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名人演講:追隨自己的心聲,你們一定會成功[奧普拉]

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2018年04月22日

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Follow Your Gut and You Will Be a Huge Success 追隨自己的心聲,你們一定會成功

——Oprah Winfrey 奧普拉_溫弗瑞

Follow Your Gut and You Will Be a Huge Success 追隨自己的心聲,你們一定會成功 Oprah Winfrey 奧普拉_溫弗瑞
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  • [00:01.57]Oh, yes,
  • [00:02.68]I'm going to have everyone
  • [00:03.48]call me Doctor now.
  • [00:05.71]Thank you,
  • [00:06.63]President Brodhead.
  • [00:08.23]Ladies and gentlemen
  • [00:09.97]and graduates,
  • [00:11.31]and especially to all the mothers here
  • [00:13.81]will all the mothers stand,
  • [00:15.29]so we can say
  • [00:16.58]Happy Mother's Day?
  • [00:19.88]Happy Mother's Day to you.
  • [00:27.23]What a great day to celebrate mothers.
  • [00:34.90]You love me still,
  • [00:35.52]even though I'm a doctor now?
  • [00:39.41]Well, I wanted to just say,
  • [00:40.80]first of all,
  • [00:41.44]thank you for the doctorate degree,
  • [00:43.97]and I'm so happy to be here,
  • [00:45.37]and I'm here because
  • [00:46.26]someone I love
  • [00:48.78]is graduating today,
  • [00:50.52]my godson,
  • [00:51.53]William Bumpus,
  • [00:57.81]the son of Will Bumpus
  • [01:00.84]and my best friend, Gayle.
  • [01:02.88]You know,
  • [01:03.32]William never wants people
  • [01:04.78]to know that he knows me,
  • [01:07.85]and his sister, Kirby,
  • [01:09.68]never did either.
  • [01:11.27]I'm like the crazy aunt
  • [01:12.12]they keep in the attic,
  • [01:14.83]and they let me out
  • [01:15.45]to do commencements,
  • [01:19.51]so here I am.
  • [01:21.66]I just want to say
  • [01:22.78]I knew William before he was born.
  • [01:26.34]I saw the sonogram,
  • [01:29.48]and he was smiling even then.
  • [01:32.09]So those of you who know him
  • [01:33.17]know he has such a gorgeous smile.
  • [01:35.48]I know you all have memories
  • [01:36.84]of graduates flooding through
  • [01:38.86]your minds today as we celebrate
  • [01:40.80]this milestone graduation,
  • [01:43.31]Class of 2009.
  • [01:44.80]One of my fondest
  • [01:46.12]memories of William,
  • [01:47.57]one time
  • [01:48.80]when he was a little boy,
  • [01:50.04]he was at my house,
  • [01:51.01]and I used to collect these
  • [01:53.57]antique museum quality Shaker boxes,
  • [01:59.13]and I walked into the room
  • [02:00.40]and William has my one of
  • [02:02.33]a kind Shaker boxes
  • [02:04.56]and he's stacking them up like
  • [02:06.08]Bric A Blocs and knocking them down
  • [02:09.66]and going, "Vroom."
  • [02:12.55]And I yelled, just
  • [02:14.14]I just started
  • [02:15.07]I said, "No, William, stop!"
  • [02:19.35]I think I stunned the boy,
  • [02:20.95]because he wasn't used to
  • [02:22.43]anybody yelling at him,
  • [02:23.81]and he stopped,
  • [02:24.82]he put the boxes back on the shelf
  • [02:26.77]and he found where he found them
  • [02:29.27]and he did not say a word to me.
  • [02:31.03]He didn't even cry.
  • [02:33.06]And a little later on,
  • [02:33.87]he goes up to his mom
  • [02:35.16]and he says,
  • [02:36.55]Mom, Auntie O is mean.
  • [02:40.87]Can we go home
  • [02:43.56]Well, William,
  • [02:44.39]Auntie O has some news for you.
  • [02:46.77]You're getting those scratchedup boxes
  • [02:48.46]for your graduation gift.
  • [02:52.46]You can knock them down
  • [02:53.14]all you want.
