Although close relationships are often wellsprings of health-enhancing support, accumulating evidence indicates that persistent domestic conflict deals a blow to the body—and especially the heart. In one of the latest studies, researchers found that British adults who were in adverse close relationships were 34 percent more likely to suffer coronary problems, ranging from chest pain to deadly heart attacks, than those who weren't. Numerous American studies have produced similar findings. Last year, for example, a long-term analysis of more than 1,000 marriages found that strained matrimonies take a clear toll on physical health over time, hitting the elderly the hardest.
Negativity-plagued relationships are toxic in part because of the effects of chronic stress, says Sheldon Cohen, a Carnegie Mellon University psychologist. In addition to damaging the heart, ongoing stress can deplete the immune system—creating openings for colds, cancers, and other maladies—and also lead to depression and risky coping behaviors like excessive drinking.
People who endure persistent interpersonal problems are more at risk than those reeling from an isolated blowup, Cohen says. But spouses aren't the only potential source of unrelenting trouble. In the recent British study, 20 percent of adults identified someone other than a romantic partner as the object of their closest relationship, according to the report in the October 8 issue of Archives of Internal Medicine.
Fortunately, strategies for minimizing feuds within the family are similar to those that can resolve conflicts with in-laws, coworkers, neighbors, and others, says Redford Williams, a behavioral scientist at Duke University. One technique he recommends is this: Before lashing someone with a sharp-tongued comment, step back and evaluate a brewing dispute. Say it's your turn to host the annual holiday family feast. Frazzled, juggling food prep for 20 people with a maniacal effort to scrub everything clean, you finally feel pleased by your home's facelift. Then the doorbell rings. In strides your 84-year-old aunt, craning her neck to eyeball the surroundings. “Well, you certainly don't pay much attention to keeping your house tidy,” she barks, flinging her coat over your outstretched arms. “If we did what came naturally, we'd either explode or keep fuming for the rest of the day,” Williams says. Instead, he suggests, ask yourself four questions: Is this situation important?
After years studying the strain hostility and anger place on the heart, he and his wife, also a doctor, have developed a system called Williams LifeSkills. A 2005 study found that when people with heart disease used Williams's techniques, their anger levels, average blood pressure, and blood pressure elevation when angry all went down; their depression and anxiety diminished; and they reported being more satisfied with family and friends.
Nevertheless, the holidays tend to strap everyone with a little extra stress, so make an effort to be on your best behavior, especially if you're prone to conflict, says Williams. But if family fighting's become an annual theme, there might be something wrong.
Not all conflict is bad, according to Harvard University lecturer Tal Ben-Shahar, author of the new book Happier: Learn the Secrets to Daily Joy and Lasting Fulfillment. “Negativity is normal, as long as it's outweighed by positivity,” he says. “No negativity at all is actually a bad sign” that people may be avoiding serious issues.
1. From the first paragraph, it can be inferred that _____.
[A] close relationship between matrimonies is a double-edged sword
[B] adverse close relationship leads to high risk of coronary problems
[C] strained relationship within family will cut short one's normal span of life
[D] numerous studies have proved the devastating effect of close relationship
2. Negative close relationship may lead to the following diseases except _____.
[A] coronary problems
[B] immune system disorder
[C] psychosis
[D] depression and anxiety
3. By the technique recommended by Redford Williams, the author implies that _____.
[A] one should be reasonable so as to keep good relationship with intimate partners
[B] one should divert oneself from the furious state so as to minimize family conflicts
[C] it is not so difficult to lessen the conflicts within the family
[D] you'd better think the other way when potential conflict is under your nose
4. The strategy for minimizing conflicts in the family suggested by Redford Williams is that _____.
[A] people should undertake housework on one's own
[B] people should choose a brewing dispute rather than a sharp-tongued comment
[C] people should weigh if it is worth of having a feud
[D] people should learn to hold their anger when something unpleasant happens
5. Which one of the following statements is TRUE of Tal Ben-Shahar's opinions on family conflict?
[A] Family conflict is necessary for maintaining the positivity in close relationship.
[B] Lack of family conflict will make people void of serious issues.
[C] Negativity in close relationship can indeed improve the relationship positively.
[D] Modest family conflict will do little harm to close relationship.
