生活大爆炸第七季:第4集:萊納德的奇葩媽(上)
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So what'd you think?
你做何感想?
It was good.
還不賴
That's it? "Good"?
就仨字?不賴?
I enjoyed it.
我挺喜歡的
When you told me I was going to be "losing my virginity," I didn't think you meant showing me Raiders of the Lost Ark for the first time.
你跟我說"要你破處"的時候，誰知道是要獻出觀看《奪寶奇兵》的第一次嘛
My apologies. I chose my words poorly.
抱歉，在下用詞不當
I should have said you were about to have your world rocked on my couch.
我應該對你說，你將在我的沙發(fā)上體驗一場天旋地轉(zhuǎn)
Anyway, thank you for watching it.
言而總之，謝謝你賞光
It's one of my all-time favorites.
這部是我的心頭肉
It was very entertaining... despite the glaring story problem.
倒挺適合打發(fā)時間...雖然有顯而易見的情節(jié)漏洞
Story problem?! You-- oh, Amy... What a dewy-eyed moon-calf you are.
情節(jié)漏洞?!你... 我的艾米啊，真是個天真的小蠢蛋
Raiders of the Lost Ark is the love child of Steven Spielberg and George Lucas, two of the most gifted filmmakers of our generation.
《奪寶奇兵》可是喬治·盧卡斯和史蒂文·斯皮爾伯格這個時代兩位殿堂級電影人的結晶
I've watched it 36 times, except for the snake scene and the face-melting scene, which I can only watch when it's still light out, but...
我欣賞過36遍，除了蛇群和臉融化的鏡頭，那些只有燈亮著我才敢看
I defy you to find a story problem.
因此你的觀點我堅決反對
Here's my jaw... drop it. All right.
我的下巴在此，我看你怎么讓它掉(喻非常吃驚)奉陪到底
Indiana Jones plays no role in the outcome of the story.
故事結尾印第安納瓊斯毫無作用
If he weren't in the film, it would turn out exactly the same.
換言之，整部電影，他的角色可有可無
Oh, I see your confusion. You don't understand.
原來你卡在這兒了
Indiana Jones was the one in the hat with the whip.
你沒明白印第安納瓊斯是這個戴帽揮鞭的少年
No, I do, and if he weren't in the movie, the Nazis would have still found the ark,
我知道，如果他不出現(xiàn)，納粹黨還是會找到寶物
taken it to the island, opened it up and all died... just like they did.
帶上島開封，然后死翹翹，毫無影響
Let me close that for ya.
幫你合起來哈
Hey! Hi! I thought you went to the comic book store on Wednesdays.
好哇！嗨!我以為你周三去過漫畫書店了呢
Yeah, but Sheldon and Amy were having date night and they don't need me there to make it awkward.
是呀，不過謝爾頓和艾米今晚約會我在那不免太尷尬
They have each other for that.
他倆最不缺的就是尷尬
So, how was school?
夜大進展如何?
Oh, good. Check it out.
不錯喲，你瞅瞅
The Disappointing Child by Beverly Hofstadter.
貝弗利·霍夫斯塔德的《辜負眾望的孩子》
You bought my mom's book?
你買了我娘的書?
Yeah! It's on the recommended reading list for my psychology class.
是啊!這本是心理學課的推薦書目喲
Come on. Not that book. It-It's got, like, every horrible story from my childhood in it.
別介，偏偏是這本，這本...薈萃了我童年所有不堪回首的事跡
Oh, cool. Are there pictures?
真的嘛，圖文并茂嗎?
Seriously, please find another book.
說真的，換別的讀吧
Oh, come on. Why? How bad could it be?
看開點，能有多不堪入目?
There-There's chapters about potty training, and bed-wetting and... masturbation.
富含關于便便訓練，尿床...還有自慰的章節(jié)
Basically, if something came out of me, she wrote about it!
說白了，但凡我有點什么，她就寫什么!
You know what? Do whatever you want, just don't talk to me about it.
算了，愛怎么地就怎么地，別在我面前提起就成
Not even the chapter on the breast-feeding crisis?
母乳喂養(yǎng)危機也不能聊
It was not a crisis.
那不是危機
Apparently, I favored the left one, she got a little lopsided.
我不就喜歡吮吸左邊的乳房，她非覺得失衡
Oh, my God, you still go left!
哦天啊，你現(xiàn)在還是喜歡左邊的!
Which celebrity would you say I look like the most? Halle Berry.