  • [02:53.91]But seriously,
  • [02:56.61]I don't know a better young man
  • [02:59.41]in the world than William Bumpus,
  • [03:02.04]and thank you, Duke,
  • [03:03.36]for making him
  • [03:04.16]an even greater young man.
  • [03:07.50]And I have to say
  • [03:08.60]that he is so kind
  • [03:09.57]and so generous of spirit.
  • [03:11.78]William, you're the son I wish I'd had,
  • [03:14.45]and so I'm thrilled to be here for you.
  • [03:15.98]Love you, Willzer.
  • [03:17.70]I've been doing my show now
  • [03:18.84]for almost 25 years.
  • [03:20.55]Feels like 125,
  • [03:22.18]but almost 25 years.
  • [03:23.43]And my greatest lessons
  • [03:26.09]have come from my work;
  • [03:28.28]talking to murderers,
  • [03:31.59]doing makeovers,
  • [03:33.87]learning about flesh-eating diseases,
  • [03:35.90]have all been great growing tools for me,
  • [03:39.40]because I look at life every day
  • [03:41.05]from the experience
  • [03:42.09]of what can I grow from this.
  • [03:46.85]Actually, the show is
  • [03:48.26]why I never needed therapy.
  • [03:50.80]Well, I might have needed therapy,
  • [03:52.40]but I never went to therapy,
  • [03:54.31]because I have learned so many lessons
  • [03:57.64]from our show
  • [03:59.45]and the people I've met.
  • [04:00.88]And the miracle for me
  • [04:02.26]is that almost 25 years later,
  • [04:04.75]I get to go to work every day
  • [04:06.62]and I am still learning.
  • [04:08.20]I just finished taping a show this week
  • [04:11.11]with so many powerful lessons
  • [04:13.79]that I wanted to weep,
  • [04:14.92]but I want to share some of
  • [04:16.20]those lessons with you today.
  • [04:17.69]As a matter of fact,
  • [04:18.51]there were so many lessons
  • [04:19.43]in the show that I taped
  • [04:20.55]just last week,
  • [04:21.24]that's going to air next week,
  • [04:22.70]you'll see it,
  • [04:23.48]I did weep.
  • [04:24.58]It was about some tough guys
  • [04:27.19]in prison for murder,
  • [04:28.89]for manslaughter,
  • [04:30.59]armed robbery,
  • [04:31.83]guys full of anger and violence.
  • [04:34.89]And they're involved in this program
  • [04:39.99]where dogs, little puppies,
  • [04:42.23]are taken from shelters
  • [04:45.02]and the eight-week-old puppies
  • [04:46.53]are given to the prisoners,
  • [04:48.89]eight-week-old puppies
  • [04:49.84]that would have otherwise been euthanized.
  • [04:52.44]The puppies live right
  • [04:53.73]in the prison cells
  • [04:56.78]with the prisoners 24 hours a day.
  • [04:59.54]And I forgot to ask them
  • [05:00.81]how they housebreak them,
  • [05:03.51]because it's not like you can say,
  • [05:04.90]I need to take the dog out.
  • [05:07.07]But the prisoners train these puppies
  • [05:10.88]to then be service dogs
  • [05:12.49]to help our soldiers in Iraq
  • [05:14.38]who come back
  • [05:15.22]with traumatic brain injuries
  • [05:16.69]and post-traumatic stress,
  • [05:18.80]and then send them
  • [05:20.56]to the veterans from Iraq.
  • [05:23.79]Some of these inmates
  • [05:25.68]had never known love or responsibility.
  • [05:30.25]They'd never taken care of anybody,
  • [05:32.94]nor knew what it felt like
  • [05:33.78]to have somebody love you back
  • [05:36.03]when you take care of them.
  • [05:37.59]But one of the things
  • [05:38.24]they teach the dogs
  • [05:39.92]is how to kiss the soldier's face.
  • [05:42.88]A lot of the soldiers come back
  • [05:44.04]with post-traumatic stress
  • [05:45.83]and have terrible experiences,
  • [05:48.32]and if the soldier is starting to go
  • [05:50.44]to a bad place in his mind,
  • [05:53.36]the dogs lick and kiss the soldier's face
  • [05:56.66]to bring him back to reality.
  • [05:59.26]So this means that the prisoners themselves
  • [06:01.34]also had to get the kisses
  • [06:02.62]from the puppies they were training.
