Chapter 19
TOM arrived at home in a dreary mood, and the first thing his aunt said to him
showed him that he had brought his sorrows to an unpromising market:
"Tom, I've a notion to skin you alive!"
"Auntie, what have I done?"
"Well, you've done enough. Here I go over to Sereny Harper, like an old softy,
expecting I'm going to make her believe all that rubbage about that dream, when lo and
behold you she'd found out from Joe that you was over here and heard all the talk we had
that night. Tom, I don't know what is to become of a boy that will act like that. It makes
me feel so bad to think you could let me go to Sereny Harper and make such a fool of
myself and never say a word."
This was a new aspect of the thing. His smartness of the morning had seemed to Tom a
good joke before, and very ingenious. It merely looked mean and shabby now. He hung his
head and could not think of anything to say for a moment. Then he said:
"Auntie, I wish I hadn't done it -- but I didn't think."
"Oh, child, you never think. You never think of anything but your own selfishness.
You could think to come all the way over here from Jackson's Island in the night to laugh
at our troubles, and you could think to fool me with a lie about a dream; but you couldn't
ever think to pity us and save us from sorrow."
"Auntie, I know now it was mean, but I didn't mean to be mean. I didn't, honest.
And besides, I didn't come over here to laugh at you that night."
"What did you come for, then?"
"It was to tell you not to be uneasy about us, because we hadn't got
drownded."
"Tom, Tom, I would be the thankfullest soul in this world if I could believe you
ever had as good a thought as that, but you know you never did -- and I know it,
Tom."
"Indeed and 'deed I did, auntie -- I wish I may never stir if I didn't."
"Oh, Tom, don't lie -- don't do it. It only makes things a hundred times
worse."
"It ain't a lie, auntie; it's the truth. I wanted to keep you from grieving --
that was all that made me come."
"I'd give the whole world to believe that -- it would cover up a power of sins,
Tom. I'd 'most be glad you'd run off and acted so bad. But it ain't reasonable; because,
why didn't you tell me, child?"
"Why, you see, when you got to talking about the funeral, I just got all full of
the idea of our coming and hiding in the church, and I couldn't somehow bear to spoil it.
So I just put the bark back in my pocket and kept mum."
"What bark?"
"The bark I had wrote on to tell you we'd gone pirating. I wish, now, you'd waked
up when I kissed you -- I do, honest."
The hard lines in his aunt's face relaxed and a sudden tenderness dawned in her eyes.
"Did you kiss me, Tom?"
"Why, yes, I did."
"Are you sure you did, Tom?"
"Why, yes, I did, auntie -- certain sure."
"What did you kiss me for, Tom?"
"Because I loved you so, and you laid there moaning and I was so sorry."
The words sounded like truth. The old lady could not hide a tremor in her voice when
she said:
"Kiss me again, Tom! -- and be off with you to school, now, and don't bother me
any more."
The moment he was gone, she ran to a closet and got out the ruin of a jacket which Tom
had gone pirating in. Then she stopped, with it in her hand, and said to herself:
"No, I don't dare. Poor boy, I reckon he's lied about it -- but it's a blessed,
blessed lie, there's such a comfort come from it. I hope the Lord -- I know the Lord will
forgive him, because it was such goodheartedness in him to tell it. But I don't want to
find out it's a lie. I won't look."
She put the jacket away, and stood by musing a minute. Twice she put out her hand to
take the garment again, and twice she refrained. Once more she ventured, and this time she
fortified herself with the thought: "It's a good lie -- it's a good lie -- I won't
let it grieve me." So she sought the jacket pocket. A moment later she was reading
Tom's piece of bark through flowing tears and saying: "I could forgive the boy, now,
if he'd committed a million sins!"
第十九章 湯姆花言巧語,姨媽慈悲心腸
湯姆悶悶不樂地回到家里。姨媽一見他就數(shù)落了他一通,他感到就是回家也不一定能減
輕他的苦楚。
“湯姆呀,湯姆,我想活剝了你!”
“姨媽,我怎么了?”
