雙語(yǔ)全文 ● 魯迅——白光

The White Light

It was afternoon before Chen Shicheng came back from seeing the results of the county examinations. He had gone very early， and the first thing he looked for on the list was the name Chen. Quite a few Chens leapt to meet his eye， but none followed by the characters Shicheng， thereupon，starting again， he made a careful search through all twelve lists. Even after everyone else had left， the name Chen Shicheng had not appeared on the list but the man was still standing there， a solitary figure before the front wall of the examination school.

A cool wind was ruffling his short greying hair and the early winter sun shone warmly on him， yet he felt dizzy as if from a touch of the sun. His pale face grew even paler； his tired eyes， puffy and red， glittering strangely. In fact， he had long stopped seeing the results on the wall， for countless black circles were swimming past his eyes.

He had won his first degree in the county examination and taken his second in the provincial capital， success following success.... The local gentry were trying by every means to ally with him by marriage； people were treating him like a god， cursing themselves for their former contempt and blindness. The other families renting his tumble-down house had been driven away—no need for that， they would move of their own accord—and the whole place was completely renovated with flagpoles and a placard at the gate.... If he wanted to keep his hands clean he could be an official in the capital， otherwise some post in the provinces would prove more lucrative. Once more the future mapped out so carefully had crashed in ruins like a wet sugar-candy pagoda， leaving nothing but debris behind.

Not knowing what he did， he turned with a strange sensation of disintegration， and shambled disconsolately home.

The moment he reached his door， seven small boys raised their voices to drone their lesson together. He started as if a chime had been struck by his ear， aware of seven heads with seven small queues bobbing in front of him， bobbing all over the room， with black circles dancing between. As he sat down they handed in their homework， contempt for him manifesting on every face.

白光

陳士成看過(guò)縣考的榜，回到家里的時(shí)候，已經(jīng)是下午了。他去得本很早，一見(jiàn)榜，便先在這上面尋陳字。陳字也不少，似乎也都爭(zhēng)先恐后的跳進(jìn)他眼睛里來(lái)，然而接著的卻全不是士成這兩個(gè)字。他于是重新再在十二張榜的圓圖里細(xì)細(xì)地搜尋，看的人全已散盡了，而陳士成在榜上終于沒(méi)有見(jiàn)，單站在試院的照壁的面前。

涼風(fēng)雖然拂拂的吹動(dòng)他斑白的短發(fā)，初冬的太陽(yáng)卻還是很溫和的來(lái)曬他。但他似乎被太陽(yáng)曬得頭暈了，臉色越加變成灰白，從勞乏的紅腫的兩眼里，發(fā)出古怪的閃光。這時(shí)他其實(shí)早已不看到什么墻上的榜文了，只見(jiàn)有許多烏黑的圓圈，在眼前泛泛的游走。

雋了秀才，上省去鄉(xiāng)試，一徑聯(lián)捷上去，……紳士們既然千方百計(jì)的來(lái)攀親，人們又都像看見(jiàn)神明似的敬畏，深悔先前的輕薄，發(fā)昏，……趕走了租住在自己破宅門(mén)里的雜姓——那是不勞說(shuō)趕，自己就搬的，——屋宇全新了，門(mén)口是旗竿和扁額，……要清高可以做京官，否則不如謀外放?！饺瞻才磐．?dāng)?shù)那俺蹋@時(shí)候又像受潮的糖塔一般，剎時(shí)倒塌，只剩下一堆碎片了。他不自覺(jué)的旋轉(zhuǎn)了覺(jué)得渙散了的身軀，惘惘的走向歸家的路。

他剛到自己的房門(mén)口，七個(gè)學(xué)童便一齊放開(kāi)喉嚨，吱的念起書(shū)來(lái)。他大吃一驚，耳朵邊似乎敲了一聲磬，只見(jiàn)七個(gè)頭拖了小辮子在眼前幌，幌得滿(mǎn)房，黑圈子也夾著跳舞。他坐下了，他們送上晚課來(lái)，臉上都顯出小覷他的神色。

“You may go，” he said painfully after a brief hesitation.

