老爸老媽的浪漫史第四季09

[00:01.38]Kids,everyone has an opinion on how long it takes to recover from a breakup.
[00:01.38]孩子們 對于從情傷中復原需要多長時間 每個人都有自己的看法
[00:05.47]Half the length of the relationship.
[00:05.47]這段關系持續(xù)時間的一半那么長
[00:07.49]One week for every month you were together.
[00:07.49]每在一起一個月就需要一周恢復
[00:09.53]Exactly 10,000 drinks.
[00:09.53]只需喝一萬杯酒
[00:11.39]However long that takes.
[00:11.39]愛喝多久就多久
[00:12.81]You can't measure something likehis in time.
[00:12.81]這事無法用時間計算
[00:15.44]There's a series of steps.
[00:15.44]它分為幾個步驟
[00:17.28]From her bed to the front door. Bam! Out of there. Next!
[00:17.28]從她床上爬起 走向房門 嗙! 甩門而出 向下一位出發(fā)!
[00:21.81]But I think you start to recover the moment you meet that person who gets you back in the game.
[00:21.81]但我想直到你遇到讓你重陷愛河的人 你才能復原
[00:27.53]This is the story of how I met that person.
[00:27.53]這就是關于我怎么遇到這個人的故事
[00:38.32]Now,kids,if you want to go swimming,you don't just dive in.
[00:38.32]那么 孩子們 如果你們想要游泳 你們不能一頭猛扎進水里
[00:42.26]First,you dip your toe in the water.
[00:42.26]首先 你們要拿腳尖蘸蘸水
[00:55.06]You check the temperature. See how it feels.
[00:55.06]你們得先試試水溫 看看是否合適
[00:58.88]I'm Ted.
[00:58.88]我叫Ted
[01:01.29]Vicky.
[01:01.29]Vicky
[01:30.90]And then you slowly wade in.
[01:30.90]然后你們慢慢將自己沉下去
[01:33.02]I got left at the altar a month ago.
[01:33.02]我一個月前在婚禮上被甩了
[01:34.87]Or,you know,cannonball.
[01:34.87]或者 這么說吧 血雨情瘋
[01:36.34]It was a complete disaster and ever since then,I haven't been able to even look at another woman.
[01:36.34]那真是場災難 自那以后 我再也無法正視別的女人一眼了
[01:42.59]Except for the old lady on the subway who break-dances for nickels.
[01:42.59]除了在地鐵碰到的跳舞討錢的老婆子
[01:46.31]I don't look at her that way. I just look at her.
[01:46.31]我并不是有什么想法的看著她 就是瞟一眼而已
[01:48.78]I mean,it's an old lady break-dancing.
[01:48.78]我的意思是 就是一胡亂跳舞的老太太
[01:51.34]And she is good.
[01:51.34]不過 她跳得還不錯
[01:53.22]I'm going to give her a dollar next time.
[01:53.22]下回我會給她一美元的
[01:56.59]Hey,let's pretend I just said this:
[01:56.59]嘿 讓我們假設一下 我剛才其實是這樣說的:
[01:59.18]These elevator rides have been the highlight of my week,
[01:59.18]最近的電梯偶遇就是我這一周的希望之光
[02:02.05]and I'd love to see you again Friday night. Not in the elevator.
[02:02.05]我周五晚上很想再見你一面 不是在電梯里
[02:06.86]At a restaurant,a nice one.
[02:06.86]而是在餐廳 高級餐廳
[02:09.31]What do you say?
[02:09.31]你覺得呢?
[02:12.62]Yes.
[02:12.62]好的
[02:25.76]How I Met Your Mother Season04 Episode09
[02:25.76]老爸老媽浪漫史 第四季 第9集
[02:27.76]Kids,I walked in on a lot of crazy stuff at the old apartment over the years.
[02:27.76]孩子們 這幾年 我踏進這老房子總會碰見些烏龍的事
[02:34.98]Sorry,guys. I'm just going to go with a bowl of fruit.
[02:34.98]抱歉 伙計們 我看我還是畫些水果靜物畫好了
[02:39.76]It's been 12 minutes!
[02:39.76]已經過了12分鐘了!
[02:46.59]- Drop it! - You first!
[02:46.59]- 放下槍! - 你先放下!
[02:48.63]Ike,why are you pointing your gun at me?
[02:48.63]Ike 你為啥要把槍指著我啊?
[02:50.10]Don't use my name!
[02:50.10]不許叫我的名字!
[02:51.25]Put the guns down,now!
[02:51.25]把槍放下 馬上!
[02:58.64]But one of the craziest things I ever walked in on happened when I was roommates with your Aunt Robin.
[02:58.64]但是最讓人哭笑不得的事發(fā)生在 我和你們Robin阿姨同住的期間
[03:13.32]Who are you?
[03:13.32]你是哪位?
[03:14.82]I'm Mitch.
[03:14.82]我是Mitch
[03:18.23]What you doing,Mitch?
[03:18.23]你在干嘛 Mitch?
[03:20.08]Oh,you must be the roommate.
[03:20.08]哦 你一定就是她的室友
[03:22.33]I'm on a date with Robin.
[03:22.33]我和Robin約會呢
[03:23.62]She had to step outside to take a call.
[03:23.62]她出去接個電話
[03:25.93]I guess her cell phone doesn't work in here.
