12 麥田里的守望者
Old Phoebe said something then,but I couldn't hear her.She had the side of her mouth right smack on the pillow, and I couldn't hear her.
老菲碧這時說了句什么話,我沒聽清。她把一個嘴角整個兒壓在枕頭上,所以我聽不清她說的話。
"What?" I said. "Take your mouth away. I can't hear you with your mouth that way."
“什么?”我說,“把你的頭拿開。你這樣把嘴壓著,我根本聽不清你在說什么。”
"You don’t like anything that' s happening.”
“你不喜歡正在發(fā)生的事情,所有的。”
It made me even more depressed when she said that.
她這么一說,我心里不由得更煩了。
"Yes I do. Yes I do. Sure I do. Don't say that. Why the hell do you say that?"
“我喜歡,我喜歡,我當(dāng)然喜歡。別說這種話。你干嗎要說這種見鬼的話呢?”
"Because you don't. You don’t like any schools. You don't like a million things. You don’t."
“因為你不喜歡。你討厭上學(xué)。你討厭好多東西。你不喜歡。”
"I do! That' s where you're wrong—that's exactly where you’re wrong! Why the hell do you have to say that?" I said. Boy, was she depressing me.
“我喜歡!你錯就錯在這里—你完完全全錯在這里!你為什么非要說這種見鬼的話呢?”我說。天哪,她真讓我煩透了。
"Because you don't," she said. "Name one thing."
“因為你不喜歡,”她說。“說一樣?xùn)|西讓我聽聽。”
"One thing? One thing I like?0 I said. "Okay."
“說一樣?xùn)|西?一樣我喜歡的東西?”我說,“好吧。”
The trouble was, I couldn't concentrate too hot. Sometimes it' s hard to concentrate.
問題是,我沒法集中思想。思想有時候是很難集中的。
"One thing I like a lot you mean?" I asked her.
“你是說,一樣我非常喜歡的東西?”我問她。
She didn't answer me,though. She was in a cock-eyed position way the hell over the other side of the bed. She was about a thousand miles away. "C'mon, answer me," I said. "One thing I like a lot, or one thing I just like?"
她沒作聲。她躺在床的另一邊,斜著眼看我。感覺好像離得很遠(yuǎn)。“喂,回答我,”我說。“是一樣我非常喜歡的東西呢,還是我喜歡的東西就行?”
"You like a lot."
“你非常喜歡的。”
"Anyway, I like it now,"I said. "I mean right now. Sitting here with you and just chewing the fat and horsing—”
“不管怎樣,我喜歡現(xiàn)在這樣,”我說。“我是說就像現(xiàn)在這樣,跟你一起坐著,聊聊天,逗逗樂……”
"That isn't anything really!"
“這可不是什么真正的東西!”
"It is so something realty! Certainly it is! Why the hell isn't it? People never think anything is anything really. I’m getting goddam sick of it."
“這是真正的東西!當(dāng)然是的!他媽的為什么不是?人們就是不把真正的東西當(dāng)東西看待。我他媽的都膩煩透這個了。”
"Stop swearing. All right,name something else. Name something you'd like to be. Like a scientist. Or a lawyer or something."
“別罵啦。好吧,說些別的吧,說說你的理想吧。你是想當(dāng)個科學(xué)家呢,還是想當(dāng)個律師什么的。”
"l couldn't be a scientist. I'm no good in science.”
“我當(dāng)不了科學(xué)家,我不懂科學(xué)。”
"Well, a lawyer一like Daddy and all."
“那,當(dāng)個律師,像爸爸一樣。”
"Lawyers are all right, I guess一but it doesn't appel to me," I said. "I mean they're all right if they go around saving innocent guy's lives all the time, and like that, but you don't do that kind of stuff if you're a lawyer. All you do is make a lot of dough and play golf and play bridge and buy cars and drink Martinis and look like a hotshot. And besides. Even if you did go around saving guys' lives and all, how would you know if you did it because you really wanted to save guys' lives, or because you did it because what you really wanted to do was be a terrific lawyer, with everybody slapping you on the back and congratulating you in court when the goddam trial was over, the reporters and everybody, the way it is in the dirty movies? How would you know you weren't being a phony? The trouble is, you wouldn't."
“律師倒是不錯,我想—可是不適合我,”我說。“我是說他們要是老出去搭救受冤枉的人的性命,那倒是不錯,可你一旦當(dāng)了律師,就不干那樣的事了。你只知道掙大錢,打高爾夫球,打橋牌,買汽車,喝馬提尼酒,擺臭架子。再說,即便你真的出去救人了,你怎么知道這樣做到底是因為你真的想要救人性命呢,還是因為你真正的動機(jī)是想當(dāng)一個大律師,等審判一結(jié)束,那些記者什么的就會向你涌來,向你道賀,就像那些下流電影里演的那樣?你怎么知道自己不是個偽君子?問題是,你根本就不知道。”
I'm not too sure old Phoebe knew what the hell I was talking about. I mean she's only a little child and all. But she was listening, at least. If somebody at least listens, it's not too bad.
