現(xiàn)代英文選評：The Jersey Heifer 杰西牛

The Jersey Heifer 杰西牛

Peggy Harding Love (1920— )

本文選自1951年的《奧·亨利獎金得獎小說集》。該集共收短篇小說二十四篇，頗多名家作品，?？思{、韋爾蒂為其尤著者。（據(jù)該書編者Herschel Brickell于序文中云：“It seems to the editor that Miss Welty and Mr. Faulkner are incomparably the present American masters of the short story.”這兩位“大師”已經(jīng)介紹。）本文作者潘琪·洛芙為一女作家，作品不多。本文借一小牛的故事，道出人生真諦，文筆清新，含意深遠(yuǎn)，的是佳作，入選并非偶然。

In October the cows went apple-crazy. The sweet, sun-warmed apple smell drifted from the orchard, tempting them unbearably; and by afternoon one or the other—the heifer usually, she was the mischief-maker—would have nudged down a rail from the old fence around the pasture. Once, only once, young Phoebe Matthews looked out the kitchen window and caught them in the act, but the picture stayed forever in her mind, an image of transcendent innocence and freedom. Leaping negligently, her hoofs tucked up delicately, the Jersey heifer went over the lower rails like a deer, and close behind, clumsy but with drooling haste, Daisy, the three-year-old Guernsey stepped clumsily out.

● apple-crazy：此字乃作者杜撰，意為“蘋果狂”，想蘋果想癡了。went= became。

● sweet和sun-warmed 兩字均形容smell。drifted：飄（來）。orchard：果園。tempting：引誘。unbearably：（引誘力極大）無法忍受。

● one or the other：不是這頭，就是那頭。這就表示只有兩頭牛。兩頭牛中，一頭是杰西（Jersey）種的小牛（heifer：尚未生育之小母牛，本文中之heifer，跳踉活潑，頑皮好弄，尚不失幼犢本色），一頭是根西（Guernsey）種的母牛，名叫“雛菊”（Daisy）。杰西、根西均為英倫海峽中英屬島嶼，兩地所產(chǎn)牛，以乳汁豐富著稱于世。

● She was the mischief-maker：禍都是她惹的；搗蛋鬼是她。

● nudged：拱（以鼻部輕推）。rail：杠（欄干上的橫條）。fence：柵欄。pasture：牧場放牛之地。本句之would表示“習(xí)慣”；have nudged表示“已經(jīng)”：到了下午，她們常常已經(jīng)推倒了柵欄上的一根橫條（逃了出去）。

● caught them in the act：當(dāng)場查獲。不是真的去把它們捉住，只是“發(fā)現(xiàn)”而已。act指它們逃出這件事。

● picture和image指的是一件事：即書中主角Phoebe在廚房窗口所看見的景象。transcendent：超越一切的。innocence：天真。蘋果甘香誘人，兩牛越藩籬，棄牧場，奔走前往，她們這一個舉動，有一次給女主人看見了。這是一幅圖畫，一幅灑落超脫、天真自由的圖畫。看見一次之后，Phoebe再也不會忘了。

● 末句就是這幅“圖畫”具體的描寫。小牛把蹄（hoofs）縮起（tucked up），姿態(tài)輕盈（delicately），隨隨便便（negligently），一躍而過，猶如小鹿一般。柵欄上每段本有橫木數(shù)條，今某一段頂上一條已被推落，高度已減，小牛自可躍過。大牛行動顢頇（clumsy），緊隨小牛之后，舉步跨出，然而迫不及待，唾液滿口（drooling）矣。

They trotted eagerly along the quiet dirt lane, turning their heads from side to side; and later, near milking time, Phoebe and Joe, her husband, had come upon them drunk with bliss in the long grass of the orchard. Each time they were discovered there, the cows stood perfectly still, their red and tawny coats bright against the blue sky, their soft, wide eyes looking out innocently among the apple branches. Long threads of saliva trailed from their velvety muzzles and glistened in the late sunlight, and under their hoofs the crushed and rotting apples gave off a heady fragrance.