[03:25.93]我想她的電話在這里面沒有信號
[03:29.73]Oh,Robin,uh,didn't use the super secret signal.
[03:29.73]哦 Robin 呣 忘了使用頂級秘密的信號
[03:33.67]We-we put this old takeout menu on the doorknob.
[03:33.67]我們-我們一般會把這個以前的我外賣菜單 套在門把手上
[03:37.12]Place went out of business.
[03:37.12]這飯店已經倒閉了
[03:38.72]Mr. Wang's... Guess I don't have to explain why that's funny.
[03:38.72]老王家的館... 我想我都不用解釋原因了 太搞笑了
[03:43.72]I'm going to go.
[03:43.72]我得走了
[03:47.93]Um,when you leave,take the seat cushion with you. That's trash now.
[03:47.93]呣 你走的時候 把沙發(fā)坐墊也拿走吧 那已經是垃圾了
[03:53.15]I think that I am more than qualified for the job.
[03:53.15]我想我非常適合這份工作
[03:56.00]My weaknesses?
[03:56.00]我的缺點?
[03:57.93]I would say caring too much,working too hard,and putting my career in front of my love life.
[03:57.93]我想是我太苛求完美 工作過于認真 總把工作置于愛情之上
[04:02.85]Whoops,that last one was real. What?
[04:02.85]喔 最后一條絕對是真的 什么?
[04:08.17]Well,it appears our sweet,innocent,little Robin has taken a lover.
[04:08.17]嗯 似乎我們很傻很天真的Robin 開始與情人約會了
[04:13.06]A young blade by the name of Mitch.
[04:13.06]一個叫Mitch的年輕小哥
[04:15.75]No,her blind date? Total bust.
[04:15.75]不會吧 她的快速約會? 一團糟
[04:17.60]She's been sending me text messages all night.
[04:17.60]她整晚都在給我發(fā)短信
[04:19.92]She just let him go upstairs to use the bathroom a second ago.
[04:19.92]她剛只是讓他到樓上用下洗浴室
[04:23.71]Excuse me a minute.
[04:23.71]抱歉 我出去一會
[04:28.78]Buddy,you are killing me.
[04:28.78]伙計 你饒了我吧
[04:30.15]I'm kind of in the middle of something here.
[04:30.15]我正等著好戲上演呢
[04:32.02]Middle of what?
[04:32.02]什么好戲?
[04:34.68]This is my move.
[04:34.68]這是我的策略
[04:36.45]It's called,"The Naked Man."
[04:36.45]它叫做 "裸男計劃"
[04:38.37]The Naked Man?
[04:38.37]裸男計劃?
[04:39.86]Goes like this: You're on a first date,you've had a few drinks,
[04:39.86]它是這樣的:你和女生第一次約會 你們喝了點小酒
[04:44.38]You make an excuse to go up to the girl's apartment.
[04:44.38]你找個借口去到女生的房間
[04:46.73]So,the bathroom's right there.
[04:46.73]那么 洗浴室就在那邊
[04:49.98]- You know what,I'm going to grab this. - Okay.
[04:49.98]- 你看 我得去接一下 - 好的
[04:52.71]Hello?
[04:52.71]你好?
[04:53.37]Then,once she leaves the room,you strip down naked and wait.
[04:53.37]然后 當她離開房間 你脫光衣服 等她回來
[04:58.53]When she comes back,she laughs.
[04:58.53]當她回來時 她會心一笑
[05:02.23]She's so charmed by your confidence and bravado,she sleeps with you.
[05:02.23]她將被你的自信與勇氣迷倒 和你上床
[05:06.15]Boom!
[05:06.15]嗙!
[05:08.82]There is no way that works!
[05:08.82]這決不可能!
[05:11.01]Two out of three times.
[05:11.01]十試九爽
[05:12.63]Two out of three times?
[05:12.63]十試九爽?
[05:14.47]Two out of three times.
[05:14.47]十試九爽
[05:16.08]You just have to pick your spot.
[05:16.08]你只需看清楚形勢
[05:17.94]The Naked Man is best used as a last resort,
[05:17.94]裸男計劃最好用作下下之策
[05:20.68]kind of a Hail Mary on a first date when you know there's not going to be a second one.
[05:20.68]一般是第一次約會的救命稻草 如果你判定你們不會有下次約會的話
[05:24.93]How do you know there's not going to be a second date?
[05:24.93]你怎么知道你們不會有下一次約會了?
[05:26.60]- Ted,look at me. - I'd rather not,Mitch.
[05:26.60]- Ted 你看看我 - 我可不想看 Mitch
[05:29.40]Robiis way out of my league.
[05:29.40]Robin 不愛我這一型的
[05:31.63]I'm not smart,funny or handsome.
[05:31.63]我不聰明 不幽默也不帥 (還挺明白的嘛)
[05:34.63]And as you can plainly see,there's nothing impressive going on anywhere around here.
[05:34.63]就如你所見 我渾身上下沒有哪處讓你印象深刻的
[05:39.90]My only shot with a girl like Robin is the element of surprise.
[05:39.90]我能和Robin這樣的女孩約會 唯一的機會就是出其不意
[05:42.91]And,let's be honest,a little pity.
[05:42.91]而且 老實說 是有點悲哀
[05:46.37]It's shock and "aw."
