你們?cè)?jīng)是同事。現(xiàn)在你是老板了
One day you're work buddies. Then, one of you gets promoted. What happens to the relationship?
你們?cè)?jīng)是同事。然后,你們其中的一個(gè)升職了。這段關(guān)系會(huì)變得怎么樣?
When one person gets elevated, it throws off the power balance of a relationship and people have to readjust.
當(dāng)一個(gè)人升職,就會(huì)打破一段關(guān)系的權(quán)力平衡,人們不得不重新調(diào)整。
"In the workplace among peers, there is a sense of equality that we are all in this together," said Rebecca Chory, an associate professor at Frostburg State University who studies organizational behavior and workplace relationships. "But when one person moves up, the equality part is no longer there."
弗羅斯特堡州立大學(xué)研究組織行為和職場關(guān)系的副教授麗貝卡·科里說:“在工作場所,我們都在一起,同事之間有一種平等的感覺。”“但當(dāng)一個(gè)人升職時(shí),平等的部分就不復(fù)存在了。”
Talk to your peers
跟你的同事談?wù)劙?/strong>
The relationship is going to change when one person gets promoted — there's no denying that. The key is to recognize the shift and map out a plan to move forward.
當(dāng)一個(gè)人得到提升時(shí),你們的關(guān)系就會(huì)發(fā)生變化——這是不可否認(rèn)的。關(guān)鍵是要認(rèn)識(shí)到這種轉(zhuǎn)變,并制定出改善的計(jì)劃。
Have a frank — and likely a little uncomfortable — conversation about what has happened and what happens next.
就已經(jīng)發(fā)生的事情和接下來將要發(fā)生的事情進(jìn)行一次坦率的——可能有點(diǎn)不舒服的——談話。
"As a new manager, you have to remember that you are no longer peers," said Amy Cooper Hakim, an industrial-organizational psychology practitioner and workplace expert.
行業(yè)組織心理學(xué)家、職場專家艾米•庫珀•哈基姆表示:“作為一名新經(jīng)理,你必須記住,你們已經(jīng)不再是同事。”
Be aware that even if one person in the relationship wasn't looking to get promoted, there will likely be some negative feelings, including jealousy.
要知道,即使這段關(guān)系中有一個(gè)人不想升職,也可能會(huì)有一些負(fù)面情緒,包括嫉妒。
"The only way those negative emotions can be quelled is by talking them through," said Denise Dudley, a behavioral psychologist.
行為心理學(xué)家丹尼斯·達(dá)德利說:“平息這些負(fù)面情緒的唯一方法就是把它們說出來。”
Lead by example
以身作則
As the new manager, you set the tone of how the new relationship will work with your former peers.
作為新經(jīng)理,你決定了將如何與前同事共事的新關(guān)系。
And don't get fooled into acting tough to gain respect, warned Cooper Hakim.
庫柏·哈基姆警告說,不要被愚弄而采取強(qiáng)硬的行動(dòng)來贏得尊重。
"It doesn't work. Lead by example by being positive and friendly, with a kind tone while still holding people accountable."
“這是行不通的。要以身作則,表現(xiàn)得積極、友好、語氣友善,同時(shí)仍要讓人們負(fù)起責(zé)任。”
Find a new sounding board
找一個(gè)新的傾聽者
We all need someone at work to bounce ideas off of. But when you get promoted, it's a good idea to find a new confidant.
我們都需要有人在工作中給我們出主意。但是當(dāng)你升職的時(shí)候,找一個(gè)新的知己是個(gè)好主意。
"That could mean you cultivate a new relationship with another manager," said Dudley.
“這可能意味著你要和另一位經(jīng)理建立一種新的關(guān)系,”達(dá)德利說。
You will likely be privy to more projects and confidential information that shouldn't be discussed.
你可能會(huì)知道更多不應(yīng)該被討論的項(xiàng)目和機(jī)密信息。
"You are now the manager and have certain tasks and obligations to the organization," said Cooper Hakim.
哈基姆說:“你現(xiàn)在是經(jīng)理,對(duì)公司負(fù)有一定的任務(wù)和義務(wù)。
Know that people are watching
要知道大家都在看著你
People are going to assume there will be some favoritism, so try to avoid giving any impression that could be happening.
人們會(huì)認(rèn)為會(huì)有偏袒,所以盡量避免給人留下任何可能發(fā)生的偏袒某人的印象。
"In general, you are likely not going to hang out in the same way before the promotion, it just gets very sticky," said Cooper Hakim.
庫柏·哈基姆說:“一般來說,你不太可能以升職前的方式出去玩,那種情況會(huì)變得非常棘手。”
That means cutting back on the private chit-chats you used to have in the kitchen to avoid any perception of partiality.
這意味著減少你過去在廚房里的私人閑聊的時(shí)間,以避免任何偏見的感覺。
"No matter what, people will be looking for ways you are practicing favoritism," said Dudley. "You have to ride that through by being so fair and objective that people eventually settle down."
達(dá)德利說:“無論如何,人們會(huì)尋找你偏袒別人的行為。“你必須做到公正客觀,讓人們最終安定下來。”
Friends should also note that just because they are close with the now-manager, that doesn't mean they should be asking for any favors or expect special treatment.
朋友們也應(yīng)該注意到,僅僅因?yàn)樗麄兣c現(xiàn)任經(jīng)理關(guān)系好,并不意味著他們應(yīng)該要求任何幫助或期待特殊待遇。
The friendship can end
結(jié)束這段友誼
Sometimes, a friendship won't be able to survive one person's move up the org chart -- and that's OK.
有時(shí)候,一段友誼不可能在一個(gè)人升職后繼續(xù)存在——這沒關(guān)系。
"The friendship may fall apart and break up, and in some ways, that solves a lot of the problem," said Chory. "You won't have the tension if you aren't as friendly and disengage."
科里說:“這段友誼可能會(huì)破裂,在某種程度上,這解決了很多問題。”“如果你不那么友好,不那么投入,你就不會(huì)感到緊張。”