  • [06:05.76]It's clear the kisses
  • [06:06.75]were also bringing the prisoners
  • [06:08.18]back from a hard, cold place,
  • [06:11.25]and to see these CRIminals,
  • [06:13.56]who had never, many of them,
  • [06:15.82]experienced love themselves,
  • [06:18.45]cry on camera,
  • [06:20.53]in front of each other,
  • [06:21.45]cry in redemption,
  • [06:22.88]their voices quivering as they talk about
  • [06:25.59]the chance to do something good,
  • [06:28.37]to do something kind and unselfish,
  • [06:30.60]by helping the wounded soldiers
  • [06:32.57]in Iraq and teaching the dogs,
  • [06:35.26]was so moving.
  • [06:36.71]And when the severely injured soldier
  • [06:39.09]what we did was we went
  • [06:40.47]and found one of the soldiers
  • [06:41.67]who had received a dog
  • [06:43.01]and brought him back
  • [06:44.19]to the prison so that
  • [06:45.34]he could meet the prisoner who
  • [06:46.88]who trained the dog.
  • [06:49.28]And when they met,
  • [06:50.58]I tell you,
  • [06:52.47]the audience and I were
  • [06:53.18]a puddle of tears.
  • [06:55.59]And what I learned from that
  • [06:56.63]I want to share with you, graduates.
  • [06:58.73]If you can find a way
  • [07:00.97]to give back just
  • [07:02.14]as these felons
  • [07:03.94]are giving from behind bars,
  • [07:06.46]you will be a huge success,
  • [07:09.47]because for sure one of the things
  • [07:11.32]I've learned is that
  • [07:12.79]the best way to enhance your own life
  • [07:16.06]is to contribute to somebody else's.
  • [07:19.09]Now, last year we did a story
  • [07:20.51]on a woman named Monica George,
  • [07:22.95]and people often ask,
  • [07:24.21]you know, "Who's your favorite guest,
  • [07:25.42]who's your favorite guest,"
  • [07:25.94]and they always expect me
  • [07:27.34]to name some movie star.
  • [07:30.39]Well, if it's a movie star,
  • [07:31.37]it would be Hugh Jackman.
  • [07:36.33]He's one of my favorite guests,
  • [07:39.83]and you can imagine why.
  • [07:43.71]But my favorite guests are,
  • [07:47.15]for the most part,
  • [07:48.26]not celebrities and not people
  • [07:50.42]who've done famous or infamous things.
  • [07:53.96]My most favorite guests
  • [07:55.92]are ordinary people
  • [07:57.92]who've accomplished extraordinary triumphs
  • [08:01.00]in their life,
  • [08:01.76]and Monica George is
  • [08:02.71]one of those people
  • [08:03.34]I will never forget.
  • [08:04.82]She and her husband,
  • [08:05.69]Tony, were overjoyed at the C-section birth
  • [08:09.27]of a healthy baby girl
  • [08:10.87]that they named Sophie
  • [08:12.44]and Sophie was their second daughter.
  • [08:14.36]This was just last year.
  • [08:15.38]But within hours,
  • [08:16.30]and while she was still in the hospital,
  • [08:18.35]Monica developed a fever
  • [08:21.49]and pain caused by a fast-moving,
  • [08:24.11]flesh-eating bacteria.
  • [08:26.61]She was dying,
  • [08:28.00]so they took some organs
  • [08:29.72]to save her,
  • [08:31.34]but the bacteria had spread,
  • [08:33.28]so the doctors came in
  • [08:34.72]and said to her,
  • [08:35.73]We think, as a matter of fact,
  • [08:38.93]we know we're going to
  • [08:39.82]have to amputate.
  • [08:41.37]We're going to
  • [08:42.37]have to take both your arms
  • [08:43.29]and both your legs.
  • [08:45.57]And this woman said,
  • [08:47.66]Get on with it.
  • [08:49.41]I want you to do it
  • [08:50.32]and do it as fast as you can,
  • [08:51.93]because I have to get home
  • [08:53.36]to take care of my girls.
