1. 他們不想作出承諾 They are not into commitments
人們約會的目的各不相同。有的人是喜歡和別人一起吃飯,有的人是想找新歡,有的人則是為了找一個(gè)終身伴侶。
When your motive doesn't match theirs, there is a possibility, you won't be getting a call or text back, after the day out together. Commitment in a relationship is a big step and certain people are not in that frame of mind to take the step. If building a relationship is the next step you intend to take and it isn’t theirs, then the probability of ghosting you after the date is high, regardless of how connected you might feel or not. No one likes to take up what they are not ready for.
若你們的動(dòng)機(jī)迥然,有可能約會了一天,對方卻不給你回電話或回短信。在一段關(guān)系中,承諾是重要一步,而某些人卻無心邁出這一步。如果你接下來打算建立關(guān)系,而對方卻沒這個(gè)意向,那么就算你覺得和對方很親近,對方依舊會甩了你。你想更進(jìn)一步,而對方可能并沒有做好準(zhǔn)備。
2. 她/他心里還有別人 There is someone else in the picture
并非每個(gè)與別人約會的人都是單身。
Not everyone that goes on a date is completely single. Matter of fact, there is no rule against hitched individuals going on a date with a single person. Sometimes, hitched individuals go on dates to relieve themselves of stress from their partner, or just to experience hanging out with someone new. If you happen to go on a date with someone in this category, getting ghosted is very possible. A married person or someone in a serious relationship will not totally commit to someone single. Except the thought of being a side-chick or side-guy is appealing to you.
并非每個(gè)去約會的人都是單身。其實(shí),沒人規(guī)定已婚人士不能與單身人士約會。有時(shí),已婚人士去約會是為了減輕來自伴侶的壓力,或只是為了體驗(yàn)新鮮感。如果你碰巧是和這類人約會,你很有可能會被甩。非單身人士不會給一個(gè)單身的人以承諾,除非你想當(dāng)?shù)谌摺?/p>
3. 他們已經(jīng)得手了 They got what they wanted
一旦約會對象從你們的約會中得到了想要的東西,他們可能會就此消失。
Dates can be beautiful and romantic, so much that an instant connection happens and sparks fly. This could lead to having sex, transferring money, or giving out a piece of vital information that helps the other person. For some people that have the motive of gaining something from the date asides from getting to know you, when they get what they want, there is likely to be no text or call back. You get ghosted.
約會是美麗而浪漫的,你們或許會一見鐘情,干柴烈火。你們可能會發(fā)生關(guān)系,可能會給對方花錢,也可能會向?qū)Ψ酵嘎吨匾挠欣畔ⅰτ谝恍┤藖碚f,除了了解你之外,他們只想從約會中得到他們想要的東西。當(dāng)他們得手時(shí),就不會給你回短信或者回電話了。你,被甩了。
4. 他們有點(diǎn)焦慮 They have anxiety issues
約會完玩消失,可能只是因?yàn)槟愕募s會對象有點(diǎn)兒焦慮。
Getting ghosted could be a result of fear. There are people who battle with anxiety birthed from fear. The fear of not being enough and lovable, which could be a result of past failed relationships. This type of people hold back from reaching out after a date, to avoid going through such again. Even when the date goes well, It seems too good to be true. Dr. Jones says "they may do things to self-sabotage, like ghosting".
約會完玩消失可能是因?yàn)樗麄兒ε?。有些人會因?yàn)楹ε露a(chǎn)生焦慮情緒。他們可能因?yàn)檫^去談過幾次失敗的戀愛,所以害怕自己不夠好,不夠可愛。這種人在約會后忍住不主動(dòng)聯(lián)系對方,以免再次失敗。如果約會進(jìn)行得很順利,他們會覺得美好得太不真實(shí)了。瓊斯博士說:“他們可能會自暴自棄,比如玩消失?!?/p>
5. 他們對你沒興趣 Not interested
無論約會進(jìn)展是否順利,如果約會對象不喜歡你,那么你就很可能約會完就被甩。
The preference of what people desire in a partner varies. In most cases, if their date doesn’t measure up to what they desire, they ghost. People have a mental picture of what they want their partner to look like. Although, love happens and some people end up with the total opposite of what they initially pictured. Several others stick to what they have pictured.
每個(gè)人心目中理想伴侶的樣子可能都不盡相同。通常來說,如果約會與他們的期望不符,他們約會完就會消失。然而,有時(shí)候雖然你和對方的理想型完全相反,你們?nèi)钥赡軙凵蠈Ψ?。但有的人則會堅(jiān)持尋找自己心中的那個(gè)人。