● trotted：急走。lane：鄉(xiāng)間小路。dirt：灰土，路面未經(jīng)鋪修者。milking：擠牛奶。

● come upon：發(fā)現(xiàn)，撞上。drunk：陶醉。bliss=great happiness。

● tawny：褐黃色。their…coats (being) bright against the blue sky和their…eyes looking…都是nominative absolute phrases。

● saliva：唾液。threads：細(xì)線。muzzles：（獸之）口鼻突出部分。velvety：色澤光潔如絲絨者。heady：醉人的。樹上蘋果，甘香四播，蘋果成熟而落地者，香更濃郁，中人欲醉。雙牛呆立林際，蹄踐芳香，口水直流，如醉如癡。

● crushed：踏碎的。rotting：潰爛的。

Always at the sight of them there Phoebe's heart leaped in delight. But Joe would drive them back to the pasture with a slow-moving, gentle stubbornness that matched their own. "Apples cut down Daisy's milk," he told Phoebe firmly. "I've got to wire that fence."

● 雙牛陶醉于蘋果香味之中，女主人見了，如有同感，心里也喜歡得跳起來了。

● 第二句之would強(qiáng)調(diào)“意志”，有“堅欲”之意。stubbornness：倔強(qiáng)精神。雙牛堅不肯走，是為倔強(qiáng)；男主人非驅(qū)其歸不可，亦是倔強(qiáng)。可是倔強(qiáng)而不暴烈，雙方的倔強(qiáng)，都是和（gentle）緩（slow-moving）的一種。男主人這種“牛勁”，可與雙牛的相比（matched）。

● cut down：減少（產(chǎn)量）。wire當(dāng)名詞是“鐵絲”（或別種金屬線），此處是動詞，解作“張以鐵絲”。

● I've got to=I have to：我非這么做不可。

Let them go, Phoebe pleaded, begging as earnestly as for herself, "let them have a little freedom."

Well, Joe said, musing, "well," and looked off over the fields that were so newly theirs. "The apples will be picked pretty soon now anyway," he said.

● as for herself：好像替她自己懇求。她對那兩頭牛十分同情。

● musing：沉思著。newly：他們新買下來的。

● anyway：不管怎樣，“反正現(xiàn)在蘋果也快摘了”，讓兩頭牛去快樂幾天吧。

By the end of October they had picked all the apples on the trees. They knelt carefully in the long grass, collecting even the windfalls and hauling them up the wagon ramp into the upper story of the old barn for cider-making.

● windfall：給風(fēng)吹下來的果子。他們非但把樹上的蘋果全摘了，連地下的也都撿回去。hauling：拖。wagon ramp：梯道，功用如梯，然面平，無梯級，故大筐水果可以拖上；坡緩而道寬，牛也會走得上的。大車也拉得上，故用wagon一字。barn：倉。普通barn的結(jié)構(gòu)，底層養(yǎng)牲口，上層作儲藏干草谷實(shí)等之用。cider：蘋果酒。

They were pressing cider the afternoon the county agent stopped by for his first visit, and the first thing he told them was that the orchard should be cut down. Those old trees would never show a profit, he said. The orchard should go, the horses should be replaced by a tractor and modern equipment, new fences should be built, the chickens not allowed to run.

● pressing：擠壓（蘋果作酒）。the afternoon兩字作conjunction。

● county：郡（較“州”為小的行政單位）。county agent：本郡的巡回調(diào)查員，協(xié)助農(nóng)民解決各種困難者。

● 第一句中的the orchard=the trees in the orchard。profit：盈利。tractor：曳引機(jī)。modern equipment：新式配備。

After a minute Joe said: "I guess you better not put us down as farmers. We are grateful for your advice and we sure need a lot of it, but I guess we'd rather live peaceful than make money."

● put down本意是write down（記下來），這里只是“當(dāng)作，認(rèn)為”的意思。I guess=I think（通常是美國用法）。

● we'd rather=we would rather：我們寧可這樣；下面常跟著than，表示“不愿那樣”。

No, son, I'll put you down as two romantic dreamers and come around again next spring. The agent got in his car and was starting out the dirt lane when he leaned out the window again, pointing to where the pasture fence rail was down again. "Your cows are out," he called. "Who's boss around here, you or bossy?" and, laughing slyly, he jounced away in his dusty sedan.

