Given the many ways that communication can be disrupted and distorted, we can only marvel at the extent to which negotiators can actually understand each other. Failures and distortions in perception, cognition, and communication are the paramount contributors to breakdowns and failures in negotiation. Research consistently demonstrates that even those parties whose goals are compatible or integrative may fail to reach agreement or reach suboptimal agreements because of the misperceptions of the other party or because of breakdowns in the communication process. Just as we can evaluate the quality of a deal that results from negotiation, we can evaluate the quality of communication-its efficiency and effectiveness-that occurs in the interaction leading to a given deal.
Three main techniques are available for improving communication in negotiation: the use of questions, listening, and role reversal.
The Use of Questions
Questions are essential elements in negotiations for securing information; asking good questions enables negotiators to secure a great deal of information about the other party’s position, supporting arguments, and needs. Questions can be divided into two basic categories: those that are manageable and those that are unmanageable and cause difficulty. Manageable questions cause attention or prepare the other person’s thinking for further questions (“May I ask you a question?”), get information (“How much will this cost?”), and generate thoughts (“Do you have any suggestions for improving this?”).
Unmanageable questions cause difficulty, give information (“Didn’t you know that we couldn’t afford this?”), and bring the discussion to a false conclusion (“Don’t you think we’ve talked about this enough?”). Unmanageable questions are more likely to elicit defensiveness and anger from the other party. Although these questions may yield information, they may also make the other party feel uncomfortable and less willing to provide information in the future.
Negotiators can also use questions to manage difficult or stalled negotiations. Aside from their typical uses for collecting and diagnosing information or assisting the other party in addressing and expressing needs and interests, questions can also be used tactically to pry or lever a negotiation out of a breakdown or an apparent dead end. The value of such questions seems to be in their power to assist or force. the other party to confront the effects or consequences of his or her behavior, intended and anticipated or not.