  • [08:55.39]So imagine going into the hospital
  • [08:57.28]to have a baby,
  • [08:59.21]you have the healthy baby
  • [09:00.41]and you expect to be coming home
  • [09:02.60]with this tiny little pink bundle of joy,
  • [09:05.39]with pink little arms and legs,
  • [09:06.82]and instead you go home
  • [09:08.68]without your arms and legs.
  • [09:11.84]The arms that were going to hold
  • [09:13.30]this child and legs that
  • [09:14.61]were going to walk with her in the park.
  • [09:16.98]Monica had 37 operations
  • [09:19.93]in two months,
  • [09:22.01]but she's now home with her girls,
  • [09:24.08]home without a trace of self-pity,
  • [09:26.48]home with a smile on her face
  • [09:27.99]and a peace in her heart.
  • [09:29.78]And when I talked to her,
  • [09:30.63]she said, sure,
  • [09:32.86]sometimes it hurts
  • [09:33.73]that she's not able to
  • [09:34.99]paint Sophie's nails and toenails
  • [09:37.69]and do the things
  • [09:38.56]that mothers and daughters do,
  • [09:40.91]but she also said,
  • [09:42.05]What good are you to your children
  • [09:44.19]if you're miserable?
  • [09:46.67]There's so many lessons in this,
  • [09:48.05]because at some point,
  • [09:50.01]something in life
  • [09:52.02]is going to eat you inside.
  • [09:55.47]It could be anger;
  • [09:56.29]it could be guilt;
  • [09:57.23]it could be past hurts
  • [09:59.64]or some other strain of soul eating bacteria.
  • [10:04.07]But graduates,
  • [10:05.02]I want you to know
  • [10:06.84]that if you can summon the courage
  • [10:08.47]of Monica George in the face
  • [10:10.03]of your own life's hardships,
  • [10:12.14]and you will have them,
  • [10:13.28]and if you can remember
  • [10:14.60]what good are you to anyone
  • [10:17.80]if you're miserable,
  • [10:19.73]I know for sure you'll
  • [10:20.99]be a huge success,
  • [10:23.05]because you are responsible
  • [10:25.75]for your happiness
  • [10:27.29]and you are responsible
  • [10:29.03]for the energy
  • [10:30.12]you bring to everything.
  • [10:32.71]One of my other favorite guests
  • [10:33.94]was a woman named Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor,
  • [10:36.35]who's a brain scientist,
  • [10:38.15]who had a stroke
  • [10:39.38]in the left hemisphere
  • [10:40.51]of her brain.
  • [10:41.43]She wrote a book
  • [10:41.91]called My Stroke of Insight.
  • [10:44.28]And so only the right hemisphere
  • [10:45.85]was working,
  • [10:47.14]and when she was in the hospital
  • [10:48.37]as a patient,
  • [10:50.48]she said she could sense
  • [10:53.19]through her right brain
  • [10:55.96]when a nurse would come into the room
  • [10:58.23]and meant her well,
  • [10:59.69]or when the nurse
  • [11:00.39]was thinking about
  • [11:01.50]what time she was going
  • [11:02.45]to be off that day.
  • [11:04.59]She could sense the energy
  • [11:06.78]that was brought into the room.
  • [11:08.51]And after a while,
  • [11:09.54]she put up a sign in the room
  • [11:10.97]that said to everyone
  • [11:12.98]who came in the room,
  • [11:14.51]you are responsible for the energy
  • [11:17.35]that you bring.
  • [11:19.07]I love that moment,
  • [11:20.08]because we are responsible
  • [11:21.67]for the energy
  • [11:22.76]that we bring to everything
  • [11:25.01]we do in life.
  • [11:28.12]One thing that gets a huge response
  • [11:29.54]on the show is makeover.
  • [11:30.80]You know, we did a makeover
  • [11:31.89]on Coretta Scott King,
  • [11:33.24]the late Coretta Scott King,
  • [11:36.90]wife of Dr. Martin Luther King,
  • [11:38.12]and this was like going
  • [11:39.48]to Mount Rushmore
  • [11:40.26]and giving George Washington
  • [11:41.16]a new do,
  • [11:43.09]because she hadn't changed
  • [11:43.79]her do since 1954.
  • [11:46.35]But we've done a lot of makeovers.
  • [11:48.69]One woman hadn't changed
  • [11:50.94]her hair in 37 years.