[05:46.37]一般她們是很吃驚的 但是不是贊嘆 而是嘆氣的"噢"
[05:49.81]This doesn't really work.
[05:49.81]這絕不可能
[05:51.09]Two out of three times. Guaranteed.
[05:51.09]十試九爽 我保證
[05:54.93]No way.
[05:54.93]不會吧
[05:56.23]Two out of three times.
[05:56.23]十試九爽
[05:58.50]He guaranteed it.
[05:58.50]他保證的
[05:59.73]Oh,come on.
[05:59.73]哦 得了吧
[06:01.22]There is no way that's going to work on Robin.
[06:01.22]這招絕不可能對Robin管用的
[06:03.31]She's going to walk in there,take one look at that idiot and send him packing.
[06:03.31]她只會走過去 瞧那個白癡一眼 給他掃地出門
[06:06.59]Yeah,she might kick his ass first.
[06:06.59]沒錯 她可能會先給他屁屁來一腳
[06:08.52]Yeah,she might get her gun and shoot him.
[06:08.52]沒錯 沒準還給他一槍
[06:16.12]Go,go!
[06:16.12]走 走!
[06:19.36]My God! It worked.
[06:19.36]天啊! 管用了
[06:21.99]Mr. Wang's is back in business?
[06:21.99]老王家的館重新開張了?
[06:29.64]The Naked Man works!
[06:29.64]裸男計劃成功了!
[06:32.16]This is going to revolutionize the one-night stand!
[06:32.16]這將徹底改變一夜情的理論依據!
[06:35.29]This is like the forward pass in football.
[06:35.29]這就像橄欖球里的帶球前沖
[06:38.18]The slam dunk in basketball.
[06:38.18]籃球里的大灌籃
[06:40.19]The haircutting technique where they hold it between their fingers and cut right above it.
[06:40.19]就像理發(fā)師挑起幾縷頭發(fā) 在上面嚯嚯開剪的功夫
[06:43.52]It's a total game changer!
[06:43.52]這是游戲規(guī)則的創(chuàng)新!
[06:45.43]Barney,this guy slept with Robin,who you claim to be in love with.
[06:45.43]Barney 那家伙和Robin上床 你不是聲稱愛著她嗎
[06:49.20]How can you be excited about this?
[06:49.20]你怎能如此興奮?
[06:51.52]Lily,"The Naked Man" is bigger than me and Robin.
[06:51.52]Lily "裸男計劃" 比我和Robin的事還要重要
[06:56.55]All these years,I have been busting my hump,
[06:56.55]這些年來 我使勁渾身解數
[06:59.92]with my secret identities and my tricks and my gadgets.
[06:59.92]使用我的秘密身份 我的技巧和我的小道具
[07:04.32]I mean,I'm like Batman.
[07:04.32]我的意思是 我就像蝙蝠俠
[07:06.85]But this Mitch fellow,he's Superman.
[07:06.85]但這個叫Mitch的家伙 他是超人
[07:08.96]He just rips off his clothes and he's good to go.
[07:08.96]他只是把衣服一脫 然后就成了
[07:11.38]What kind of gadgets are we talking about?
[07:11.38]你剛才說什么道具?
[07:15.08]So,this is what it's going to be like,us living together?
[07:15.08]那么 我們住在一起 就像這樣 發(fā)生這種事?
[07:16.95]I come home,and guys you're dating are just going to be sitting on the couch,naked.
[07:16.95]我回到家 看到和你約會的家伙光著身子坐在沙發(fā)上
[07:20.93]Well,I wish I could say no.
[07:20.93]嗯 我也不想那樣的
[07:23.42]I still cannot believe the "Naked Man" worked on you.
[07:23.42]我真不敢相信 "裸男計劃"竟然對你管用
[07:26.58]Well,what can I say?
[07:26.58]那么 我說什么好呢?
[07:27.81]Okay,I went in there,and he was naked.
[07:27.81]好吧 我進屋 看到他裸著身
[07:30.58]It was funny.
[07:30.58]這很滑稽
[07:32.01]I laughed,he laughed.
[07:32.01]我笑了 他也笑了
[07:34.60]And then it just kind of happened. I don't know.
[07:34.60]然后就這樣發(fā)生了 我也不知道怎么回事
[07:40.35]I call "slut!"
[07:40.35]我要說 "賤人!"
[07:43.19]Excuse me?
[07:43.19]什么?
[07:44.34]I'm sorry,Robin,but you hooking up with this guy makes it seem like the only thing standing
[07:44.34]我很抱歉 Robin 但是你和那家伙上床就好像是證明了
[07:47.24]between you and sex is clothes.
[07:47.24]你和上床之間的間隔就是衣服
[07:51.10]I didn't just sleep with Mitcbecause he was naked.
[07:51.10]我和Mitch上床不僅僅是因為 他那時光著身子
[07:54.33]Then why did you sleep with him?
[07:54.33]那你為什么和他上床?
[07:55.44]Because... he,um... He,uh...
[07:55.44]因為... 他 呣 ... 他 呣...
[07:59.57]uh,because I care about Mitch. A lot.
[07:59.57]呣 因為我很在乎Mitch 非常在乎
[08:04.18]There was a,uh,connection of specialness.
[08:04.18]這跟 呣 一種特殊的感覺有關
[08:09.02]Of,uh,specialness and feelings.
[08:09.02]一種 呣 特殊的感覺
[08:12.24]It was because he was naked.
