1. Take a deep breath.深呼吸。
The moment you realize you've made a big mistake is usually not the best time to take action to correct it. Any action you take when you're in panic mode is likely to make the problem worse.
當(dāng)你意識到自己犯錯的時候絕不是改正錯誤的最佳時機(jī)。任何在焦慮情況下做的事通常只會讓事情更糟。
For example, suppose you blurt out in a meeting with your boss and Customer A that your company gave Customer B a huge discount. You immediately realize that bringing up that discount means Customer A will probably demand a similar discount.
假設(shè)你不小心在老板和客戶A的會議上說出你們公司給客戶B很大的折扣,你馬上意識到提到折扣會讓客戶A也提出相同要求。
Trying to recover on the spot is a bad idea. If you tell the customer, "Of course, big discounts aren't our usual policy," you'll only call more attention to the discount. Same thing if you apologize to your boss the moment the two of you leave the meeting.
試圖馬上彌補絕不是個好主意。如果你告訴客戶A:“當(dāng)然我們一般不會提供較大的折扣。”只會將大家的注意力再次轉(zhuǎn)移到折扣上來。會議結(jié)束后馬上向老板道歉也是一樣的。
So take a deep breath, shake yourself out, maybe go for a short walk. Get a little distance from the situation before you react.
所以深呼吸,清醒一下,出去散個步。在你做出反應(yīng)之前離開一段時間。
2. Take a dose of perspective.長遠(yuǎn)地看待問題
Although your blunder may seem monumental to you, it may be far less significant to the other people involved.
也許你犯的錯誤對你自己很重要,但對其他相關(guān)的人來說就沒那么重要了。
If your mistake is uncharacteristic, chances are that people who already know you will simply put it down to your having a bad day. That doesn't mean you don't need to make amends, but the situation may be less dire than you assume.
如果你的錯誤不典型,很可能了解你的人知道之后不會再提起這件事,畢竟你這一天都不太好過。但這不意味著你不需要彌補,只是結(jié)果可能沒你想得那么糟。
3. Do a reality check.檢驗實際影響。
Now that you've gotten some distance and perspective, revisit your blunder with the other people who witnessed it. Find out how much damage has been done by putting your inquiry in the form of a question, like:
冷靜下來仔細(xì)思考后,你需要回訪一下看見你犯錯的人。問一些問題,找出自己的錯誤到底造成了多大傷害,比如:
"John, when I reacted negatively to your idea earlier today, I think I might have been overly harsh. I want to make certain you know that I'm not trying to be a pill and that my heart is in the right place."
“約翰,今天我對你的想法反應(yīng)很消極,也許我過分了一點。我想確定你了解我不是要反對,而且我是出于好心。”
Reality checks are best delivered via email rather than in person, because email gives everyone the opportunity to cool down.
回訪最好通過郵件而不是面對面進(jìn)行,因為郵件給了每個人冷靜的機(jī)會。
4. Apologize and address the blowback.道歉并處理后續(xù)問題。
The response that you get from your reality check in the previous step lets you gauge what you'll need to do to get beyond the mistake. For example, if the response is something like "You screwed up badly, you jerk," some groveling may be in order.
根據(jù)從他人那得到的反饋,你就可以知道自己應(yīng)該如何做才能彌補。如果你得到的回應(yīng)是“你搞砸了,混蛋”,也許你就該低頭認(rèn)錯了。
On the other hand, if the response is more like "Yeah, I was offended/angry/surprised, but it's no big deal," your apology can be more perfunctory:
但是如果回應(yīng)是“對啊,當(dāng)時我感覺被冒犯了/很生氣/很吃驚,但是沒什么大不了的,”你的道歉就可以相對草率一點:
"John, I'm really sorry that I overreacted and would like to meet with you to apologize in person and make a commitment to never allow myself to act that way in the future."
“約翰,我非常抱歉自己反應(yīng)過度了,我想當(dāng)面和你道個歉并保證自己再不會這樣了。”
Shortcut: When you've screwed up
速成方法:當(dāng)你搞砸了
• DON'T try to fix things immediately; take some time to think.
• 不要馬上彌補;先思考。
• REMEMBER that eventually nobody will care what happened.
• 記住最后可能沒人關(guān)心發(fā)生了什么。
• FIND out how seriously you screwed up.
• 找出你犯的錯到底有多嚴(yán)重。
• MAKE apologies but focus on fixing the results.
• 道歉但是著重彌補結(jié)果。
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