“瞧,你作得夠嗆。都是因為你,我呆頭呆腦地跑去找賽倫尼·哈帕,像個老傻瓜似
的,指望能讓她相信你編的那個鬼夢??墒悄闱?,她早就從喬那里了解到那天晚上你回過
家,聽見了我們所說的一切。湯姆,我不知道像你這樣的孩子將來會怎么樣。都是因為你,
我才到賽倫尼·哈帕那兒去,出盡了洋相。一想到這,我就很傷心。”
湯姆沒想到事情會鬧到這種地步。他本以為早上耍的小聰明只是玩笑,很有獨創(chuàng)性,可
現(xiàn)在看來那既卑鄙又可恥。他先是垂下頭,無言以對,然后開口說:
“姨媽,我希望那不是我干的,不過我沒想到……”
“是的,孩子,你從來不動腦筋,只想著自己。你能想到夜里從杰克遜島那么大老遠地
跑來幸災(zāi)樂禍;你能想到編夢撒謊來糊弄我,可你就想不到來告訴我們你還活著并沒有死。
你知道我們當(dāng)時是多么傷心嗎?”
“姨媽,我現(xiàn)在知道了,那樣做太卑鄙??墒俏也皇谴嫘囊氨傻?,真的,我不是存心
的。還有,那天夜里我到這里來不是要來看笑話的。”
“那么,你到這里來干什么呢?”
“是來告訴你們別為我操心,因為我們并沒有淹死。”
“湯姆啊,湯姆,我要是能相信你真有這么好的心腸,還替別人著想,那我可就謝天謝
地啰!不過,你心里明白你是個什么樣的人,這我也明白,湯姆。”
“姨媽,我可是千真萬確這么打算的。我雖然擾了你,但我要不是這么打算的,我甘愿
蹲大牢。”
“哦,得了吧,湯姆,不要撒謊——不要撒謊,否則事情更加糟糕,越發(fā)不可收拾。”
“我沒撒謊,姨媽,我說的全是真的。我是要來讓你別傷心的——我來就是為了這個。”
“湯姆,我真愿意信你的話,這樣可以一肥遮百丑。你出走,捉弄我們那我反倒很高
興。可是這聽起來不對勁,如果真像你所說的那樣,孩子,那你為什么不先告訴我呢?”
“哎,你瞧,我聽你說要給我們舉行葬禮,我滿心都想著要跑到教堂里躲起來,我舍不
得不這么干。所以,我把樹皮又放到口袋里,沒有出來說。”
“什么樹皮?”
“上面寫著我們?nèi)ギ?dāng)海盜的那塊樹皮。唉,我當(dāng)時吻你的時候,你要是醒了就好了。真
的,我真是這樣希望的。”
姨媽繃緊的臉一下子松開了,她眼里突然閃現(xiàn)出慈祥的目光。
“你吻了我,湯姆?”
“是啊,我吻了。”
“你敢肯定,湯姆?”
“那還用說,我吻了,姨媽,百分之百的肯定。”
“那你為什么要吻我,湯姆?”
“因為我很愛你,當(dāng)時你躺在那里哭泣,我十分難過。”
湯姆說的像是真的。老太太再說話的時候已掩飾不住激動的心情,聲音顫抖地說:
“湯姆,再吻我一下!現(xiàn)在你可以去上學(xué)了,不要再來煩我了。”
湯姆剛一走,她就跑到櫥子那里拿出湯姆當(dāng)“海盜”時穿的那件破夾克,站在那兒自言
自語道:
“不,我不敢看??蓱z的孩子,我猜他說的是謊話——不過,這是個十足善意的謊話,
令人寬慰。我希望上帝——我知道上帝一準(zhǔn)會原諒他,因為他心眼好,才撒這樣的謊。我情
愿這不是謊言。我不想看。”
她放下夾克站在那里想了一會。她兩次伸手想再去拿那衣服,兩次又把手縮了回來。最
后,她堅定了決心再次伸出手去,心里想著:“這謊撒得好,我喜歡這樣的謊話,別讓它壞
了我的美事。”于是她翻了夾克衫上的口袋,隨即她看見了那塊樹皮上的字,于是她老淚縱
橫,邊流淚邊說:“就算這孩子錯了,哪怕是大錯特錯,我現(xiàn)在也能原諒他了。”