你們覺得我和哪位名人最像?哈莉·貝瑞(好萊塢女演員)
Why? Stuart and I are putting dating profiles online, and it's one of the questions.
從何談起?我和斯圖爾特在相親網(wǎng)站上填資料，這是問題之一
And thank you-I'd kill for that woman's bone structure.
謝謝提示，哈莉的骨型讓我垂涎
Why are you reading Pride and Prejudice?
沒事看什么《傲慢與偏見》?
I'll tell you why.
告訴你
Amy ruined Raiders of the Lost Ark for me, so now I'm trying to find something beloved to her and ruin that.
艾米毀了《奪寶奇兵》我要以牙還牙，找到她的心愛之物，摧毀之
Because her life wasn't enough?
因為她的人生還不夠慘嗎?
Wait... how can, how can anyone ruin Raiders? It's perfect.
不對啊... 誰能毀《奪寶奇兵》啊?它無可挑剔啊
Yeah, except for the fact that Indiana Jones is completely irrelevant to the story.
對，除了印第安納瓊斯對故事完全沒影響
With or without him, the Nazis find the ark, open it and die. Aw! Aw! Aw!
他在不在，納粹都會找到寶物，開封，最后慘死。嗷!嗷!嗷!
Hey, wait a minute. No, the Nazis were digging in the wrong place. The only reason they got the ark was because Indy found it first.
別急。納粹本來挖錯地方了，他們之所以得到寶物，是因為印第安納瓊斯先行找到寶物
Actually, they were only digging in the wrong place because Indy had the medallion.
可要不是因為印第安納瓊斯有勛章在手，納粹也不會找錯地方
Without him, they would have had the medallion and dug in the right place. Aw! Aw! Aw!
如果沒有他，他們就會有勛章，自然會找對地方。嗷!嗷!嗷!
Okay, I know you don't want to talk about it, but can I just ask you one question about your mom's book? No.
我呢，我理解你不想談這事，但我能不能就你媽的書問一個小問題呢?不行
I just want to know, why a five-year-old boy puts on his mom's makeup and wears balloon boobies.
我就是想知道，為什么一個五歲的小男孩用他母親的化妝品，還穿著氣球咪咪
They weren't boobies, they were muscles.
那不是咪咪，那是做肌肉的
And the makeup was green. I was pretending to be The Hulk.
并且那化妝品是綠色的，我只是想扮綠巨人而已
You were wearing her bra.
你還穿著你媽的胸罩
That was to keep my muscles from sagging! Can we please stop talking about this?!
那是防止我的肌肉下垂啊!我們能不能就此打住了?
Okay, okay. But you know, as a student of psychology who got a check-plus on her first homework assignment...
好吧，聽你的，但你知道，作為一個學習心理學的學生，在她的第一份家庭作業(yè)上得了一個A
I think, sometimes, it's good to open up about these things. Okay, fine.
我認為有時候，敞開心扉去談這些事很有好處。好吧
Do you want to know why I dressed like The Hulk?
你想知道我為什么要打扮成綠巨人么?
Because I was always mad at my mom and I wanted to smash my way out of that house.
因為我總是很生她的氣，并且我想摔門離家出走
Well, why were you so angry? Gee, I don't know. Maybe it's because I was always the subject of her little experiments.
那你為什么那么生氣呢? 老天，我不知道，可能是因為我總是她小小實驗的對象吧
Did you get to the chapter where she staged the Easter egg hunt with no eggs to see how long I'd keep looking?
你看到有一章，她弄了個尋找復活節(jié)彩蛋的活動，其實根本沒蛋，只是想看我能找多久么?
The answer, by the way: June.
答案順便說下，我找到了六月
Sweetie, I'm so sorry. I wish there was something I could do to make you feel better. I do, too, but there's not.
甜心，我真抱歉，我真希望我能做些什么讓你好過些。我也希望，可惜沒有辦法
Really? Are you sure about that?
真的?你確定?
Of course, who am I to argue with a check-plus student?
當然，我怎么能和得A的優(yōu)秀學生爭論呢?
Mmm... Just warning you... I'm gonna go right. Don't make a big deal out of it.
嗯...提醒你下，這次我要弄右邊，不要大驚小怪哦
Is makeup really necessary?
真有必要化妝嗎?
Well, when someone looks at your dating profile, the first thing they see is your picture.
當然，當有人瀏覽你的交友信息時，第一眼看的就是你的照片
I just want to make sure you look fun and full of life and not like a body, they just pulled out of the river.
我只是想確保你看起來詼諧有趣、閱歷豐富，而不是一具剛從河里拖出來的尸體
All right, here we go, and... smile.