  • [11:52.48]She had this big old hair
  • [11:53.40]thing going on.
  • [11:54.02]Another young woman
  • [11:55.03]worked in a chicken house,
  • [11:56.21]and after we got all the feathers off,
  • [11:57.44]she was stunning.
  • [11:59.64]Another woman had worn her hair
  • [12:00.63]in a bun for 25 years
  • [12:01.84]and put on makeup
  • [12:02.81]to go to bed at night,
  • [12:03.31]because she said
  • [12:04.43]if she died in her sleep,
  • [12:05.03]she wanted to be ready.
  • [12:10.10]People love makeovers,
  • [12:11.33]because the physical results
  • [12:12.56]are always so astonishing.
  • [12:14.71]But I like doing them
  • [12:16.28]because of the possibility of transforming
  • [12:19.93]more than the way people look.
  • [12:21.91]You want to change the way
  • [12:23.48]people feel about themselves.
  • [12:25.44]One man,
  • [12:26.20]a guy we'd just seen
  • [12:26.98]walking down the street,
  • [12:27.94]with a beard that
  • [12:28.60]was almost to the ground,
  • [12:30.14]it looked like he was
  • [12:31.40]hiding behind all of that beard.
  • [12:33.15]And after we got rid of all
  • [12:34.75]that hair and he could actually
  • [12:36.42]see himself, he said,
  • [12:37.71]"I feel alive again."
  • [12:39.39]The makeover allowed
  • [12:40.20]him to see himself in a
  • [12:41.51]way that he'd forgotten was there.
  • [12:43.73]You know, we all need makeovers
  • [12:45.11]from time to time in our lives,
  • [12:47.39]and graduates, I know this,
  • [12:49.31]that if you can see the possibility
  • [12:51.24]of changing your life,
  • [12:52.75]of seeing what you can become
  • [12:54.77]and not just what you are,
  • [12:56.66]you will be a huge success.
  • [12:59.88]One of my life heroes is Nelson Mandela,
  • [13:02.19]and I had the great honor
  • [13:04.11]of spending some time
  • [13:05.44]with Nelson Mandela,
  • [13:06.87]10 days and 29 meals at his house,
  • [13:09.50]and I was so worried about what
  • [13:10.73]I was going to talk about or
  • [13:12.61]what we would say
  • [13:13.72]at the dinner table.
  • [13:14.76]And Stedman said to me,
  • [13:16.19]"Why don't you try listening?"
  • [13:20.83]Thank you, Stedman.
  • [13:22.79]That worked.
  • [13:24.81]So I had the benefit of sitting
  • [13:26.46]at his table for 29 meals
  • [13:28.66]and listened a lot, listened
  • [13:30.28]to the stories of how
  • [13:31.57]he spent 27 years in
  • [13:32.96]a South African prison,
  • [13:35.09]and talked to him about
  • [13:36.57]how he was able to
  • [13:38.29]come out of that with
  • [13:39.57]a sense of forgiveness,
  • [13:41.05]to bind the wounds
  • [13:42.27]of South Africa
  • [13:43.47]and saving it from a mean
  • [13:45.54]and violent civil war.
  • [13:48.62]So I asked him to come
  • [13:50.58]on our show,
  • [13:52.65]and I was
  • [13:53.35]although I'd sat at his table
  • [13:55.29]and was very comfortable
  • [13:56.61]in his presence,
  • [13:58.06]I was really nervous
  • [13:59.60]having him come on the show,
  • [14:00.81]and I rarely, rarely, rarely
  • [14:02.46]get nervous.
  • [14:03.94]And for me, his
  • [14:06.23]warmth just filled our studio
  • [14:07.87]with a glow, and one of the
  • [14:09.59]things I will always remember
  • [14:11.13]him saying is how terrible
  • [14:12.95]it was to spend the best years
  • [14:14.88]of his life in that prison,
  • [14:16.55]but he said if he'd not been
  • [14:18.19]in prison, he would have
  • [14:19.11]not been able to achieve
  • [14:20.74]the most difficult task in his life,
  • [14:23.10]and that was to begin the change
  • [14:25.64]of himself.
  • [14:28.84]But this is so
  • [14:30.38]this tells the story of
  • [14:31.66]who he really is.
