. Then a kiss, ever so gently, touched my brow.

現(xiàn)在，我的孩子已經(jīng)長(zhǎng)大了，搬離到了另外的城市。父親也離開(kāi)母親去了天堂，在特殊的節(jié)日里，我經(jīng)常會(huì)陪母親度過(guò)。所以在這個(gè)感恩節(jié)前夕，我睡在我小時(shí)候睡過(guò)的臥室里，感覺(jué)到一只那么熟悉的手熟練地梳理我前額上的頭發(fā)。然后輕輕落下一個(gè)吻，永遠(yuǎn)這樣溫柔，撫摸我的眉毛。

In my memory, for the thousandth time, I recalled the night my young voice complained, “Don’t do that anymore—your hands are too rough!” Catching Mom’s hand in hand, I blurted out how sorry I was for that night. I thought she’d remember, as I did. But Mom didn’t know what I was talking about. She had forgotten—and forgiven—long ago.

在記憶中，我曾無(wú)數(shù)次回想起那晚我年幼的抱怨聲：“別再這樣了——你的手太粗糙了！”我一把抓住母親的手，脫口而出：“我多么后悔那天晚上對(duì)您講過(guò)的話(huà)。”我以為她和我一樣一直記得。但母親不知道我在說(shuō)什么。她很久以前就忘了，就已經(jīng)原諒了我。

That night, I fell asleep with a new appreciation for my gentle mother and her caring hands. And the guilt that I had carried around for so long was nowhere to be found.

那天晚上，我睡著了，我對(duì)媽媽那雙溫柔而體貼的雙手有了一種新的感激之情。而這么多年來(lái)，壓在我心頭的負(fù)罪感，也突然無(wú)處可尋。

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