Although interacting with girls seems like an intimidating endeavor to many guys, adhering to certain principles allows it to be a more comfortable and enjoyable experience for everyone involved.
盡管對(duì)很多男生而言與女生交往簡(jiǎn)直是噩夢(mèng),但遵循以下幾個(gè)簡(jiǎn)單的原則將會(huì)給你帶來很多愉快的體驗(yàn)。
Steps操作步驟:
1. Be yourself. 做你自己。
It's important to maintain self confidence by being yourself around girls. If you adopt an alternate personality to attract girls, you will eventually be weighed down with the feeling that your true self isn't good enough. It may help to develop and improve your social skills, but any girls that don't appreciate you for who you are don't deserve your attention.
在與女生們交往的過程中做好自己、擁有自信是非常重要的。如果你改變自己的個(gè)性去吸引她們的話,到頭來你會(huì)感到很失落——因?yàn)檎鎸?shí)的你差勁到無法吸引女生。做你自己可以培養(yǎng)你的社交技巧,任何不欣賞你的女生都不值得你關(guān)注。
2. Respect all girls equally. 平等地尊重每個(gè)女生。
You stand a much better chance of making a good overall impression if you treat girls that don't interest you just as nicely as those that do. This doesn't mean that you need to talk to or flirt with every girl, but don't ignore them or treat them dismissively. Don't talk to a girl about other girls' attractiveness; it's distasteful and can degrade the girl's opinion of herself. You generally shouldn't talk about past relationships you've had, or other girls that interest you; it detracts from building a new relationship.
如果你將恐龍和美女一視同仁的話,這會(huì)給她們帶來深刻的印象,你也會(huì)因此得到更好的機(jī)會(huì)。這并不意味著你得同每個(gè)女生閑扯或調(diào)情,但請(qǐng)不要無視恐龍們的存在,更不要去鄙視她們。不要在一個(gè)女生面前談?wù)撈渌镊攘?,這會(huì)讓她們感到厭惡,甚至看輕自己。通常來講別扯你的那些風(fēng)流往事,或其他的女友候選人,這對(duì)建立新的關(guān)系是非常不利的。
3. Make eye contact. 眉目傳情。
Many girls like it when you can't take your eyes off them, but not when you're staring at their boobs. Although there are some girls that may enjoy such attention, you won't offend anyone by focusing on her face instead. Do not ogle her. Just remember to use discretion and show proper respect.
很多女生喜歡看到男生的目光黏在自己的身上,但是不要老盯著她們的胸部看,盡管有個(gè)別女生確實(shí)有此嗜好,你還是盯著她們的臉比較好,但可別用色迷迷的眼神。記住目光中應(yīng)該透露出你慎重以及尊敬。
4. Make them feel special. 讓她們感到很特別。
Girls like it when you're forward but not in a creepy way. Smile at her in a way that's clear, friendly, and/or playful. If you feel compelled to honesty, you can offer a sincere compliment. For example, you could say "Did anyone ever tell you that you have a beautiful smile?" Eyes are another good one--they're not the easiest thing to notice, and it shows you were looking at her face. Select something good that is reserved for her only; it will make her feel wonderfully special, admired, and beautiful.
女生們很欣賞你的勇敢,但不要嚇到她們。單純友好甚至戲虐的微笑都是可以的。如果你希望能坦誠(chéng)一些,那么可以誠(chéng)摯地恭維一下。例如,你可以說,“有人說過你的微笑很迷人嗎?”眼睛也是個(gè)不錯(cuò)的選擇,即使你不容易注意到,這也可以暗示你在認(rèn)真地看她的臉。選擇她獨(dú)有的特點(diǎn)切入,這會(huì)讓她感到擁有特別的感受,覺得自己很美麗,受人愛慕。
5. Be a gentleman. 做一個(gè)紳士。
Girls love guys that are polite and courteous. It's just a matter of doing simple things like holding doors open for them and being respectful in other ways. Some claim chivalry is dead, but if you believe that, then you're going to have some problems getting a girl's interest.
女生們喜歡那些彬彬有禮的男生。做到這一點(diǎn)也很簡(jiǎn)單——幫她們開門或者以禮相待。某些騎士時(shí)代的禮節(jié)已經(jīng)過時(shí),如果你堅(jiān)持使用,這會(huì)讓她們感到很詭異,反而會(huì)弄巧成拙。
6. Make her laugh. 逗她開心。
Being funny is one of the most attractive qualities a guy can have, and if you're not "handsome", a girl will usually overlook that! If you're not goofy but you have a very dry, sarcastic sense of humor, use that. Just watch your timing and try not to be too goofy, or you may make a fool of yourself. It's okay to tease her a little, but generally not about her appearance.
風(fēng)趣是每個(gè)男生都應(yīng)具有的品質(zhì),相比于“帥氣”,女生們更重于此。如果你智商不低,而且還擁有獨(dú)特的幽默感,那么盡管拿來用吧。把握時(shí)機(jī)也很重要,可以揶揄對(duì)方,但是原則上不要拿她的相貌來開玩笑。
7. Notice when you're having a conversation and she seems uncomfortable, change the subject. 注意碰到女生不喜歡的話題時(shí),要轉(zhuǎn)換話題。
Watch her movements, if she's shifting her weight a lot and not making eye contact, chances are she's uncomfortable.
留意她的舉動(dòng),如果你發(fā)現(xiàn)她們頻繁地變換姿勢(shì)或者與你沒有眼神的交流,那就表示她們對(duì)當(dāng)前的話題感到不適。
8. Recognize that physical contact should be limited by the state of your relationship. 肢體接觸的范圍應(yīng)依當(dāng)前所處的關(guān)系而定。
*Acquaintances--A handshake when introducing yourself is probably a reasonable limit for a first meeting. You can also subtly brush your hand against her hand or arm.
*初識(shí)。初次見面可以握握手。你的手可以輕輕地劃過她的手或胳膊。
*Casual Friends or Prospective Dates--You could try something like touching her hair or playfully poking her in the side and asking if she is ticklish. This is generally considered flirting, and if a girl doesn't appreciate your advances, it's best to apologize and refrain from making similar contact.
*臨時(shí)的朋友或約會(huì)預(yù)備隊(duì)員。摸摸她的頭發(fā),或者撓撓癢。這些會(huì)被認(rèn)為是調(diào)情,如果對(duì)方不喜歡,立即道歉并克制一點(diǎn)。
*Good Friends--It is generally acceptable to give friendly hugs to girls that you know fairly well, even if you aren't a couple. Just be sensitive to the girl's feelings about it; pressuring her to hug you will make her uncomfortable.
*好朋友。如果你們是摯友,即便不是夫妻,友善的擁抱也是可以的。但是請(qǐng)留意一下她的感覺,別壓得她太難受。
*Boyfriend/Girlfriend--When you've grown closer, you can hold her hand or wrap your arm around her shoulders or waist when you're walking together. With her consent, you can also kiss her.
*男女朋友。隨著雙方關(guān)系的日益親密,一起走的時(shí)候,你可以牽她的手,摟她的腰。征得她的同意后,你還能吻她的唇。
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