什么時(shí)候?yàn)樽约涸O(shè)定高期望值是好的?

什么時(shí)候?yàn)樽约涸O(shè)定高期望值是好的?

The setting of expectations is highly personal. Rule No. 1 is to not set them for others over whom you have no control. When people disappoint you, it’s usually because you set unreasonable expectations for them.

期望的設(shè)定是非常個(gè)人化的。第一條規(guī)則是不要為你無(wú)法控制的人設(shè)置這些規(guī)則。當(dāng)人們讓你失望時(shí)，通常是因?yàn)槟憬o他們?cè)O(shè)定了不合理的期望。

Magical thinking leads to phenomenally high expectations, but does it work? Studies have shown it gives true believers more self-confidence which, in turn, can improve performance. But if you interpret it strictly—that simply thinking about an outcome causes it—you’ll be sadly mistaken.

神奇的想法會(huì)讓人產(chǎn)生超乎尋常的高期望，但它真的有效嗎?研究表明，它給真正的信徒更多的自信，反過(guò)來(lái)，可以提高表現(xiàn)。但是如果你嚴(yán)格地去理解它——僅僅是考慮結(jié)果——你就大錯(cuò)特錯(cuò)了。

Instead of magic, you should rely on setting high expectations for yourself where attainment would result in a meaningful improvement in your life. Situations that call for high expectations include:

不要依靠奇跡，你應(yīng)該給自己設(shè)定更高的期望，達(dá)到這些期望會(huì)給你的生活帶來(lái)有意義的改善。需要寄予厚望的情況包括:

1. Your Job

你的工作

Your job is one area of your life where you want to excel. You want to be better than others at what you do and to be rewarded for it. Striving for upward mobility prevents stagnation in your profession.

你的工作是你生活中可以出類(lèi)拔萃的一個(gè)領(lǐng)域。你想要在你所做的事情上比別人做得更好，并因此得到回報(bào)。努力向上可以防止你的職業(yè)停滯不前。

While having high expectations for yourself at work can be stressful, it can also make your job more engaging. Taking pride in your work, helping others grow, and delighting your clients are great ways to remind yourself why you do what you do. Providing value makes showing up to work every day fulfilling and worthwhile.

雖然在工作中對(duì)自己有很高的期望會(huì)給自己帶來(lái)壓力，但它也會(huì)讓你的工作更有吸引力。以你的工作為榮，幫助別人成長(zhǎng)，取悅你的客戶，這些都是提醒自己為什么要做這些事情的好方法。提供價(jià)值使每天的工作更充實(shí)，更有價(jià)值。

2. Your Health

你的健康

Nothing in life deserves higher expectations than your health. Without it, everything else in life will feel like a struggle. Setting high standards for your exercise, diet, and nutrition keeps you physically capable. Exercise daily, and make sure every meal includes a fruit and a vegetable.

生活中沒(méi)有什么比健康更值得期待的了。沒(méi)有它，生活中的其他一切都將感覺(jué)像一場(chǎng)斗爭(zhēng)。為你的鍛煉、飲食和營(yíng)養(yǎng)設(shè)定高標(biāo)準(zhǔn)，讓自己保持體力。每天鍛煉，確保每餐都有水果和蔬菜。

Treat your mental health the same way. Making time to meditate is a lot easier if you have high standards for your emotional well-being.

用同樣的方式對(duì)待你的心理健康。如果你對(duì)自己的情緒健康有很高的標(biāo)準(zhǔn)，騰出時(shí)間來(lái)冥想會(huì)容易得多。

Of course, there are some health issues people can’t avoid, like getting certain cancers or autoimmune diseases. But setting high goals for treating or managing them is still important for your quality of life.

當(dāng)然，有些健康問(wèn)題是人們無(wú)法避免的，比如某些癌癥或自身免疫性疾病。但是為治療或管理它們?cè)O(shè)定高目標(biāo)對(duì)你的生活質(zhì)量仍然很重要。

3. Your Treatment of Others

你對(duì)待別人的方式

Even if you’re not an avid reader of the Bible, you’ve probably heard of the “Golden Rule”: “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” Respect for others is one area where you should never make compromises.

即使你不是圣經(jīng)的狂熱讀者，你也可能聽(tīng)說(shuō)過(guò)“黃金法則”:“己所不欲，勿施于人。”“尊重他人是你永遠(yuǎn)不應(yīng)該妥協(xié)的一個(gè)方面。

Whoever you are, you owe others your time. Phil Stover, a venture capitalist and CEO of gaming community PvP.com, is unusual among VCs in his willingness to help entrepreneurs with things like pitch preparation.[2] While VCs are busy people, Phil knows the importance of treating others well.

不管你是誰(shuí)，你都欠別人時(shí)間。菲爾·斯托弗是一名風(fēng)險(xiǎn)投資家，也是游戲社區(qū)PvP.com的首席執(zhí)行官。在風(fēng)投界中，他與眾不同的地方在于，他愿意幫助創(chuàng)業(yè)者做一些事情，比如準(zhǔn)備投資項(xiàng)目。雖然風(fēng)投們都很忙，但菲爾知道善待他人的重要性。

Maintaining high expectations for how you treat others isn’t always easy. After all, there are a lot of people whose actions and words make it tough to respect them. Next time you have to deal with someone who’s being difficult, remember that respect is returned in the proportion it’s given.

對(duì)自己如何對(duì)待他人抱有高期望并不總是件容易的事。畢竟，有很多人的言行讓人很難尊重他們。下次當(dāng)你要和刁難你的人打交道時(shí)，記住尊重的回報(bào)是有比例的。

One of the best ways to earn others’ respect is to treat them with respect. Perhaps in the attempt, you will help someone else figure out the importance of holding others in high esteem.

贏得別人尊重的最好方法之一就是尊重別人。也許在這樣的嘗試中，你會(huì)幫助別人認(rèn)識(shí)到尊重他人的重要性。

What if you don’t quite measure up to your expectations for your job, your health, or your treatment of others? You would still have done better than if you had not. That alone is a reason to hold high standards. But sometimes, it’s okay to let them slip.

如果你在工作、健康或?qū)Υ朔矫鏇](méi)有達(dá)到自己的期望怎么辦?你還是會(huì)做得更好。這本身就是一個(gè)保持高標(biāo)準(zhǔn)的理由。但有時(shí)候，讓它們順其自然就好。