1. From the first paragraph, it can be inferred that _____.
[A] close relationship between matrimonies is a double-edged sword
[B] adverse close relationship leads to high risk of coronary problems
[C] strained relationship within family will cut short one's normal span of life
[D] numerous studies have proved the devastating effect of close relationship
1. 從第一段可以推斷出 _____。
[A] 婚姻關(guān)系中的親密關(guān)系是一把雙刃劍
[B] 親人之間的敵對關(guān)系能導(dǎo)致患心臟病的高風(fēng)險
[C] 緊張的家庭關(guān)系會縮短人的正常壽命
[D] 很多研究都證明了親密關(guān)系的破壞性影響
答案:A 難度系數(shù):☆☆☆☆
分析:推理題。第一段提到,糟糕的家庭關(guān)系會有損人的健康,但是好的親密關(guān)系是健康的源泉。那么選項(xiàng)A是正確的表述。選項(xiàng)B在文章中有相應(yīng)的論述,指出糟糕的關(guān)系會影響人的健康,但是該選項(xiàng)的表述過于絕對——糟糕的關(guān)系和心臟病之間的關(guān)系并不是絕對的,風(fēng)險只高出34%。選項(xiàng)C,提到了糟糕的關(guān)系會影響人的健康,但并未明確提到是減少壽命。選項(xiàng)D的表述是錯誤的,其破壞性影響的不是親密關(guān)系,而是糟糕的關(guān)系。因此,只有選項(xiàng)A是正確的。
2. Negative close relationship may lead to the following diseases except _____.
[A] coronary problems
[B] immune system disorder
[C] psychosis
[D] depression and anxiety
2. 糟糕的關(guān)系可能引發(fā)下列除 _____ 外的疾病。
[A] 心臟病
[B] 免疫系統(tǒng)疾病
[C] 精神病
[D] 抑郁和焦慮
答案:D 難度系數(shù):☆☆☆
分析:推理題。文章第二段提到:Negativity-plagued relationships are toxic in part because of the effects of chronic stress, says Sheldon Cohen, a Carnegie Mellon University psychologist. In addition to damaging the heart, ongoing stress can deplete the immune system—creating openings for colds, cancers, and other maladies—and also lead to depression and risky coping behaviors like excessive drinking. 顯然,選項(xiàng)A、B和C都符合這一段中說明的各種疾病,只有選項(xiàng)D,文章中沒有提到焦慮,因此D是正確答案。
3. By the technique recommended by Redford Williams, the author implies that _____.
[A] one should be reasonable so as to keep good relationship with intimate partners
[B] one should divert oneself from the furious state so as to minimize family conflicts
[C] it is not so difficult to lessen the conflicts within the family
[D] you'd better think the other way when potential conflict is under your nose
3. 作者提到Redford Williams推薦的方法,作者想要表明的是 _____。
[A] 人們應(yīng)當(dāng)保持理智,以便與親密的人維持好的關(guān)系
[B] 人們應(yīng)當(dāng)將自己從憤怒的狀態(tài)中解脫出來,以此來減少家庭沖突
[C] 減少家庭紛爭并不是件很困難的事情
[D] 如果馬上就要發(fā)生沖突,最好換個角度考慮
答案:C 難度系數(shù):☆
分析:推理題。第四段第一句是說,減少家庭沖突的方法和解決姻親、同事、鄰居以及與其他人的矛盾的方法差不多,緊接著就列舉了這樣的方法,由此可以看出,作者是為了說明解決家庭矛盾并不是很難。因此,選項(xiàng)C為正確答案。
4. The strategy for minimizing conflicts in the family suggested by Redford Williams is that _____.
[A] people should undertake housework on one's own
[B] people should choose a brewing dispute rather than a sharp-tongued comment
[C] people should weigh if it is worth of having a feud
[D] people should learn to hold their anger when something unpleasant happens
4. Redford Williams提到的減少家庭矛盾的策略是 _____。
[A] 人們應(yīng)該主動承擔(dān)家務(wù)
[B] 人們應(yīng)當(dāng)選擇尖刻的爭吵,而不是尖酸的評論
[C] 人們應(yīng)當(dāng)衡量一下值不值得發(fā)生沖突
[D] 人們應(yīng)當(dāng)在發(fā)生不愉快的事情時控制自己的情緒
答案:C 難度系數(shù):☆☆☆
分析:推理題。第四段提到了這個策略,就是在準(zhǔn)備向某個人發(fā)起刻薄的言語攻擊時,先退后一步,斟酌一下吵架的價值。而最后也提到了要問問自己:這很重要嗎?可以看出,主要是要求人們衡量一下這種代價值不值得。因此,選項(xiàng)C是正確答案。
5. Which one of the following statements is TRUE of Tal Ben-Shahar's opinions on family conflict?
[A] Family conflict is necessary for maintaining the positivity in close relationship.
[B] Lack of family conflict will make people void of serious issues.
[C] Negativity in close relationship can indeed improve the relationship positively.
[D] Modest family conflict will do little harm to close relationship.
5. 關(guān)于Tal Ben-Shahar對于家庭沖突的看法,下列哪項(xiàng)陳述是正確的?