[08:12.24]就是因為他光著身子
[08:13.89]And I'm sorry,but I don't approve.
[08:13.89]我很抱歉 但我不敢茍同
[08:15.49]There is only one reason to sleep with somebody,and that is "love."
[08:15.49]和別人上床只有一個原因 那就是"愛情"
[08:22.45]Yeah,Marshall's a big girl because he believes in true love
[08:22.45]沒錯 Marshall是個傻妞 因為他相信真愛
[08:25.44]and just finished reading The Notebook because the secretaries bullied him into joining Oprah's Book Club.
[08:25.44]而且剛剛讀完小說<記事本> 因為秘書們逼他加入奧普拉圖書俱樂部
[08:29.20]Fine! But you know I'm right.
[08:29.20]好吧! 但你們知道我是對的
[08:31.36]Marshall,I love you,but there's lots of reasons to have sex.
[08:31.36]Marshall 我愛你 但還有很多其他原因可以上床的
[08:35.22]Name one.
[08:35.22]舉個例子
[08:35.93]- I can name 50. - No,you can't.
[08:35.93]- 我可以舉50個 - 不 你不能
[08:38.10]Number one: last Thursday.
[08:38.10]例子一:上周四
[08:47.19]- Hey,Marshall,want to do it? - I'm up.
[08:47.19]- 嘿 Marshall 想做嗎? - 我這就來了
[08:51.21]You befouled our marital bed because you couldn't get to sleep?
[08:51.21]你因為失眠就褻瀆我們的婚床?
[08:55.69]You're the one who said,"That shadow on the ceilin looks like a scary toothless clown."
[08:55.69]是你說"天花板上的那個黑影 真像個恐怖的無牙小丑"
[08:59.82]Good night,Lily."
[08:59.82]"晚安 Lily"
[09:01.48]Fine! That's one.
[09:01.48]好吧! 算是吧
[09:02.77]- But I defy you to name... - I'm going to name 50.
[09:02.77]- 但是我敢說你舉不到... - 我就舉50個例子給你看看
[09:06.20]There's "makeup" sex...
[09:06.20]還有 "化妝"性愛...
[09:08.54]breakup sex,Hmm...
[09:08.54]分手性愛 呣 ...
[09:10.00]and "your friend just told you about a new-position" sex.
[09:10.00]還有 "你老友剛告訴你一個新姿勢"性愛
[09:13.12]You're welcome.
[09:13.12]這是我份內事
[09:15.23]There's also "revenge",rebound, paratrooping.
[09:15.23]還有 報復 復合 天降奇兵式性愛
[09:20.51]You know,when you go out of town but instead of getting a hotel room,
[09:20.51]你們知道 當你們出城去 沒住賓館
[09:22.90]you go straight to a bar with the sole intention of hooking up with a girl so you have a place to stay.
[09:22.90]你們去到酒吧 只有一個目的 就是泡上一個有房的妞兒 這樣你就有地方住了
[09:26.82]Oh,you mean "banging for roof."
[09:26.82]哦 你是說 "寄宿式"
[09:28.95]Slut!
[09:28.95]賤人!
[09:30.50]I don't do it. My college roommate did it.
[09:30.50]我可沒做過 是我的大學室友
[09:32.64]Oh,no,no,Robin,I just have a bad cough.
[09:32.64]哦 不 不 Robin 我剛咳嗽了
[09:34.92]I don't really have a bad cough.
[09:34.92]我并沒有咳嗽
[09:37.27]We all know college roommate means you,slut!
[09:37.27]我們都知道那個所謂大學室友 就是你自己 賤人!
[09:42.24]Does anyone have a lozenge?
[09:42.24]你們有喉片嗎?
[09:44.74]Ooh,ooh,ooh,I've got one.
[09:44.74]噢 噢 噢 我想到了
[09:46.27]Nothing good on television sex.
[09:46.27]沒什么電視可看的時候
[09:49.06]Hotel room sex.
[09:49.06]賓館性愛
[09:50.82]Curiosity,as in...
[09:50.82]好奇性愛 例如 ...
[09:53.38]"I've always wondered what it's like to have sex with a really tall girl.
[09:53.38]我常在想和一個高個子女生做愛是什么感覺
[09:56.95]Not a big girl,just a tall girl.
[09:56.95]不是五大三粗的 只是高個子
[10:01.34]Like...
[10:01.34]就像...
[10:02.73]if a normal girl were seven,seven-and-a-half-feet tall
[10:02.73]如果女生普通身高就有7-7.5英尺高 (相當于2.13米到2.28米)
[10:08.50]and wore a denim miniskirt.
[10:08.50]還穿著穿著牛仔超短裙
[10:13.05]I would have to know what that is like.
[10:13.05]我就想知道這是什么感覺
[10:15.85]Okay.
[10:15.85]好吧
[10:17.86]32 reasons later...
[10:17.86]說了32種理由以后...
[10:18.97]"He said he loved you,...."
[10:18.97]"他說他愛你 但你不能同樣的話回應..."
[10:21.96]Forty-three.
[10:21.96]四十三種
[10:23.70]Wingman diving on the friend grenade.
[10:23.70]被泡妞拍檔拋棄
[10:25.70]Forty-four.
[10:25.70]四十四種
[10:27.55]The condoms are about to expire.
