讀點(diǎn)好英文:The Woman in the Mirror　鏡中的女人

所屬教程:英語漫讀

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2022年02月25日

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The Woman in the Mirror　鏡中的女人

·Francis·

When I was 11，I found out I had a brain tumor. I had surgery to remove it, but the size and location of the tumor caused my optic nerve to atrophy.For three years afterward, I had partiaI sight, but my ophthalmologist told me that eventually I would go blind.At the end of my 14th year, doctors pronounced me legally blind and said there was nothing that could be done.I had a 5 percent chance of surviving the tumor, and I did, but somehow I could never deal with the fact that I was going blind.I tried to behave as if everything were just fine.When it happened, I was devastated.

My dad left us when I was 15，and I took that really hard. Because of that, and because I was blind on top of it, my greatest fear was that no one was ever going to love me, that I would never get married and have kids and a full life.I was afraid of being alone, and I guess that is what I thought blindness meant.

Ten years later, on Nov. 16 of last year, I was cooking dinner and leaned over to kiss my guide dog, Ami.I lost my balance and hit my head on the corner of my coffee table and then on the floor.It wasn't unusual.When you are blind, you hit yourself all the time.I got up, finished making dinner and went to bed.

When I woke up, I could see. Light was coming through my window, and the curtains were drawn.Of course, I was shocked, but not scared, not like when I lost my sight.There is a big mirror in my bedroom, but I didn't look at myself right away.I wanted to wash my hair and put on make-up first.I do not look good in the morning, and I didn't want to be frightened.As I was showering, I caught my reflection.And that just that left me speechless, really.

The last time I saw myself, I had short hair, a pale complexion and features that didn't show because I had such light eyebrows and eyelashes I looked awful, like a teenage girl, I suppose now, all of a sudden, I realized that it was true what people told me, that I was an attractive woman. When I stood in front of the mirror, I reached to touch my face.That is what I had been doing for 10 years-it was how I understood-so it was a natural impulse.It was not until I saw myself that I realized how much my memory had faded of things I once could see.It was about four hours before I told anyone.I stayed with Ami.We looked at each other and played outside in the yard.I just wanted to be alone, and take it in.It was so much.

The strange thing was that I knew it was going to happen. About a week before, I was walking Ami and suddenly saw blue dots in front of my left eye, the one I would regain my sight in.I told my mum because I found it funny；blue had been my favorite color and was the easiest color for me to see when I had partial sight.I took it as a sign.

People don't treat me differently now. I was always completely independent.I lived in Auckland, New Zealand, in my own flat with my dog.I would have parties and go clubbing：I would listen to the beat of the music and go with it and hope for the best.When your friends grab you and point you in the other direction because they are actually over there, that is when you remember you're blind.

I also loved movies. Going to the movies blind was like someone telling you a really good story with great sound effects, and you make up all the images in your head.I haven't been back since I regained my sight.But I've been able to see my favorite soap, Shortland Street.And my friends took out magazines and pointed out Pamela Lee Anderson and Brad Pitt.The biggest surprise was Brad Pitt.I just thought, what is everyone going on about?The best was seeing my boyfriend.He rode the ferry over, and I knew him the moment I saw him.He was as sexy as I had imagined.

I am not surprised that things are pretty much the same in my life. I didn't expect anything more than what I have now.I worked very hard to surround myself with genuine people and to create a normal life for myself.I am still the same person.It just means that physically, perhaps, I can share more and put the two together, the feelings I had, with sight.

The same doctor who told me I would never see again told me I had regained 80 percent of the vision in my left eye. To be able to look him in the eye and tell him I could see again-honestly, that felt pretty damn good.He ran all the tests and made me read the eye chart, but he has no explanation.He said himself, and still says, that once the optic nerve is damaged, it cannot regenerate.

I don't think the knock on the head had anything to do with it. If others want to believe that is how it happened, that is fine.But I consider this a miracIe.There is no other way to describe it.Some things just cannot be explained.Of course, some people are skeptical.For me, it is precious.I try not to think about the possibility of going blind again.But my recovery would be no less a miracle even if I lost my sight tomorrow.

弗蘭克思

十一歲那年，我被診斷患有腦瘤。手術(shù)切除了腦瘤，但腫瘤的大小和位置卻導(dǎo)致了我的視覺神經(jīng)萎縮。三年后，我還能看見一點(diǎn)點(diǎn)東西，但眼科醫(yī)生說我最終會(huì)失明?？爝^完十四歲時(shí)，醫(yī)生斷言我已經(jīng)完全失明，并且毫無辦法治療。當(dāng)時(shí)，我患上腦瘤后，存活的幾率只有5%，結(jié)果我活了下來，但對于即將失明的現(xiàn)實(shí)，我卻無能為力。我努力表現(xiàn)得一切正常，但當(dāng)它真正成為現(xiàn)實(shí)時(shí)，我卻絕望了。

十五歲那年，父親離開了我們，這簡直令我無法承受。正因?yàn)槿绱?，再加上處于失明最痛苦的時(shí)期，我最大的恐懼是沒有人再愛我，我永遠(yuǎn)都不能結(jié)婚，不能有自己的孩子和一個(gè)完整的生活。我害怕孤獨(dú)，我想，這些就是我當(dāng)時(shí)對失明的理解。