● romantic dreamers：浪漫的夢想家。所謂“浪漫”約相當(dāng)于中文成語“不務(wù)實(shí)際”。照那調(diào)查員看來，務(wù)農(nóng)當(dāng)以謀利為目的，可是那對小夫妻自認(rèn)所要求者只是一種美麗寧靜的田園生活而已。

● leaned out the window：探首窗外。where… down again是名詞性從句。boss：主人。bossy：牛。（兩字皆美國俗語。）slyly：狡猾地。不一定有什么惡意，只是明知其可笑而笑之。jounced：顛蕩（車行不穩(wěn)）。sedan：轎車。

For a little while Phoebe and Joe stood where he left them, quiet and abstracted in the pale, slanting sunlight. Phoebe's hands were cold and sticky from the apple juice, and she held them up in the sun to warm them. At last she said, "I'd better get the cows." The orchard was stripped now, completely appleless, so she wouldn't find them there; but the scent of apples still hung everywhere in the air, filling the cows with yearning, and searching restlessly for fulfillment they still broke out of the pasture. Joe looked at Phoebe as if he hadn't heard her. "What if he's right?" he said broodingly. "Maybe it's all an impossible dream." But when Phoebe protested, "No, he's wrong! We've never been so happy," Joe smiled and touched her reassuringly, because of course it was true.

● quiet和abstracted（出神的）兩字都形容主語Phoebe and Joe。其時夕陽斜（slanting）照，日光淡弱（pale），蓋已近黃昏。Phoebe的手上蘋果汁未除，現(xiàn)在覺得冷，也覺得粘。本文以Phoebe為主角，心理活動（感覺和思想）只描寫她一個人的。牛的快樂是從她眼里看出來的，她丈夫的態(tài)度也是從她的觀點(diǎn)來寫的。

● I'd better get the cows：我還是把牛找回來吧?！痙是had的縮寫。

● stripped：果子已摘光。she wouldn't find them there中之would表示將來：到果園去是找不到它們的了。

● hung一字用得很有力量：蘋果已經(jīng)摘盡，然而香味仍遍“懸”空中，誘力不減。yearning（名詞）：戀慕之念。

● searching是分詞，形容后面的主詞they。restlessly：坐立不安地，寢食難安地。fulfillment：（欲望的）滿足。

● broodingly：若有所思地。What if he's right?中的he指調(diào)查員：他的話假如對的，便怎么呢？Joe的想法多少還切實(shí)一點(diǎn)。

● We've never been so happy=we have never been so happy as now。

● reassuringly：安慰地（使她放心）。他們結(jié)婚以來，的確是以這段田園生活為最快樂了。

In a minute Joe went back to the barn to finish pressing the last batch of cider, and Phoebe started down the lane. "Co' ba, co' ba," she sang out dreamily, taking comfort from the sound of her voice in the quiet air. It was a call for cows she had read in a book, but of course they never came.

● 他們同調(diào)查員談過話以后，Joe再回到倉房樓上去榨蘋果汁，Phoebe出去把牛找回來。

● batch：（貨物之）一批。Co' ba, co' ba：Phoebe叫牛的聲音，這種叫法她是從書上學(xué)來的。叫了它們，它們總是不來，可是她還是叫，她的叫多半還是讓自己聽來好聽而已。taking comfort from：從那里面得到安慰。

Up the lane two sets of hoofprints lay in the dust—one set large and clumsy, moving ponderously after the smaller, dancing cresents that led the way. "They can't have been out long," Phoebe said out loud to herself. "That minx, that little devil," and, smiling ruefully, looking all around, she walked on after them.