[10:27.55]避孕套即將過期
[10:29.73]Forty-five.
[10:29.73]四十五種
[10:35.22]Wow,this is getting a little hard.
[10:35.22]哇 越來越難了(硬了)
[10:37.21]Forty-six!
[10:37.21]四十六種!
[10:41.28]Okay,four more to go.
[10:41.28]好吧 還有四條
[10:43.83]"You dropped a Cheeto on his lap "and when you reached for it,he thought you were making a move,"
[10:43.83]"你的奇多掉他膝蓋上了 你過去撿的時候 他以為你開始前戲了"
[10:48.81]so you just went with it.
[10:48.81]所以你就趁勢而"上"
[10:51.38]Well,thank you for ruining the memory of our six-month anniversary.
[10:51.38]好吧 多謝你毀了 我們結婚六個月紀念日的回憶
[10:54.90]You got me Cheetos.
[10:54.90]但你確實用過"奇多"那招
[10:57.20]Look,can we just stop with this stupid list?
[10:57.20]聽著 我們能不能不再想這份愚蠢的列表?
[10:59.53]Okay,you guys are making me sad.
[10:59.53]好了 你們讓我覺得郁悶了
[11:01.10]No,I'm having fun.
[11:01.10]不要嘛 我只是找點樂子
[11:03.20]Man,this whole "one-partner" thing sucks sometimes.
[11:03.20]伙計 從一而終有時候也有點糟糕的
[11:06.49]I'm always talking about you.
[11:06.49]我總是在談論你
[11:08.54]I can't play "I never" because then everyone would know all the weird stuff I let you do to me.
[11:08.54]我不能玩"我從沒..."的游戲 因為這樣 大家就會知道我讓你對我做過的怪事
[11:13.62]The only weird thing I ever did to you was open up my heart and soul
[11:13.62]我對你做過最奇怪的事就是 對你敞開心扉
[11:17.26]when all I had to do was strip naked while you were out of the room.
[11:17.26]而其實只要你離開房間的時候我脫光光 就萬事大吉了
[11:20.21]I di't sleep with Mitch because he was naked!
[11:20.21]我不是因為Mitch脫光了而跟他上床!
[11:23.39]Mitch and I have something special.
[11:23.39]Mitch和我是有感覺的
[11:25.33]I mean,fingers crossed,guys. He maye the one.
[11:25.33]祝我好運吧 他可能就是我的真命天子
[11:27.76]The one? Mitch? The Naked Man?
[11:27.76]真命天子? Mitch? 那個裸男?
[11:30.32]You mean the naked genius.
[11:30.32]你是說那個天才裸男
[11:32.50]All these years I've been suiting up when I should have been suiting down.
[11:32.50]這些年來 我該脫的時候都沒脫
[11:36.42]That's it. I am doing "The Naked Man" tonight.
[11:36.42]就這么辦 我今晚要做"裸男"
[11:40.13]- Ted,so are you. - What?
[11:40.13]- Ted 你也是 - 什么?
[11:41.68]With the elevator girl. You're going out with her tonight,right?
[11:41.68]和電梯女孩 你今晚是不是要和她約會?
[11:43.51]- "Naked Man!" - No.
[11:43.51]- 裸男計劃! - 不
[11:45.24]Barney,come on,this is the first girl I've had the courage to ask out since Stella.
[11:45.24]Barney 拜托 這是自從Stella之后 我第一次鼓起勇氣約女孩出來
[11:48.40]Naked Man!
[11:48.40]裸男計劃!
[11:49.58]No,Barney,this is the eighth outfit I tried on tonight!
[11:49.58]不行 Barney 我今晚試了八套衣服!
[11:51.95]I got my hair cut three times! I'm a nervous wreck!
[11:51.95]我剪了三次頭發(fā)! 我非常緊張!
[11:55.05]Are you wearing makeup?
[11:55.05]你抹化妝品了?
[11:57.93]It's not makeup!
[11:57.93]不是化妝品!
[11:59.32]Okay,it's a sunscreen with a subtle tint of...
[11:59.32]好吧 這是一種細膩的淺色乳霜...
[12:03.38]It's made for men.
[12:03.38]是男士專用
[12:05.98]Sue me,I want my eyes to pop.
[12:05.98]有本事告我去 我只是想突出我的眼睛
[12:10.13]Naked Man!
[12:10.13]裸男!
[12:11.53]No,Barney,I like Vicky.
[12:11.53]不 Barney 我喜歡Vicky
[12:13.09]This could actually go somewhere.
[12:13.09]這可能是段戀愛的開始
[12:14.42]I don't want to do anything stupid to jeopardize it.
[12:14.42]我不想搞砸了
[12:16.96]Well,I really like... that girl,but...
[12:16.96]我真喜歡...那個女孩 但是...
[12:21.44]Oh,I didn't see her from the back.
[12:21.44]背怎么長的那么恐怖
[12:24.18]I really like... that girl.
[12:24.18]我很喜歡那個女孩
[12:27.49]And I'm willing to jeopardize our future together for one night of glory.
[12:27.49]而且我要為了一夜豪情 放棄我們的未來
[12:33.28]Naked Man!
[12:33.28]裸男計劃!
[12:36.04]So,that night we all set out to prove something.
[12:36.04]所以 那晚我們都開始證實一些事
[12:38.85]Robin wanted to defend her honor.