  • [14:32.28]He arrives at the studio
  • [14:34.66]and everybody's so excited
  • [14:35.94]and nervous and it's Nelson Mandela,
  • [14:37.41]and Nelson Mandela
  • [14:39.48]walks into the green room
  • [14:40.48]and says to the producer,
  • [14:42.36]"And what is the show about?"
  • [14:49.15]"Uh, you. The show's about you, sir."
  • [14:56.82]Nelson Mandela was so humble
  • [14:59.47]that being on the show for
  • [15:00.56]a whole hour was not something
  • [15:01.71]he expected. "
  • [15:03.20]How can such a great man be so humble,"
  • [15:05.63] I thought.
  • [15:06.59]Graduates, if you can proceed
  • [15:09.12]through life with just a portion
  • [15:10.99]of Nelson Mandela's humility,
  • [15:13.67]you will be a huge success.
  • [15:17.90]When I was eight years old,
  • [15:20.01]I was at church one day
  • [15:23.25]and a stranger came to me
  • [15:26.69]and a man named John J. Hooker
  • [15:29.97]was running for governor at the time,
  • [15:31.69] and he had come to our church to
  • [15:33.64] campaign. And afterwards,
  • [15:35.05]outside as we were leaving
  • [15:37.45]the church, his wife, who was
  • [15:39.30]then a stranger, her name
  • [15:40.45]was Tish Hooker, a beautiful
  • [15:42.35]woman with blonde hair,
  • [15:44.36]classic cheekbones, flawless
  • [15:45.85]skin, saw me standing there.
  • [15:48.77]And you have to understand
  • [15:51.12]at the time I was a little black
  • [15:56.63]girl, but we didn't call ourselves
  • [15:58.00]black then. Actually, back then
  • [15:59.87]we were colored and Negro,
  • [16:02.07]but whatever. I was a little girl
  • [16:04.13]who didn't think much of herself,
  • [16:08.00]but Tish Hooker walked right up
  • [16:10.19]to me, as if she knew I needed
  • [16:14.02]to hear what she had to say.
  • [16:17.44]And she said it only as a
  • [16:19.01]Southern woman can. She said,
  • [16:22.25]"You know, you're just as pretty
  • [16:23.83]as a speckled pup." Now,
  • [16:29.11]I didn't know what a speckled
  • [16:30.97]pup was, but she then said,
  • [16:34.53]"And you have the most beautiful
  • [16:37.52]bee-stung lips."
  • [16:40.63]Well, I knew I had big lips.
  • [16:43.37]I didn't know what bee-stung lips
  • [16:44.74]were. But she said it with such
  • [16:46.91]warmth and such kindness that
  • [16:49.65]I remember going home from
  • [16:51.11]church and staring at myself in
  • [16:54.40]the mirror, because Tish Hooker
  • [16:56.37]had said that I was pretty,
  • [16:59.45]and she was the first person
  • [17:00.54]that ever looked at me
  • [17:03.79]and had the courage
  • [17:06.31]to speak the words, "You're pretty."
  • [17:09.55] I'd never felt pretty.
  • [17:11.60]I knew I was smart,
  • [17:13.35]but this stranger, this woman
  • [17:14.30]who just came out of nowhere
  • [17:17.93]it seemed, was the first person
  • [17:19.78]to ever say it to me. And it made
  • [17:21.91]me see myself differently from
  • [17:24.52]that day forward, Tish Hooker saying,
  • [17:27.49]"You have such beautiful bee-stung lips,"
  • [17:33.34]and I've remembered that my
  • [17:35.67]whole life. You never know
  • [17:37.54]what kindness you offer today
  • [17:41.23]to someone, how that might live
  • [17:44.82]with them forever. So, graduates,
  • [17:48.20] if you can be generous enough
  • [17:49.77]to say kind, affirming words to
  • [17:52.38]those who may long to hear them,
  • [17:55.83]you will be a huge success.
  • [17:58.93]And finally, let me just tell you
  • [18:00.79]a story about my success.
  • [18:02.30]I had a charity sale, because
  • [18:04.04]I have clothes in every size,
  • [18:06.39]8, 10, 12, 14, elastic.