● 小路前面，有兩組（sets）蹄印：后面一組是大牛的，行動笨重（ponderously）。前面領(lǐng)路的是小牛：蹄印較小，成新月狀（crescents），步法如同舞蹈。

● They can't have been out long：它們出去了還不會很久。can在這里表示“可能性”。

● minx：輕佻的女子。這里罵的是那只小牛，罵雖罵，嘴上說它淘氣，心里還是疼它，所以罵過之后，臉上苦（ruefully）笑了一下，然后循著蹄印，跟蹤前去。

Up in the road Phoebe found the cows. They were off on the edge of the woods, nosing around in the faded goldenrod and wild asters under two ancient, half-dead crabapple trees. There was nothing there but a few dried-up, worm-hollowed crabapples, and the cows seemed apathetic, sunk in depression. "Don't look at me like that," Phoebe said, "it isn't my fault." The Jersey stared at her with great accusing eyes. She held her head low, petulantly. When Phoebe touched her muzzle, she tossed her head and leaped sharply back.

● nose（動詞）：用鼻子推、擦或掘。

● goldenrod與wild asters都是紫苑科一類的野草。faded：凋謝的；秋深之象。

● crabapple：山楂。worm-hollowed：給蟲蛀空的。There was nothing there：什么都找不到了。蘋果已全搬回家，然香味猶留林際，經(jīng)久不退，兩牛在山楂樹下草叢里去找，再也找不到了。兩牛狀甚淡漠（apathetic：看見了主人并不高興），沒精打采（sunk in depression；sunk是 sink的過去分詞，sink不一定作“沉”解，凡是由高轉(zhuǎn)低，由強(qiáng)轉(zhuǎn)弱，由活潑轉(zhuǎn)呆滯，這一類的場合常?？捎胹ink一字，請讀者隨時留意）。

● Phoebe曉得它們不高興，可是也無能為力。她對它們說：“請你們別這樣看我，這可不能怪我?！?

● accusing：控訴的。great accusing eyes：大眼睛里，一副埋怨的神氣。petulantly：發(fā)脾氣、撒嬌之狀。杰西小牛找不到蘋果，跟主人嘔氣，頭也不肯抬起來了。主人要摸摸它的嘴，它把頭一擺，猛地往后一跳。

All right, if that's the way you feel, Phoebe said. "Come on, Daisy, we'll let her sulk." And obediently Daisy lumbered back to the dusty road. She plodded slowly back toward the farm.

● Phoebe的話第一句是對小牛說的：“好吧，假如你的感覺真是這樣的話?！保偃缒阏媸沁@樣感到不痛快，那么就算了。）

● 第二句是叫大?；丶遥靶∨Ｗ屗I氣吧”。sulk：發(fā)脾氣。

● lumbered：顢頇笨重的行動。plodded：很費(fèi)力地走路。沒有腿的東西（如卡車）的行動，也可以說是lumber。plod一定要用在有腿的東西上的。lumber是從旁觀者著眼，行動看來笨重不輕快；plod是著重走路的人（或物）所費(fèi)的力氣。

Before they had gone far, Phoebe heard the quick, light thud of the Jersey's hoofs coming after them. All the way back to the barn the Jersey followed a hairbreadth behind.

● 小牛從后面追來了，它的行動是輕快的。輕快從其蹄聲知之：thud這里相當(dāng)于“蹄聲得得”。

● a hairbreadth：一發(fā)之寬，很近。

When she got back, the sun was nearly gone. She was shivering in a sweater when she went up the steep, crude stairs from the stable to the upper story, through the narrow trapdoor where they threw down the hay. Joe had finished the last batch of cider and was lining up the clear amber jugs beside the door, ready for loading on the truck to take to town. Discarded apples and the pressed-out apple cakes lay in a heap below the haymow, and in the cavernous gloom the autumn smell of apples, sweet and sour, mingled with the summer smell, dusty and sweet, of tender-cut green timothy and clover.

● 倉分兩層，上層供貯藏之用，有大梯道（wagon ramp）通外邊；下層為馬廄牛欄，另有一小梯通上層。Phoebe把牛領(lǐng)返牛欄，自己走小梯上去。時已入暮，她穿了一件絨線衫（sweater），身上冷得發(fā)抖（shivering）。

● 小梯險峻（steep）粗陋（crude），頂上是活板門一扇。樓上的干草，就是從活門里擲下來喂牲口的。

● Joe還在樓上；但是蘋果汁已經(jīng)榨完（過去完成式），此時正在把（過去進(jìn)行式）裝汁的壇子排在門口，以便次日裝車送進(jìn)城去（釀酒）。clear（明凈的）和amber（琥珀色的）都形容蘋果汁的色澤。