[12:38.85]Robin要捍衛(wèi)自己的尊嚴
[12:40.83]Mih,hey,baby,it's me. Robin.
[12:40.83]Mitch 嗨 親愛的 是我 Robin
[12:46.36]Do you want to grab some dinner tonight?
[12:46.36]你今晚想不想一起出去吃飯?
[12:49.37]Because you're basically my boyfriend!
[12:49.37]因為你基本算是我的男朋友了!
[12:52.75]Lily needed to prove that she could finish her list.
[12:52.75]Lily要證明她能完成自己的清單
[12:55.84]I'm stuck. I can't think of the last two.
[12:55.84]我卡住了 我想不出來最后兩個
[13:00.84]Reason number 48: To reinforce good behaviors such as shaving and dental hygiene."
[13:00.84]第48個原因 為了更好的形象 比如修面和口腔衛(wèi)生
[13:06.26]Oh,now you're conditioning me? Great!
[13:06.26]現在你開始干預我了? 太好了!
[13:08.08]That explains why I always get an erection when I floss.
[13:08.08]這就解釋了 為什么當我每次用牙線時都會勃起
[13:12.49]I had to prove that as scary as it was to be dating again,
[13:12.49]我要證明其實約會也沒什么可怕
[13:15.46]I was over Stella and ready to get back out there.
[13:15.46]我已經忘記Stella 開始新生活
[13:18.24]And Barney needed to prove that he,too,could pull off "The Naked Man."
[13:18.24]而Barney也需要證實他能實施"裸男計劃"
[13:21.78]Hey,thank you for letting me look at your aquarium. You're a real life saver.
[13:21.78]謝謝你讓我看你的魚缸 你真是個善良"救命"的人啊
[13:24.91]Sure,no problem.
[13:24.91]別這么客氣
[13:26.30]I just need to use the bathroom and I'll be on my way.
[13:26.30]我得用一下你的洗手間 然后我就離開
[13:35.97]Ted,I'm doing it. I'm doing the "Naked Man"!
[13:35.97]Ted 我準備好了 我要做裸男!
[13:39.99]Me,too!
[13:39.99]我也是!
[13:46.56]I'm doing it! I'm doing The Naked Man!
[13:46.56]我也是! 我也要做裸男!
[13:48.94]That's great!
[13:48.94]太棒了!
[13:50.41]What made you change your mind?
[13:50.41]你怎么改變主意了?
[13:51.50]Well,uhte with Vicky started off okay,but it didn't go as well as I hoped.
[13:51.50]開始和Vicky一切都還好 可是之后的事情就不在我預想之中了
[13:55.99]Oh,my God! Ted,you are so funny!
[13:55.99]上帝呀! Ted 你真幽默!
[13:59.16]And can I just say,you have amazing eyes.
[13:59.16]而且 你有一雙迷人的眼睛
[14:02.52]What,these old things?
[14:02.52]什么 就這倆老東西?
[14:05.62]Nice job,hot shot.
[14:05.62]干得好 想燙死我啊
[14:07.31]- I'm sorry... - Save it!
[14:07.31]- 對不起... - 省省吧!
[14:08.66]Go tell the manager he owes us an appetizer.
[14:08.66]去告訴你們經理 他欠我們一道開胃菜
[14:11.46]One of the ones with shrimp!
[14:11.46]有蝦的那種!
[14:13.94]You're welcome. You were saying?
[14:13.94]不客氣 你剛才想說什么?
[14:16.39]And then his cane missed the top step,and he was falling,for,I swear,like two minutes.
[14:16.39]他的拐杖漏掉最后一級臺階 然后他就摔倒了 我發(fā)誓 在那兩分鐘里...
[14:23.03]Oh,God,I love old people.
[14:23.03]我愛老人
[14:29.35]Once I realized there was no possible future in this relationship,I just decided to go for it.
[14:29.35]我意識到我們之間沒有發(fā)展的可能 所以我要放手一搏
[14:33.75]Awesome!
[14:33.75]太棒了!
[14:34.62]Okay,big question: What pose will you display your "Naked Man" in?
[14:34.62]重中之重 你打算擺個什么裸男造型?
[14:40.94]Wow,that is a big question. I hadn't really thought about it.
[14:40.94]哇 真是個棘手的問題 我還沒想過呢
[14:43.26]I was thinking the "Superman."
[14:43.26]我想做"超人"的姿勢
[14:47.63]Uh,what about the "Captain Morgan"?
[14:47.63]"船長Morgan"怎么樣?
[14:52.17]How about the "Oops,I didn't see you there"?
[14:52.17]"不好意思 沒想到你在這里" 這個姿勢行不行?
[14:57.03]The Thinker?
[14:57.03]"思想者"呢?
[14:59.65]What about the Heisman?
[14:59.65]橄欖球Heisman獎杯造型如何?
[15:02.57]Mr. Clean?
[15:02.57]潔凈先生(一種清潔劑品牌)?
[15:06.41]The Burt Reynolds.
[15:06.41]Burt Reynolds (美國演員 曾經在雜志上刊登過全裸照片)
[15:15.65]It's so great to see you again.
[15:15.65]真高興能再次見到你
[15:20.92]I-I really had a great time last night.
[15:20.92]我昨晚非常開心
[15:28.55]So,what is it like managing a C.P.K.?