[A] 家庭沖突對于保持親密關(guān)系的積極的一面是必要的。
[B] 缺少家庭沖突會讓人們避免一些重大的事情。
[C] 親密關(guān)系中的負(fù)面性能夠積極地改進(jìn)這種關(guān)系。
[D] 輕微的家庭沖突對親密關(guān)系幾乎沒有什么損害。
答案:D 難度系數(shù):☆☆☆☆
分析:細(xì)節(jié)題。第七段提到了Tal Ben-Shahar的觀點(diǎn),他認(rèn)為只要家庭的主旋律是和諧的,那么有點(diǎn)沖突并不一定不好,如果真的什么矛盾都沒有,那么可能就是出現(xiàn)嚴(yán)重的問題了。選項(xiàng)中,D符合他的看法。而選項(xiàng)A、B和C都是對他的觀點(diǎn)比較極端和錯誤的理解。
雖然親密的關(guān)系往往是健康之源,但是越來越多的證據(jù)顯示,持續(xù)的家庭紛爭會對身體造成危害,特別是對心臟來說。在最近的一次研究中,研究人員發(fā)現(xiàn),關(guān)系不好的英國成年人患心臟病的幾率要比那些沒有這種情況的人高34%,心臟病的程度小到胸口疼、大到致命的心臟病發(fā)作。美國人進(jìn)行的大量研究也發(fā)現(xiàn)了同樣的情況。比如,去年的一項(xiàng)對1,000多對夫婦的長期分析發(fā)現(xiàn),緊張的婚姻關(guān)系對身體健康有明顯的影響,特別是對年紀(jì)大的人來說。
那種折磨人的消極關(guān)系是有害的,部分是因?yàn)槁詨毫Φ挠绊?,卡耐?middot;梅隆大學(xué)的心理醫(yī)師Sheldon Cohen說。除了會對心臟有損害外,持續(xù)不斷的壓力會破壞免疫系統(tǒng),為感冒、癌癥和其他疾病帶來可乘之機(jī),也會引發(fā)抑郁和危險的行為,如飲酒過量。
那些有長期人際關(guān)系問題的人比那些挺過喪偶或離婚打擊的人要面臨更大的風(fēng)險,Cohen說。但是夫妻關(guān)系并不是持續(xù)不斷的麻煩唯一的潛在根源。根據(jù)10月8日的《內(nèi)科醫(yī)學(xué)檔案》上的一份報告,在英國最新的一項(xiàng)研究中,20%的成年人認(rèn)為除配偶外,還有其他人與他們有親密關(guān)系。
幸運(yùn)的是,減少家庭沖突的方法同解決與姻親、同事、鄰居及其他人的矛盾的方法差不多,杜克大學(xué)的行為科學(xué)家Redford Williams說。他推薦的一個方法是:在準(zhǔn)備向某個人發(fā)起刻薄的言語攻擊時,先退后一步,斟酌一下是否要吵架。比如,這次輪到你主持每年一度的節(jié)日家庭聚餐了。你在準(zhǔn)備了20個人的食物后又費(fèi)勁地把所有的東西弄干凈,最后雖然疲憊不堪,但看到家里面貌一新總算感覺欣慰了。這時門鈴響了,你84歲的姨媽邁步走了進(jìn)來,伸長脖子把四周掃視了一遍。“噢,你肯定沒有注意保持家里的整潔,”她大叫著,把自己的外套扔到你伸出的胳膊上。“很自然地,我們會勃然大怒,或者會在這一天剩下的時間里悶悶不樂。”Williams說。但是,他建議我們應(yīng)該問自己四遍這個問題:這種情形很重要嗎?
對敵意和怒氣對于心臟的影響研究了數(shù)年之后,他和同為醫(yī)生的妻子開發(fā)出了一種名為威廉姆斯生命技能的系統(tǒng)。2005年的一次研究發(fā)現(xiàn),有心臟疾病的人使用威廉姆斯技術(shù)后,在發(fā)怒時他們的憤怒程度、平均血壓和發(fā)怒時血壓升高的癥狀都有所降低,抑郁和焦慮也有所減少,并且他們稱,對自己與家人及朋友之間的關(guān)系也更加滿意了。
但是,節(jié)假日可能會讓每個人都有點(diǎn)小小的額外的壓力,所以努力讓自己表現(xiàn)得好些,尤其在你就要與人發(fā)生沖突的時候,威廉姆斯這樣說。但是如果家庭沖突成為每年的主題,那么可能就真的有什么問題了。
并不是所有的沖突都不好,哈佛大學(xué)的講師Tal Ben-Shahar說,他出版了新書《快樂點(diǎn):掌握每天快樂和長期幸福的秘訣》。“消極的情緒是正常的,只要積極的情緒能戰(zhàn)勝它。”他說。“如果沒有消極的情緒,反而是一個危險的信號”,人們可能忽視了一些重要的問題。