● 樓上本堆干草，今又蘋果滿屋，末句就是描寫這兩種氣味。本文以牛的蘋果狂為故事主干，而所以致此“狂”者，乃蘋果之香味，故于蘋果之香味，不憚再三描寫焉。

● discarded：舍棄不用的（爛蛀之蘋果，不合榨汁者）。apple cakes：榨后的蘋果渣，成餅狀。haymow：干草堆。傍晚時分，屋內(nèi)已幽暗如洞穴，在這“洞穴狀（cavernous）的幽暗（gloom）”之中，有兩種氣味，一種是蘋果的，蘋果秋天所摘，故曰“秋天的香味”（autumn smell）；一種是干草的，干草夏天所割，故曰“夏天的香味”。秋天之香甜而酸，夏天之香泥土氣（dusty）然亦帶甜味。timothy與clover兩種草名，皆用以作飼料者。tender-cut：嫩的時候割下來的。最后一從句中，autumn smell是主語，mingled是動詞。sweet and sour和dusty and sweet似乎成排比對偶，然而前者不與smell相接而跟在apples之后，后者則緊接smell，句法于對仗中仍有變化，與中文之駢儷不同也。

That heifer thinks she's pretty cute, Joe said, pulling on his leather jacket, getting ready to go. "I'll keep Daisy in tonight after milking. Maybe the Jersey won't wander without her." Leaving the wide wagon doors open to the last rays of the sun, they went out of the barn together and up the path to the house.

● pretty（副詞）：相當(dāng)?shù)?。cute：調(diào)皮。杰西小牛自以為很調(diào)皮。

● leather：革制的；jacket：上衣，衣飾店里的通用譯名為“夾克”。

● keep Daisy in：把它關(guān)在牛欄里；in是副詞。今天晚上擠牛奶過后要把它關(guān)起來，由這句話看來，足見平日是常常不關(guān)的。關(guān)了大牛，小牛還不關(guān)，他以為沒有大牛作伴，小牛就不會出去游蕩了。

● wagon doors：頂層連接wagon ramp的大門，他們走大路下去，大門沒有關(guān)，為下文伏筆。the last rays of the sun：落日余暉。

It was late that night that Phoebe woke up suddenly with her heart pounding heavily. She heard a terrible bawling cry from somewhere. "Joe, Joe," she cried, shaking him frantically, "somebody's crying terribly."

It's the heifer, Joe said, leaping out of bed and searching in the dark for his clothes. "Please light the lamp first so I can get down there first."

● pounding：（心）怦怦地跳。bawling：高聲大叫。frantically：狂亂地（拿他亂搖）。light（動詞）：點(diǎn)燃。

Dressing as fast as she could, shivering with cold and fear, she heard Joe rush out into the night. In a minute she was dressed herself and running for the barn, a lantern in her hand, through the clear, chill blackness.

● 第二句的herself用以加強(qiáng)主語she。她的丈夫穿好衣服，她也穿好了。

● 她的丈夫是往外沖進(jìn)黑夜里去（rush out into the night），她自己也在黑夜里奔，夜清明（clear）而冷（chill），正是秋夜也。

The bellowing grew closer, more localized, and she headed up the wagon ramp and through the wide door of the barn's upper story. Joe was kneeling beside the open trapdoor, the trapdoor for forking hay down to the stable. Phoebe saw the opening filled with a grotesque, meaningless shape, and then she saw it was the heifer, hanging head down in the narrow stairwell. From below, the gasping came up in rhythmic agony, hushed a little but not stopped by Joe's quiet voice talking and talking to her as he crouched at the opening, trying to see how she was caught.