[15:28.55]開加州披薩店是什么感覺啊?
[15:31.59]I mean,who's idea was it to put a pineapple in the...
[15:31.59]是誰的主意要把菠蘿放在...
[15:33.71]Okay,stop right there. I know what this is.
[15:33.71]行了 別說了 我知道你是怎么回事
[15:36.76]I've been on this date before.
[15:36.76]我以前有過這種約會
[15:38.12]This is the "I'm not a slut" date.
[15:38.12]這是"我不是蕩婦"的約會
[15:40.37]What? That's crazy.
[15:40.37]什么? 你怎么會這么想
[15:42.69]Usually u read me so well,but this time you're wrong.
[15:42.69]你通常很了解我 但這次你錯了
[15:45.61]Come on,Rob.
[15:45.61]拜托 Robin
[15:46.95]One of us had a good time last night,and we both know it was me.
[15:46.95]咱們都心知肚明 昨晚走運的是我
[15:50.63]Oh,Mitchell Something,that is,that is just not true!
[15:50.63]Mitchell 姓什么忘了 不是這樣的!
[15:55.16]Really? How was the sex?
[15:55.16]真的嗎? 那場性愛怎么樣?
[15:56.95]I didn't hate it.
[15:56.95]我并不討厭
[15:58.34]Robin,you've seen my move. That's it.
[15:58.34]Robin 你中了我的招 僅此而已
[16:02.50]I have nothing else to offer you.
[16:02.50]我沒什么別的本事了
[16:04.97]I'm broke,I sweat when I eat,and I'm in,like,five different fantasy football leagues.
[16:04.97]我破產了 我吃飯的時候出汗 而且我參加了5個想象中的橄欖球隊聯盟
[16:09.45]It's all I talk about.
[16:09.45]這就是我的生活
[16:11.14]Trust me,you don't want to be around that.
[16:11.14]相信我 你不會想和我在一起的
[16:12.71]What? Yes,I do!
[16:12.71]什么? 我當然愿意!
[16:15.38]Look,I didn't just sleep with you because you were naked.
[16:15.38]聽著 我跟你上床并不是因為你脫光了
[16:18.14]Yeah,you did.
[16:18.14]你確實這么做了
[16:19.86]And now you're trying to pretend it was something more to make yourself feel better.
[16:19.86]現在你想安慰自己 就假裝咱們之間有未來
[16:23.91]Say what you will,at least "The Naked Man" is honest.
[16:23.91]坦率點吧 至少裸男是誠實的
[16:28.97]What about the ol' "Coppertone Baby"?
[16:28.97]"水寶寶"怎么樣(一種護膚品牌)?
[16:34.97]The Olympic gymnast who stuck the landing.
[16:34.97]奧運會體操運動員穩(wěn)穩(wěn)落地
[16:38.15]Hup!
[16:38.15]耶!
[16:40.80]- Yeah,I got to go. - Naked Man!
[16:40.80]- 我要掛電話了 - 裸男!
[16:46.54]You have a really nice place!
[16:46.54]你家真漂亮!
[16:48.33]Oh,thanks! Coming from you,that's a real compliment.
[16:48.33]謝謝! 從你口中說出來 真是由衷的贊美
[16:51.19]I just love that you're an architect,it's so fascinating.
[16:51.19]我非常喜歡你的職業(yè) 建筑師實在太迷人了
[16:53.81]I could listen to you talk about structural design all night.
[16:53.81]我可以整晚都聽你談建筑設計
[16:58.30]And then I noticed,lying on her end table,a book of love poems by Pablo Neruda.
[16:58.30]后來我發(fā)現在她的茶幾上 有一本Pablo Neruda的愛情詩集
[17:03.02]The same edition I'd d nce college.
[17:03.02]和我從大學時就開始看的是同一版本
[17:05.39]And it was bookmarked to my favorite poem.
[17:05.39]而且夾書簽的那頁 是我最愛的一首詩
[17:09.86]Maybe I was all wrong about this girl.
[17:09.86]或許我完全看錯這個女孩了
[17:12.48]Maybe there was a future for us.
[17:12.48]或許我們有未來
[17:15.83]Crap!
[17:15.83]糟了!
[17:23.11]Here we go.
[17:23.11]來了
[17:26.16]Pablo Neruda.
[17:26.16]Pablo Neruda
[17:28.08]Oh,yeah,that book's a turd.
[17:28.08]這本書真爛
[17:31.27]Some douchey guy I hooked up with left it here.
[17:31.27]是一個和我交往過的衰人留下的
[17:33.19]It's all in Mexican.
[17:33.19]都是墨西哥語
[17:36.09]You know who writes good poems? Jewel.
[17:36.09]你知道誰能寫好詩嗎? Jewel
[17:39.25]Her teeth are crooked and she lived in a car.
[17:39.25]她長著歪牙 住在車里
[17:42.86]- So,she has stuff to write about. - Ta-dah!
[17:42.86]- 她才有素材可寫 - 嗒噠!
[17:58.30]Okay.
[17:58.30]好吧
[18:01.35]The Naked Man works!
[18:01.35]裸男計劃成功!
[18:02.73]I just had decent sex with an awful human being.
[18:02.73]我剛和一個爛人有一場相當不錯的性愛
[18:05.07]I am back!
[18:05.07]我浴火重生啦!
[18:06.22]Congratulations,buddy.