They snatched up their satchels， stuffed them under their arms， and were off like a streak of smoke.

Chen Shicheng could still see a host of small heads dotted with black circles dancing in front of him， now higgledy-piggledy， now in strange formation； but by degrees they grew fewer， hazier.

“Failed again！”

With a violent start he leapt to his feet， for undoubtedly the sound came from just beside him. When he turned his head there was no one there， yet he seemed to hear another muffled chime and his lips formed the words：

“Failed again！”

Abruptly he raisd one hand and reckoned it up on his fingers： eleven，thirteen times， counting this year made sixteen， yet not a single examiner had been capable of appreciating good writing， all had been completely blind. It was so pathetic， in fact， that he had to snigger. In a fury he snatched his neatly copied examination essays and poems from their cloth wrapper and started out with them； but in the doorway he was dazzled by the bright light outside， where even the hens were making fun of him. Unable to still the wild pounding of his heart， he slunk back inside again.

He sat down once more， a strange glitter in his eyes. He could see many things， but hazily—his wrecked future， in ruins like a sugar-candy pagoda before him， was looming so large that it blocked all his ways out.

The neighbours’ kitchen fires were long since out， their bowls and chopsticks washed， but Chen Shicheng had not started cooking a meal. His tenants knew from years of experience that after he had seen the results of the county examinations their best course was to close their doors early and mind their own business. First all voices were hushed， then one by one lamps were blown out， till nothing was left but the moon slowly climbing the cold night sky.

“回去罷。”他遲疑了片時(shí)，這才悲慘的說(shuō)。

他們胡亂的包了書(shū)包，挾著，一溜煙跑走了。

陳士成還看見(jiàn)許多小頭夾著黑圓圈在眼前跳舞，有時(shí)雜亂，有時(shí)也排成異樣的陣圖，然而漸漸的減少，模胡了。

“這回又完了！”

他大吃一驚，直跳起來(lái)，分明就在耳朵邊的話(huà)，回過(guò)頭去卻并沒(méi)有什么人，仿佛又聽(tīng)得嗡的敲了一聲磬，自己的嘴也說(shuō)道：

“這回又完了！”

他忽而舉起一只手來(lái)，屈指計(jì)數(shù)著想，十一，十三回，連今年是十六回，竟沒(méi)有一個(gè)考官懂得文章，有眼無(wú)珠，也是可憐的事，便不由嘻嘻的失了笑。然而他憤然了，驀地從書(shū)包布底下抽出謄真的制藝和試帖來(lái)，拿著往外走，剛近房門(mén)，卻看見(jiàn)滿(mǎn)眼都明亮，連一群雞也正在笑他，便禁不住心頭突突的狂跳，只好縮回里面了。

他又就了坐，眼光格外的閃爍；他目睹著許多東西，然而很模胡，——是倒塌了的糖塔一般的前程躺在他面前，這前程又只是廣大起來(lái)，阻住了他的一切路。

別家的坎煙早消歇了，碗筷也洗過(guò)了，而陳士成還不去做飯。寓在這里的雜姓是知道老例的，凡遇到縣考的年頭，看見(jiàn)發(fā)榜后的這樣的眼光，不如及早關(guān)了門(mén)，不要多管事。最先就絕了人聲，接著是陸續(xù)的熄了燈火，獨(dú)有月亮，卻緩緩的出現(xiàn)在寒夜的空中。

The deep blue of the sky was like an expanse of sea， while a few drifting clouds looked as if someone had dabbled a piece of chalk in a dish for washing brushes. The moon discharged cold rays of light down upon Chen Shicheng. At first the orb seemed no more than a newly polished iron mirror but by some mysterious means this mirror projected light through him until he reflected the shadow of the iron moon.