● bellowing：牛鳴。localized：方位可以確定的，可以確定聲音出自何方。headed up=moved up。

● forking：以叉來挑或撥。

● 小牛從梯道上樓，一失足身陷活門。它現(xiàn)在前半身跌在活門下面，后半身還擱在上面。已經(jīng)身受重傷。stairwell=well-hole：樓梯口，即trapdoor，亦即opening或aperture（缺口）。

● a grotesque, meaningless shape：一個四不像的、不成形狀的東西。樓梯口里塞了一個奇形怪狀的東西，那東西就是小牛的后半身。

● 小牛的頭在下面，還在連吁帶喘地叫（gasping cries），叫聲抑揚(yáng)有致（rhythmic：有節(jié)奏的），然而痛苦極矣（agony）。

● cries有兩個過去分詞形容：一是hushed（使寂靜），一是stopped。Joe蹲伏（crouched）在樓梯口，輕聲撫慰，然小牛不能就此忍痛不叫，慘號只是稍歇而已。caught：卡住，掛住，絆住，牽住。

The apples, Phoebe moaned, flinging herself down beside him, "she smelled the apples and came to find them." But Joe had jumped up, taking the flashlight, and was running out and around to the stable door below. Phoebe ran after, her heart hammering, the lantern swinging insanely from her hand.

● moaned：嗚咽地說。flinging herself down：撲倒地上。

● Phoebe的話說明小牛是怎么上來的：它嗅到了香味，從梯道大門進(jìn)來找蘋果的。

● flashlight：手電筒。hammering：原意是“錘擊”，此處亦作“怦怦地跳”。insanely：（似乎是）瘋狂地。swinging：擺動。

The low, oak-beamed ceiling and thick stone walls of the stable made a warm, cozy cave, and in it the heifer hung crazily upside down, her head and one foreleg wedged between two treads of the heavy, ladder-like stairs. The wedged foreleg was broken, bone thrusting through the skin. In the lantern light her eyes rolled whitely, blindly, and the helpless, rasping cries grew steadily fainter.

● 第一句描寫樓下馬廄中所見。馬廄不高，頂上橡木作梁（oak-beam），周圍石砌厚墻，處身其間，溫暖舒適（cozy），猶如洞穴。

● crazily：荒唐地。牛頭倒懸空中，為反常之事，猶如瘋?cè)怂鶠椤?

● wedged：卡住。foreleg：前腿。treads：梯級。ladder-like stairs：ladder是可搬動之梯，stairs是樓梯。但馬廄里的stairs 比之ladder亦相差無幾。

● 在燈光之中，可以看見牛的眼睛在轉(zhuǎn)，然而白多黑少（whitely），眼珠失神（blindly），已是奄奄待斃之狀。其鳴聲粗沙（rasping）凄婉（helpless），亦漸趨微弱矣。

If we could saw the stair! Phoebe cried in anguish. "Wouldn't that free her?"

It's no use, Joe said. "The weight of her fall would snap her back, Phoebe, you'd better get the gun."

● saw：鋸斷。anguish：極端痛苦，然而深度尚不如agony。牛之將死用agony（見前文），哀憐同情之人，其心雖十分痛苦，然到底比身受者還差一籌，故用anguish。受anguish之苦者，表面上可能很少反應(yīng)；受agony之苦者，必定輾轉(zhuǎn)掙扎也。

● snap：折斷。梯子鋸斷了，牛摔下來要把背脊摔斷的。

The heifer bawled again, a hopeless choking cry, and in the lantern light her free leg kicked futilely in the air. "She's suffering, Phoebe. Get the gun."

● 牛鳴本趨微弱，現(xiàn)忽又吼叫，然而氣息壅塞（choking），臨終絕望之哀鳴也。free leg：未被卡住之腿。

Phoebe had turned blindly, and was rushing out the door when Joe called, "Phoebe, bring a knife, too, the sharp knife in the kitchen." For a moment she didn't understand, and then she turned back whimpering in horror. "No, no, we can't, I won't!" Across the shadowy stable Joe's voice rose in furious torment. "Get the knife! You know we can't waste food." He stared at her relentlessly. "We wanted a farm, didn't we? To make our own life, our own food? We've eaten meat all our lives, now we've got to earn it."