[18:06.22]恭喜你 兄弟
[18:08.15]You're not the only one who rocked "The ked Man" tonight.
[18:08.15]你不是今晚唯一用"裸"這招的人
[18:12.21]You just want to do it to change the subject.
[18:12.21]你這么做只是想換個話題
[18:15.16]Yeah.
[18:15.16]對
[18:16.52]Hey,that's number 49!
[18:16.52]這是第49個理由!
[18:19.24]Did it work?
[18:19.24]有效嗎?
[18:21.27]It's like I just flossed.
[18:21.27]就像我剛剔了牙
[18:23.68]I love you.
[18:23.68]我愛你
[18:25.91]That's 50.
[18:25.91]只是第50個原因
[18:27.33]Oh,yeah...
[18:27.33]對呀...
[18:29.52]Nice! What pose did you go with?
[18:29.52]太好了! 你擺的什么造型?
[18:31.18]I went with "I've got boobs."
[18:31.18]我用的是"我有胸部"的造型
[18:32.89]And she nailed it.
[18:32.89]而且她簡直棒極了
[18:36.27]Oh,my God! Guys,guys,guys! This is him!
[18:36.27]上帝啊! 同志們! 就是他!
[18:39.00]This is "The Naked Man"!
[18:39.00]這就是"裸男"!
[18:40.27]Um,Ted,his name is Mitch.
[18:40.27]Ted 他叫Mitch
[18:42.62]And,um,he's my boyfriend. So...
[18:42.62]而且 他是我的男朋友 所以...
[18:44.69]It's okay,Robin. I no longer ll "slut."
[18:44.69]沒關系 Robin 我不會再說你是蕩婦了
[18:47.15]- Oh,okay. u can go. We're done. - Thanks.
[18:47.15]- 好吧 你可以走了 這兒沒你的事了 - 謝謝
[18:50.79]Hold on,Mitch,Mitch,I have to thank you.
[18:50.79]等一下 Mitch Mitch 我得謝謝你
[18:53.67]We all tried "The Naked Man" tonight.
[18:53.67]我們今晚都試了"裸男"這招
[18:55.52]Ooh,we should see how Barney did.
[18:55.52]咱們得問問Barney怎么樣了
[19:02.13]Hello?
[19:02.13]你好?
[19:03.22]Hi,is,uh,is Barney there?
[19:03.22]嗨 Barney在嗎?
[19:04.87]No.
[19:04.87]不在
[19:06.18]Oh,my God! What's the matter with you? Get out!
[19:06.18]我的上帝! 你有什么毛病啊? 滾出去!
[19:09.41]I just have to grab my suit. It's very expensive.
[19:09.41]我得拿走我的衣服 很貴的
[19:11.23]- The tie alone... - Get out of here right now!
[19:11.23]- 就那個領帶也值... - 馬上滾出去!
[19:13.16]Get out,you sick son of a bitch!
[19:13.16]滾 你這個狗娘養(yǎng)的變態(tài)!
[19:15.72]Call me.
[19:15.72]記得給我打電話
[19:18.14]And if I see him again,I'm calling the cops.
[19:18.14]如果再讓我碰見他 我就報警
[19:24.81]Two out of three times.
[19:24.81]總有一兩個點背的
[19:27.72]Mitch,I want you to know,this night,crazy as it was,it got me out of my shell.
[19:27.72]Mitch 我想告訴你 今晚很瘋狂 同時也讓我走出陰影
[19:33.80]That's the beauty of "The Naked Man."
[19:33.80]這就是"裸男"的魅力之處
[19:35.74]It gives you exactly what you need.
[19:35.74]它能滿足你的需要...
[19:37.47]No more,no less.
[19:37.47]不多不少
[19:41.26]Now,if you'll excuse me,I need to replace one of my fantasy football quarterbacks.
[19:41.26]請原諒 我得去換下我幻想中的四分衛(wèi)了
[19:46.18]He separated his shoulder!
[19:46.18]他肩膀脫臼了!
[19:52.83]A toast... to Mitch.
[19:52.83]為Mitch干杯
[19:57.99]By the sum of his parts,he is just a man.
[19:57.99]從某方面來看 他只是個男人而已
[20:01.63]But by what he does with those parts,he becomes so much more.
[20:01.63]但從他的所作所為看 他太偉大了
[20:05.10]He may not fit society's definition of a hero,but he is the hero I needed.
[20:05.10]或許他不符合公眾對英雄的定義 但他就是我所需的英雄
[20:09.95]The hero who helped me recover from the disaster of my failed almost-marriage
[20:09.95]他是幫我從即將成功但最終 功虧一簣的婚姻中重生...
[20:13.36]and get back into thgame.
[20:13.36]并且重出江湖的英雄
[20:15.30]He lives in the shadows.
[20:15.30]他活在陰影中
[20:16.76]Is he a dream? Truth? Fiction? Damnation? Salvation?
[20:16.76]他是個夢境? 是真實 虛幻 詛咒 還是救世?
[20:20.99]He is all these things and none of them.
[20:20.99]他好像就是這一切 但是又虛無縹緲...
[20:23.08]For he is... The Naked Man.
[20:23.08]他...他就是裸男!
[20:29.33]Oh,my God!
[20:29.33]上帝啊!
[20:42.00]Oh,thank God.
[20:42.00]感謝上蒼