He paced up and down the yard outside his room， his vision clear now，all around him still. But this stillness was abruptly and rudely shattered as in his ear he distinctly heard the urgent whisper：

“Left turn， right turn....”

He pricked up his ears and listened intently as the voice repeated more loudly：

“Right turn！”

Now he remembered. This yard was the place， before his family fortunes declined， where he used to come with his grandmother on summer evenings to enjoy the cool. A boy of ten， he would lie on a bamboo couch while his grandmother sat beside him and told him interesting stories. She had it from her own grandmother， she said， that the founder of the Chen family was a man of great wealth who had built this house and buried a vast store of silver here， which some fortunate descendant was bound to find，although so far no one had discovered it. A clue to the hiding place was in this riddle：

Left turn， right turn， forward， back！

Gold and silver by the sack！

Chen Shicheng often quietly cudgelled his brains to guess this riddle. Unfortunately he no sooner hit on a solution than he realized that it was wide of the mark. Once he was sure the treasure was under the room rented to the Tang family， but he lacked the courage to dig there and a little later it struck him as most unlikely. As for the vestiges of earlier excavations in his own room， these were signs of his depression over previous failures in the examination， and the sight of them later shamed and embarrassed him.

空中青碧到如一片海，略有些浮云，仿佛有誰(shuí)將粉筆洗在筆洗里似的搖曳。月亮對(duì)著陳士成注下寒冷的光波來(lái)，當(dāng)初也不過(guò)像是一面新磨的鐵鏡罷了，而這鏡卻詭秘的照透了陳士成的全身，就在他身上映出鐵的月亮的影。

他還在房外的院子里徘徊，眼里頗清凈了，四近也寂靜。但這寂靜忽又無(wú)端的紛擾起來(lái)，他耳邊又確鑿聽(tīng)到急促的低聲說(shuō)：

“左彎右彎……”

他聳然了，傾耳聽(tīng)時(shí)，那聲音卻又提高的復(fù)述道：

“右彎！”

他記得了。這院子，是他家還未如此雕零的時(shí)候，一到夏天的夜間，夜夜和他的祖母在此納涼的院子。那時(shí)他不過(guò)十歲有零的孩子，躺在竹榻上，祖母便坐在榻旁邊，講給他有趣的故事聽(tīng)。伊說(shuō)是曾經(jīng)聽(tīng)得伊的祖母說(shuō)，陳氏的祖宗是巨富的，這屋子便是祖基，祖宗埋著無(wú)數(shù)的銀子，有福氣的子孫一定會(huì)得到的罷，然而至今還沒(méi)有現(xiàn)。至于處所，那是藏在一個(gè)謎語(yǔ)的中間：

“左彎右彎，前走后走，量金量銀不論斗?！?

對(duì)于這謎語(yǔ)，陳士成便在平時(shí)，本也常常暗地里加以揣測(cè)的，可惜大抵剛以為可通，卻又立刻覺(jué)得不合了。有一回，他確有把握，知道這是在租給唐家的房底下的了，然而總沒(méi)有前去發(fā)掘的勇氣；過(guò)了幾時(shí)，可又覺(jué)得太不相像了。至于他自己房子里的幾個(gè)掘過(guò)的舊痕跡，那卻全是先前幾回下第以后的發(fā)了怔忡的舉動(dòng)，后來(lái)自己一看到，也還感到慚愧而且羞人。

But this iron light enfolding him today was gently persuasive. And when Chen Shicheng hesitated， the serious proofs it brought forward，backed up by some covert pressure， compelled him to cast his eyes towards his own room again.

A white light， like a round white fan， was flickering in his room.

“So it’s here after all！”

With these words he charged like a lion into the room， but once across the threshold he saw no sign of white light， nothing but a dark， shabby room， with some rickety desks half swallowed up in the shadows. He stood there irresolutely till by degrees his vision cleared and the white light reappeared beyond a doubt， broader this time， whiter than sulphurous flames and lighter than morning mist. It was underneath a desk by the east wall.