我不知道我說的那些話老菲碧到底聽懂了多少,我是說她畢竟還是個小孩子。不過她至少在好好聽著。只要對方在聽,那就不錯了。
"Daddy's going to kill you. He's going to kill you,"she said.
“爸爸會要了你的命。他會要了你的命,”她說。
I wasn't listening, though. I was thinking about something else—something crary."You know what I'd like to be?"I said."You know what I'd like to be? I mean if I had my goddam choice?"
可我沒在聽,我在想一些別的事—一些異想天開的事。“你知道我將來想做什么嗎?”我說。“你知道我將來想做什么嗎?我是說將來要是能他媽的讓我自由選擇的話。”
"What? Stop swearing."
“什么?別罵啦。”
"You know that song‘If a body catch a body comin' through the rye’?I’d like—”
“你知道《你要是在麥田里捉到了我》這首歌嗎?我將來想—”
"It' s'If a body meet a body coming through the rye'!”old Phoebe said. "It's a poem. By Robert Burns."
“是《你要是在麥田里遇到了我》!”老菲碧說。“這是一首詩,羅伯特·彭斯寫的。”
"I know it' s a poem by Robert Burns."
“我知道那是羅伯特·彭斯寫的詩!”
She was right, though. It is "If a body meet a body coming through the rye." I didn't know it then, though.
她說得對。那的確是《你要是在麥田里遇到了我》。可我當(dāng)時并不知道。
"I thought it was‘If a body catch a body',”I said. "Anyway, I keep picturing all these little kids playing some game in this big field of rye and all. Thousands of little kids,and nobody's around-nobody big, I mean,except me. And I’m standing on the edge of some crazy cliff. What I have to do, I have to catch everybody if they start to go over the cliff-I mean if they're running and they don't look where they're going I have to come out from somewhere and catch them. That's all I'd do all day. I' d just be the catcher in the rye and all.I know it's crazy, but that's the only thing I'd really like to be/know it's crazy.”
“我還以為是《你要是在麥田里捉到了我》呢,”我說。“不管怎樣,我老是在幻想著有那么一群小孩子在一大塊麥田里做游戲,很多個小孩子,附近沒有一個人,我是說,除了我以外,沒有一個大人。我呢,就站在懸崖邊。我做的就是在那兒守望,要是有哪個孩子往懸崖邊奔來,我就把他拉住—我是說孩子們都在狂奔,也不知道自己是在往哪兒跑,我得從什么地方出來,把他們拉住。我整天就干這樣的事。我只想當(dāng)個麥田里的守望者。我知道這有點異想天開,可我真正喜歡干的就是這個。我知道這不像話。”
Old Phoebe didn't say anything for a long time. Then, when she said something, all she said was, "Daddy's going to kill you."
老菲碧有好一會兒沒吭聲。后來她開口了,可她只說了句:“爸爸會要了你的命。”
作者介紹:
杰羅姆·大衛(wèi)·塞林格(1919-),美國作家,他的《麥田里的守望者》被認(rèn)為是二十世紀(jì)美國文學(xué)的經(jīng)典作品之一。塞林格在1942年從軍,1944年他前往歐洲戰(zhàn)場從事反間諜工作。1946年塞林格退伍,回到紐約開始專心創(chuàng)作。他的第一本長篇小說《麥田里的守望者》一經(jīng)出版就大獲成功。他的作品還有《弗蘭尼與卓?!?、《木匠們,把屋梁升高》和《西摩:一個介紹》和收錄了他的短篇故事的《九故事》。
本書以主人公霍爾頓自敘的語氣講述自己被學(xué)校開除后在紐約城游蕩將近兩晝夜的經(jīng)歷和感受?;魻栴D是個個性復(fù)雜而又矛盾的青少年的典型。他有一顆純潔善良、追求美好生活和崇高理想的童心。他對那些熱衷于女人和酒的人十分反感,對校長的虛偽勢利非常厭惡,看到墻上的下流字眼便憤憤擦去,遇到修女為受難者募捐就慷慨解囊。他對妹妹菲碧真誠愛護(hù),百般照顧??墒?,憤世嫉俗思想引起的消極反抗,他抽煙、酗酒、打架、調(diào)情,甚至找妓女玩。他認(rèn)為成人社會里沒有一個人可信,全是“假仁假義的偽君子”。他看不慣現(xiàn)實社會中的那種世態(tài)人情,他渴望的是樸實和真誠,但遇到的全是虛偽和欺騙,而他又無力改變這種現(xiàn)狀,只好苦悶、仿徨、放縱,最后甚至想逃離這個現(xiàn)實世界。