好的，我們開始拍吧，笑一下
Okay, uh-uh, that one's in the bank.
好吧，這張先存著
How about this? Turn away, and then turn back into it.
要不然這樣吧?轉(zhuǎn)過身，然后轉(zhuǎn)回來
But when you do, imagine the camera is the girl you want to meet.
但當你轉(zhuǎn)過來時，想象這臺相機就是你想遇到的夢中情人
You got it.
好主意
Okay, uh, let's try it again.
好吧，讓我們再試一次
Uh, but this time, pretend the girl you want to meet doesn't want to hurt you.
但這次，假裝你想遇到的夢中情人，并沒有想傷害你
I don't think I can give you that.
我覺得我做不到那個
Come on. One more time.
拜托了，再來一次
Yeah, it's, it's a little blurry, but I think that works in your favor.
額，這張有點拍糊了，但我覺得最好還是用這張
Do you want a beer? Sure.
想喝啤酒嗎?當然
Hey, have you finished writing your profile yet? Almost.
嘿，你的交友信息寫完了嗎?快了
Oh, what did you put as the one-word description of yourself?
噢，你在"一個詞形容自己"那欄填了什么?
I put: unobjectionable.
我寫的是:不招人嫌
But now that I hear it out loud, it just seems like I'm being cocky.
但我現(xiàn)在這么一聽，似乎顯得有點自大
What did you put for your best feature? My parents' money.
那你"最大的優(yōu)點"填了什么？富二代
Uh, what did you put for your best feature? I put: not applicable.
嗯，那你"最大的優(yōu)點"寫了什么呢?我寫的是:暫無
Come on, dude, you're being too hard on yourself. You've got a lot of good stuff going on.
拜托，哥們，你對自己太妄自菲薄了，你身上是有很多優(yōu)點的
Really? Like what?
真的?比如說?
Well, okay, you're a, you're a talented artist, you own your own business.
好吧你看，你是個才華橫溢的藝術家，你有自己的事業(yè)
Neither of those things have ever helped me meet a woman.
這兩點從沒幫我遇見個妞
Okay, well, can we imply that you're well-endowed?
好吧，那我們能說你是個天生有神器的人么
I do have one oddly long testicle.
我有個蛋蛋確實詭異的長
Okay, now you're talking like a winner!
你看，你現(xiàn)在說話的口氣才像個把妹高手!
Whatcha doin'?
在干嘛呢?
Oh, it turns out Amy's beloved Pride and Prejudice is a flawless masterpiece.
事實證明艾米最愛的《傲慢與偏見》是一本毫無槽點的杰作
He's got too much pride, she's got too much prejudice-- it just works.
男主狂妄自大，女主對他成見頗深，就這么擦出火花了
So you're looking to ruin something for her in the funny pages?
所以你想在幽默漫畫中找點東西，然后毀了它么?
Amy has a fondness for the comic strip Marmaduke. Mm-hmm. And...?
艾米非常喜歡《大丹麥狗馬默杜克》這部漫畫。嗯，然后呢?
And I think I've got it. Consider: a family possesses a dog that is so large and poorly disciplined, he causes nothing but problems.
我想我有主意了：有一家人養(yǎng)了一只特別大的狗，這只狗非常不乖而且麻煩不斷
Why do they keep him?!
你說他們?yōu)槭裁催€養(yǎng)它呢?
Maybe they fell in love with him as a puppy and didn't know how big he was gonna be. Of course.
也許他們在它還是小狗的時候就特別愛它，而且也不知道它將來會變得多大啊。就是說啊
You know, why couldn't she just like Ziggy? Yeah?
為什么她就不能喜歡Ziggy呢?為什么?
That thing's riddled with plot holes. Sorry, buddy.
那玩意兒簡直漏洞百出。真為你難過兄弟
Ooh! I think she's a fan of Garfield as well.
哦!我想起來她也是加菲貓的粉絲來著
Oh, darn it, now so am I.
噢，該死，現(xiàn)在我也喜歡上了
I'll see you later. I gotta go watch a stupid football game with Penny.
等會見，我得和佩妮去看一場愚蠢的橄欖球賽了
Wait-- hang on. You've spent time with Amy.
等等，先別走，你和艾米相處過
Can you think of anything she's fond of that has a bunch of flaws she hasn't noticed?
你能想到任何一件她喜歡的，她卻沒發(fā)現(xiàn)有一堆缺點的東東嗎?
I gotta go.
我得閃人了
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