  • [18:14.30]Sometimes it gets crowded
  • [18:16.38]in my closet.
  • [18:19.92]So I had a charity sale awhile back
  • [18:22.93]to get rid of all that stuff,
  • [18:24.30]and a woman named Joanie Jacks
  • [18:26.16]didn't have much money,
  • [18:28.09]because she didn't have a job
  • [18:29.09]at the time, and the least expensive thing
  • [18:32.29]she could find was a pair
  • [18:33.85]of black shoes.
  • [18:35.96]Now, she wore a size seven
  • [18:37.53]and I'm a 10? on a good day,
  • [18:42.61]11 with humidity.
  • [18:46.19]So she bought a pair of
  • [18:47.50]my shoes and kept them in her bedroom,
  • [18:49.82]and she said that when she got depressed,
  • [18:52.71]when things weren't going well,
  • [18:55.82]she would take out the shoes
  • [18:58.45]and she would stand in my shoes.
  • [19:02.44]And she said she wanted
  • [19:03.19]to stand in the shoes until
  • [19:04.56]she'd be able to stand on her own,
  • [19:07.55]and she used the shoes as a sense
  • [19:09.63]of inspiration to herself.
  • [19:12.68]At age 50, she went back to
  • [19:14.13]college and got herself a degree,
  • [19:18.18]and today she's standing
  • [19:19.74]in her own shoes.
  • [19:22.62]That is what makes me feel successful.
  • [19:30.16]Of all the wonderful things
  • [19:32.12]that have happened,
  • [19:33.09]including getting a doctorate,
  • [19:35.14]an honorary doctorate from Duke,
  • [19:37.39]what reallymakes me feel successful
  • [19:39.29]is being able to use my life
  • [19:41.12]in service to someone else's.
  • [19:44.49]And I will have to say,
  • [19:45.42]it is a wonderful thing to
  • [19:47.29]have a beautiful home, or homes,
  • [19:52.76]a wonderful thing to have
  • [19:53.48]a beautiful home which just
  • [19:55.22]escaped the fire in Santa Barbara.
  • [19:58.02]And it is really fantastic
  • [19:59.73]to have your own jet,
  • [20:00.97]and anybody who says it isn't
  • [20:02.28]is lying to you.
  • [20:06.07]That jet thing is really good.
  • [20:10.29]But you really haven't completed
  • [20:13.60]the circle of success unless
  • [20:16.15]you can help somebody
  • [20:17.48]else move forward.
  • [20:19.09]That's the truth.
  • [20:20.41]Move to higher ground.
  • [20:21.60]That's the real goal.
  • [20:23.77]How do you get someone
  • [20:24.89]else to move to higher ground.
  • [20:28.38]So I spend my life doing that,
  • [20:29.31]thinking about how can I help
  • [20:32.17]somebody else move to higher ground.
  • [20:34.29]How can I help somebody else
  • [20:35.50]get to a stronger and better place,
  • [20:38.08]because that is success.
  • [20:39.98]That's it. That's why we're all alive,
  • [20:41.79]to use ourselves, our lives,
  • [20:44.91]for something bigger than ourselves.
  • [20:48.53]So, graduates, in closing,
  • [20:51.41]each of us has to stand in our own shoes,
  • [20:55.47]and the real question is how
  • [20:58.16]will you stand in your own?
  • [21:00.84]Will you stand in them with humility
  • [21:03.17]and compassion
  • [21:04.77]and integrity and courage?
  • [21:07.15]Well, I'm here to tell you,
  • [21:08.60]every day and every experience
  • [21:11.18]of your life will give you a chance
  • [21:12.91]to make that choice.
  • [21:14.67]It still happens to me, every day,
  • [21:16.09]all the time. Most recently,
  • [21:19.21]I was faced with a big decision
  • [21:22.94]as to whether or not
  • [21:24.32]we had done this wonderful show,
  • [21:27.02]informative show,
  • [21:29.38]on Columbine,
  • [21:32.13]with an author of the book
  • [21:33.89]who had written this really
  • [21:35.66]fascinating, intriguing book
  • [21:37.65]on Columbine. And we finished taping
  • [21:39.78] the show, and I went upstairs
  • [21:42.55]and I said to the producers,
  • [21:46.01]who were all excited because
  • [21:47.53]he was doing his first interview
  • [21:48.90]with us, and they get really excited,
  • [21:50.70]"It's exclusive and it's wonderful,
  • [21:52.20]it's great." And I said, "Yes,
  • [21:54.06]but something about that bothered me.