Chen Shicheng charged like a lion to the door， but when he put out his hand for the hoe behind it he bumped into a dark shadow. He gave an involuntary shiver and hastily lit the lamp， but there was nothing there except the hoe， he moved away the desk and hardly stopping for breath raised four square flagstones. Kneeling， he saw the usual fine yellow sand，and rolling up his sleeves he removed this sand to reveal black earth beneath. Very carefully and quietly he dug down， stroke by stroke. The night was so still， however， that the thudding of his sharp-bladed hoe against the earth was plainly audible.

The pit was over two feet deep yet still no crock had appeared and Chen Shicheng was beginning to lose heart when —clang！ —he wrenched his wrist as the hoe struck something hard. He dropped his tool and scrabbled in the soil， discovering a large square brick beneath. His heart was throbbing painfully as with infinite care he prised up this brick， disclosing beneath it the same black earth as before. Although he loosened a great deal of earth， it apparently went down and down without end. All of a sudden， however， he struck a small hard object， something round， probably a rusty coin. There were some fragments of broken china too.

Faint and soaked in sweat， Chen Shicheng burrowed desperately. His heart nearly turned over when he struck another strange object shaped somewhat like a horseshoe， but light and brittle in his hands. Having extracted it with infinite care， he picked it up cautiously and studied it intently by the lamp. Blotched and discoloured like a mouldering bone， it bore an incomplete row of teeth on the upper side. He realized that it must be a jawbone twitched disconcertingly in his hands and gaped as if with laughter. Finally he heard it mutter：

但今天鐵的光罩住了陳士成，又軟軟的來(lái)勸他了，他或者偶一遲疑，便給他正經(jīng)的證明，又加上陰森的催逼，使他不得不又向自己的房里轉(zhuǎn)過(guò)眼光去。

白光如一柄白團(tuán)扇，搖搖擺擺的閃起在他房里了。

“也終于在這里！”

他說(shuō)著，獅子似的趕快走進(jìn)那房里去，但跨進(jìn)里面的時(shí)候，便不見(jiàn)了白光的影蹤，只有莽蒼蒼的一間舊房，和幾個(gè)破書(shū)桌都沒(méi)在昏暗里。他爽然的站著，慢慢的再定睛，然而白光卻分明的又起來(lái)了，這回更廣大，比硫黃火更白凈，比朝霧更霏微，而且便在靠東墻的一張書(shū)桌下。

陳士成獅子似的奔到門(mén)后邊，伸手去摸鋤頭，撞著一條黑影。他不知怎的有些怕了，張惶的點(diǎn)了燈，看鋤頭無(wú)非倚著。他移開(kāi)桌子，用鋤頭一氣掘起四塊大方磚，蹲身一看，照例是黃澄澄的細(xì)沙，揎了袖爬開(kāi)細(xì)沙，便露出下面的黑土來(lái)。他極小心的，幽靜的，一鋤一鋤往下掘，然而深夜究竟太寂靜了，尖鐵觸土的聲音，總是鈍重的不肯瞞人的發(fā)響。

土坑深到二尺多了，并不見(jiàn)有甕口，陳士成正心焦，一聲脆響，頗震得手腕痛，鋤尖碰著什么堅(jiān)硬的東西了；他急忙拋下鋤頭，摸索著看時(shí)：一塊大方磚在下面。他的心抖得很利害，聚精會(huì)神的挖起那方磚來(lái)，下面也滿(mǎn)是先前一樣的黑土，爬松了許多土，下面似乎還無(wú)窮。但忽而又觸著堅(jiān)硬的小東西了，圓的，大約是一個(gè)銹銅錢(qián)；此外也還有幾片破碎的磁片。

“Failed again！”

An icy shudder went through him. He let it go. The jawbone had barely dropped lightly back into the pit before he bounded out into the yard. He stole a glance at his room. The dazzling lamp and supercilious jawbone made it strangely terrifying. Averting his eyes in fear， he lay down in the shadows of the eaves some distance away， where he felt slightly safer. But another sly whisper sounded through the stillness in his ear：

“Not here.... Go to the hills....”