● Phoebe奔出去拿槍，要結(jié)束這條牛的痛苦了。Joe 叫她把廚房里的刀拿來。她起初還不懂，后來想起來了——Joe要先流其血然后宰而食之！

● whimper亦是一種嗚咽，與前文moan相比，則whimper之聲斷續(xù)而moan之聲細(xì)長，whimper可能含慍抱怨，而moan則純是憂傷凄楚也。

● 她已跑到門口，Joe在里面發(fā)脾氣，內(nèi)外之間，有一段距離，所以說：他的聲音“越過了幽暗的馬廄”（across the shadowy stable）。

● Joe's voice rose：提起了嗓子說話。furious：盛怒的。torment較anguish略輕，Joe決定忍心殺牛，心里也必非常痛苦，然而比之Phoebe的anguish究還差一籌。此字帶一點(diǎn)“煩躁”的意思。

● stared：瞪目而視。relentlessly：慘酷無情地，不稍寬待地。waste：糟蹋。牛打死了，他舍不得不吃。

● earn：憑本事去賺。

● 最后兩句問話的意義：我們買下這座農(nóng)場來，本來是靠著它吃的。

Phoebe laid the knife, the gun and cartridges beside Joe and turned away. She was well away from the stable when she heard the shot. She stopped then, and for a long moment she stood quiet, shaking in the cold.

After her tears Phoebe slept, but she woke early. She lay quietly in bed, her body aching, her mind calm but filled with a clear despair.

● cartridges：子彈。clear despair：清明的絕望。她覺得人生沒有意義了，

可是心頭還是清清楚楚的，并不昏沉。

She went out for fire wood and kindling, and coming back from the woodpile with her arms full she stopped above the pasture, shivering in the still, gray light of the morning. Below the pin oak Daisy lay placidly on the drying grass, untouched by tragedy, and for a long time Phoebe stood watching her from another world. Of course they can't care, she thought; it's part of their innocence. She thought of all the innocent ones—the cow and the dog, the horses and chickens—and she knew at last that she was hopelessly excluded, forever responsible. She turned away, lonely and chilled, but with her armful of firewood she went on into the kitchen, to kindle once more the comforting fire for breakfast.

● kindling：引火之小木片。woodpile：木柴堆。

● pin oak：橡樹之一種。placidly：平靜地。untouched by tragedy：（心）不為悲劇所拂擾。from another world=as if from another world：小牛死了，大牛本為其游伴，今竟若無其事，而女主人則中心悲苦，無復(fù)樂趣，如處在另一世界。

● she thought的前后都是不加引號的直接敘述法；述其思想之內(nèi)容：“當(dāng)然它們（那些動物）是不在乎的，這就是它們天真里面的一部分。”既然天真，當(dāng)然無掛無牽。

● 下面接一句是全文主旨所在。她想起了那些動物都是無掛無牽的，可是她偏不然，她是“絕對沒有希望歸入它們那一類里去的”（hopelessly excluded），她是人就得負(fù)起做人的責(zé)任，責(zé)任永遠(yuǎn)在她身上，無法推脫（forever responsible）。

● 這一種想法是幻想的破滅，也可以說是智慧（wisdom）的開始。鳶飛魚躍，生機(jī)活潑，嘯傲園林，逍遙自在，素為人生理想所寄，叵奈現(xiàn)實(shí)世界不容此種理想乎？Phoebe初居農(nóng)村時，未嘗不想過一種無掛無牽順乎自然的生活，對于遨游田野追逐蘋果香味的小牛，未嘗不心向往之。曾幾何時，小牛身陷絕境，喪生槍下；當(dāng)初放縱之者，歆羨之者，今竟束手不能救，而且可能要割其皮而食其肉，“分嘗一臠”矣?，F(xiàn)實(shí)世界果如是之殘酷乎？無論如何，Phoebe經(jīng)此事變，心靈上可以說是成熟了。浪漫之夢既破，提起勇氣，正視現(xiàn)實(shí)，負(fù)起做人的責(zé)任，其人生之正途乎？就文學(xué)流派而言：追求理想，無拘無束，是浪漫主義之文學(xué)也；知理想之終歸幻滅，拘束之不可避免，此寫實(shí)主義之文學(xué)也。寫實(shí)主義在二十世紀(jì)文學(xué)為一大潮流，本文不過一小小的例子而已。

● 最后Phoebe挾了木柴，進(jìn)廚房去生火煮飯，又是一天枯燥的主婦生活要開始了。然而人生的意義是不是就在這枯燥平凡之中呢？