  • [21:56.99]I'm not quite sure what it was,
  • [21:58.81]but something didn't feel right."
  • [22:01.06]I said, "But I have to
  • [22:02.40]I have to take a look at it,
  • [22:04.58]I have to take some time to
  • [22:06.19]look at it, because in the moment,
  • [22:08.45]I really can't tell. I just have
  • [22:09.40]a feeling that something's
  • [22:11.97]off with that show." So I said,
  • [22:14.76]"I want to take a chance to review the tape,"
  • [22:17.75]and as my life wouldhave it,
  • [22:19.24]I didn't get a chance to review the tape.
  • [22:21.05]This was on a Thursday.
  • [22:22.04]The show was going to air on a Monday.
  • [22:23.86]Saturday, I'm sitting in Santa Barbara alone,
  • [22:27.53]quiet for a moment, and it occurred
  • [22:30.21]to me what's wrong with that show.
  • [22:33.51]There's something wrong with the
  • [22:34.70]energy that I brought to that show.
  • [22:39.26]And I called the producer and I said,
  • [22:41.13]"I know what's wrong with the show.
  • [22:43.46]I think the show focuses too much
  • [22:45.92]attention on the killers and
  • [22:48.28]it presents darkness,
  • [22:51.18]the energy of darkness,
  • [22:53.10]in a way that I really don't want
  • [22:55.16]to be responsible for."
  • [22:57.77]And the producer said,
  • [22:58.95]"But the promos have gone out.
  • [23:01.81]It's already airing all over the country.
  • [23:06.79]We've told all the stations
  • [23:07.79]that it's airing and they have
  • [23:09.22]it in their lineup." And I said,
  • [23:11.08]"I am responsible for the energy
  • [23:16.83]that goes out over the air,
  • [23:18.55]so we're going to have to pull it,
  • [23:20.48]regardless of what we've told the stations,
  • [23:23.27]and they'll have to understand."
  • [23:25.20]So we pulled the show, because
  • [23:27.57]I felt that at the end of the day,
  • [23:32.05]if one person watching that show
  • [23:35.47]saw or heard something that
  • [23:40.38]made them feel inspired to go out
  • [23:41.88]and bring more darkness into the world,
  • [23:42.56]I didn't want that on me.
  • [23:44.94]So it still happens every single day, decisions
  • [23:49.13]decisions come my way that require me
  • [23:59.33] to decide who am I really,
  • [24:05.13]what am I really doing this for?
  • [24:07.74]Decisions that allow me to make
  • [24:10.73] a decision as to whether or not
  • [24:12.47]I will do the right thing or will
  • [24:14.15]I do the popular thing.
  • [24:17.26]So for every experience in life,
  • [24:20.43]you get a chance to know
  • [24:23.17]whether or not right or whether
  • [24:26.84]or not you'll follow the opinions
  • [24:28.52]of everyone else. For me, it's all about
  • [24:31.96]following your gut.
  • [24:33.67]I am who I am because I trust my
  • [24:35.48]gut more than anyone else's opinion,
  • [24:39.04]and that is my best advice to you.
  • [24:42.33]You know what is right,
  • [24:45.94]and when everyone around you
  • [24:48.12]is telling you what you should do,
  • [24:50.69]what you shouldn't do, and when you
  • [24:52.49]have to ask more than anybody
  • [24:55.17]other than yourself,
  • [24:56.16]you have to ask anyone
  • [24:57.22]other than yourself,
  • [24:58.34]it is your instinct,
  • [25:02.82]your higher self's way of saying,
  • [25:04.87]Get still until you do know the answer,
  • [25:08.79]because your gut will never lead you wrong.
  • [25:12.71]Trust your gut to help you stand proudly
  • [25:17.07] in your own shoes,
  • [25:18.56]as you help others stand in theirs,
  • [25:21.81]and I know you will be a huge success.
  • [25:26.16]You have my warmest best wishes
  • [25:28.11]and my most heartfelt congratulations.
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