十年過去了，去年11月16日，我正在做晚餐，彎腰親吻我的導(dǎo)盲犬阿米時(shí)，突然失去重心，一頭撞在了咖啡桌的一角，然后又摔在地上。這沒什么大不了的，要是你失明了，你也總會(huì)撞傷自己。我爬起來，繼續(xù)做完晚餐，然后上床睡覺。

當(dāng)我醒來時(shí)，我能看見了！陽光從拉著窗簾的窗戶透進(jìn)來。當(dāng)然，我大吃一驚，但并不像失明時(shí)那樣恐慌。臥室里掛著一面大鏡子，我并沒有立刻去照。我想先洗頭，化妝，早晨的模樣并不好看，我不想讓自己受到驚嚇。洗澡的時(shí)候，我看見了自己的影子，頓時(shí)說不出話來，真的。

最后一次見到自己時(shí)，我留著短短的頭發(fā)，臉色蒼白，面容黯淡。因?yàn)槲业拿济徒廾己艿?，所以看起來像一個(gè)十幾歲的小女孩兒，糟糕極了。但是，現(xiàn)在，我突然意識(shí)到，別人跟我說的都是真的，我是一個(gè)漂亮的女人。我站在鏡子前，觸摸著自己的臉。十年來，我一直這樣做——我只是這樣理解的——所以這是一種自然沖動(dòng)。直到我看見自己，才意識(shí)到曾經(jīng)看見的記憶，已經(jīng)在很大程度上消退了。大約四小時(shí)后，我才告訴其他人。我和阿米在一起，我們注視著對方，在外面的院子里玩兒。我只想獨(dú)自接受這一事實(shí)，它對我的意義太大了。

奇怪的是，我很早就知道自己會(huì)復(fù)明。大概一個(gè)星期前，我?guī)е⒚咨⒉?，突然看見左眼前面有藍(lán)色的圓點(diǎn)。后來正是這只眼睛復(fù)明了。我告訴了媽媽，因?yàn)楹苡腥さ氖?，我一直最喜歡藍(lán)色，這也是我還有部分視力時(shí)最容易看到的顏色。我把它當(dāng)成了某種信號(hào)。

現(xiàn)在，我不再享有人們的特殊對待了，我一直獨(dú)立生活，帶著小狗住在新西蘭奧克蘭市自己的公寓里。我以前會(huì)參加聚會(huì)，去俱樂部玩兒，會(huì)聽著音樂，打著節(jié)拍，祈求最佳狀態(tài)。當(dāng)我和朋友們一起瘋玩兒時(shí)，只有當(dāng)他們抓住我的手，指著另一個(gè)方向，告訴我其實(shí)他們在那邊時(shí)，我才想起自己是個(gè)盲人。

我也喜歡看電影，盲人看電影就好像在聽別人給你講一個(gè)非常好的故事，伴著精彩的音響效果，你可以在腦海中想象所有的情形。自從復(fù)明后，我還沒有去看過電影，卻在看我最喜歡的肥皂劇《蘇特蘭街》。朋友們翻開雜志，指著帕梅拉·李·安德森和布拉德·皮特給我看，布拉德·皮特最令我吃驚，我只是想，他有什么值得人們反復(fù)談?wù)摰哪?？最美妙的事是見到我的男朋友。他坐渡船過來，我一眼就認(rèn)出了他，和我想象中的一樣性感。

我并不感到驚奇，生活還和以前一樣?，F(xiàn)在擁有的一切已經(jīng)讓我感到很滿足，我并不期望更多。我努力工作，置身于這些誠懇的人群中，為自己創(chuàng)造正常的生活。我還是以前的那個(gè)我，也許復(fù)明只是意味著我能從身體上分享更多的東西，而且，能把以前的感受和現(xiàn)在的結(jié)合起來。

曾經(jīng)說我再也不能復(fù)明的那個(gè)醫(yī)生，現(xiàn)在又告訴我，我左眼的視力已經(jīng)恢復(fù)了80%。能夠看著他，說我又能看見了——老實(shí)說，這感覺簡直再好不過了。他給我做了所有的測試，讓我讀視力檢查表，卻沒有做出任何解釋，他依然像以前那樣，自言自語道，視覺神經(jīng)已經(jīng)損壞了，不可能再生的。

我并不認(rèn)為這和我那天撞到頭有什么關(guān)系，如果別人要這樣認(rèn)為，那也沒關(guān)系。但我認(rèn)為這是一個(gè)奇跡，除此之外，再也沒有其他方式可以形容了。有些事情就是無法解釋。當(dāng)然，有些人會(huì)很懷疑，但對我來說，它無比珍貴。我努力不去想可能還會(huì)失明，就算明天再度失明，我的恢復(fù)也依然是一個(gè)奇跡。

核心單詞

afterward['a：ft?w?d]adv.之后，以后，后來

partiaI['pa：??l]adj.部分的，局部的；不完全的

devastate['dev?steit]v.使荒蕪；破壞；使垮掉，壓倒

scare[skε?]v.驚嚇，使恐懼

teenage['ti：neid?]adj.十幾歲的 n.青少年時(shí)期

favorite['feiv?rit]adj.特別喜愛的

genuine['d?enjuin]adj.真的；名副其實(shí)的；真誠的

regenerate[ri'd?en?rit]adj.刷新的 v.刷新；重建

miracIe['mir?kl]n.奇跡；奇跡般的人（或物）

實(shí)用句型

When I stood in front of the mirror, I reached to touch my face.我站在鏡子前，觸摸著自己的臉。