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從復(fù)旦投毒案解讀室友關(guān)系

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Li Xiongfeng and his roommates had all fallen asleep in the quiet night. But then his phone suddenly started ringing loudly and woke everybody up. One of his roommates was annoyed and Li was not happy about the disturbance either.

夜深人靜,李雄峰(音譯)和室友們都進入了夢鄉(xiāng)。但突然間他的手機鈴聲響起,吵醒了所有人。一位室友因此惱火不已,就連李雄峰自己也很不高興。

“I didn’t expect such a trivial matter could sour my relationship with my roommates,” said Li, 20, a sophomore law major at South China Normal University.

“我沒想到這么點小事兒就會影響我和室友的關(guān)系。”就讀于華南師范大學(xué)法律專業(yè)大二年級,20歲的李雄峰說道。

Last week, Fudan University issued a statement regarding the preliminary police report on the poisoning of a student by his roommate that shocked the nation.

復(fù)旦投毒案震驚全國上下。上周,復(fù)旦大學(xué)就警方的初步報告發(fā)表了聲明。

“Trivial matters in daily life” were blamed for the tragedy, in which 27-year-old Huang Yang was killed.

在這樁悲劇中,27歲的黃洋被室友殺害,而這一切的元兇,正是“日常生活中的瑣碎小事”。

According to experts, it’s the small things that can cause serious problems for dormitory relations. As their first lesson at college, students should learn to compromise when living with their peers and be tolerant toward them.

專家表示,正是這些小事會對室友關(guān)系構(gòu)成重大危機。作為大學(xué)的第一課,學(xué)生們應(yīng)該學(xué)會與同伴相處時,如何做出妥協(xié)與包容。

Dormitory relations are among the top concerns for students who enjoyed being the focal point of their family in high school. Only 43 percent of college students in Wuhan, which has more than 1 million college students, are happy with their dormitory relations, according to a report by Wuhan Yangtze Business University released in January.

對于高中時被全家人捧在手心的學(xué)生們而言,寢室關(guān)系成為他們最擔(dān)心的問題之一。武漢長江工商學(xué)院于今年一月發(fā)布的一份報告顯示,在武漢當(dāng)?shù)爻^一百萬的大學(xué)生中,只有43%對自己的寢室關(guān)系感到滿意。

“This communal way of living is new to students, the majority of whom are single children. Many of them expect people to change for them, not the other way around,” said Tan Mali, deputy Party secretary at South China Normal University.

“對于學(xué)生們來說,這種公共生活方式是種全新體驗,而他們其中大多數(shù)人都是獨生子女。很多人都希望別人為自己而改變,而不是改變自身來適應(yīng)他人。”華南師范大學(xué)黨委副書記譚馬利表示。

For many students, respecting other’s property and personal space is the foundation to maintain peace in the dormitory.

對于許多學(xué)生來說,尊重他人財產(chǎn)與個人空間是保持寢室關(guān)系和睦的基礎(chǔ)。

It can be fixed

覆水可收

Liao Fei, 22, a senior majoring in biology at Peking University, believes that in a shared space, all roommates should help in keeping the room tidy instead of placing the burden on just one while the others do whatever they want.

就讀于北京大學(xué)生物學(xué)專業(yè)大四年級,22歲的廖飛(音譯)認為,在一個共享空間里,每個寢室成員都應(yīng)當(dāng)保持房間的整潔,不應(yīng)該把打掃房間的重擔(dān)都壓在一個人肩上,而其他人卻隨心所欲。

“Everyone hates dirty places. If you make a mess, don’t leave it for someone else to clean up. Make sure you do your fair share of dormitory chores, such as taking out the trash and recycling, and cleaning the washroom,” said Liao.

“大家都不喜歡臟亂差。如果你把寢室搞得亂七八糟,別等著別人來替你收拾。要保證做好宿舍雜務(wù)中你份內(nèi)的事情,比如倒垃圾、回收廢品以及打掃洗手間。”廖飛說。

No matter what, conflicts are inevitable when living with others for four years. But a conflict isn’t the end of the world. A serious talk or even just a joke can fix the problem.

無論如何,與他人共處四年時間,矛盾總是難免的。但是矛盾并非世界末日。認真地談一次心或者開個玩笑就可以讓麻煩煙消云散。

Luo Lisha, 22, a senior majoring in journalism at the Communication University of China, had an argument with her roommate a while ago.

來自中國傳媒大學(xué)新聞系大四年級、22歲的羅麗莎(音譯)前不久便和室友有過一次爭執(zhí)。

Instead of burying her feelings, Luo talked with her roommate and they’ve been getting along well ever since.

羅麗莎并沒有把情緒埋在心里,而是選擇與室友好好談?wù)?,自那以后她們相處得很好?/p>

“Being frank and letting everyone speak their mind is a great way to let off steam,” said Luo.

“坦誠相待,直抒己見是宣泄不滿的最好方式。”羅麗莎說。

According to Sun Jianmin, dean of the Psychology Department at Renmin University, learning to compromise around others is one of the most important lessons in life.

中國人民大學(xué)心理學(xué)系系主任孫健敏表示,學(xué)會向他人妥協(xié)是生活中最重要的一課。

“Does it really matter if someone’s cup was not rinsed out or if their computer was left on all night? If it bothers you a lot then bring it up, but if it’s a small thing - just let it go,” said Sun.

“有人沒洗杯子,或者電腦整夜開著,這些真的重要?如果這確實困擾到你,那就提出來,如果只是小事一樁,就不要太在意了。”孫健敏說。

“It’s tempting to vent your frustration on others when things start to annoy you. But it’s better to talk about it with others in a way they can accept. Being obsessed with insignificant things only creates more problems.”

“當(dāng)為一些事苦惱時,你往往會選擇發(fā)泄對他人的不滿。但最好還是以一種別人能接受的方式與他們好好談一談。過分為小事計較只會徒增煩惱。”


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