Chen Shicheng had a faint recollection of hearing this remark in the street that day， and at once light dawned on him. He threw back his head to look up at the sky. The moon was hiding itself behind West Peak， so that the peak a dozen miles from the town seemed immediately before him， upright，black， and awesome as the tablet carried by ministers to court， while from it pulsed great flickering beams of white light.

And this white light in the distance seemed just before him.

“Yes， to the hills！”

This decision taken， he rushed wildly out. Doors hanged as he opened them， then all was still. The lamp， its wick heavily furred， lit up the empty room and the gaping pit. Presently it sputtered a few times and by degrees dwindled and died as the oil burned out.

“Open the gate！ ...”

In the dawn this cry， fearful and despairing yet fraught with infinite hope， throbbed and trembled like a floating thread before the West Gate of the town.

陳士成心里仿佛覺(jué)得空虛了，渾身流汗，急躁的只爬搔；這其間，心在空中一抖動(dòng)，又觸著一種古怪的小東西了，這似乎約略有些馬掌形的，但觸手很松脆。他又聚精會(huì)神的挖起那東西來(lái)，謹(jǐn)慎的撮著，就燈光下仔細(xì)的看時(shí)，那東西斑斑剝剝的像是爛骨頭，上面還帶著一排零落不全的牙齒。他已經(jīng)悟到這許是下巴骨了，而那下巴骨也便在他手里索索的動(dòng)彈起來(lái)，而且笑吟吟的顯出笑影，終于聽(tīng)得他開(kāi)口道：

“這回又完了！”

他栗然的發(fā)了大冷，同時(shí)也放了手，下巴骨輕飄飄的回到坑底里不多久，他也就逃到院子里了。他偷看房里面，燈光如此輝煌，下巴骨如此嘲笑，異乎尋常的怕人，便再不敢向那邊看。他躲在遠(yuǎn)處的檐下的陰影里，覺(jué)得較為平安了；但在這平安中，忽而耳朵邊又聽(tīng)得竊竊的低聲說(shuō)：

“這里沒(méi)有……到山里去…”

陳士成似乎記得白天在街上也曾聽(tīng)得有人說(shuō)這種話(huà)，他不待再聽(tīng)完，已經(jīng)恍然大悟了。他突然仰面向天，月亮已向西高峰這方面隱去，遠(yuǎn)想離城三十五里的西高峰正在眼前，朝笏一般黑魆魆的挺立著，周?chē)惴懦龊拼箝W爍的白光來(lái)。

而且這白光又遠(yuǎn)遠(yuǎn)的就在前面了。

“是的，到山里去！”

他決定的想，慘然的奔出去了。幾回的開(kāi)門(mén)聲之后，門(mén)里面便再不聞一些聲息。燈火結(jié)了大燈花照著空屋和坑洞，畢畢剝剝的炸了幾聲之后，便漸漸的縮小以至于無(wú)有，那是殘油已經(jīng)燒盡了。

“開(kāi)城門(mén)來(lái) ”

含著大希望的恐怖的悲聲，游絲似的在西關(guān)門(mén)前的黎明中，戰(zhàn)戰(zhàn)兢兢的叫喊。

At noon the next day someone noticed a drowned man floating in the Wanliu Lake five miles from the West Gate. He lost no time in spreading the news till word reached the local bailiff， who got some villagers to recover the corpse. It was the body of a man in his fifties， “of medium height， pale and beardless，” completely naked. It may have been Chen Shicheng. But since none of his neighbours could be troubled to go and look and no kinsmen went to identify and claim him， after the county authorities had held and inquest the bailiff buried him. The cause of death was beyond dispute and the theft of a dead man’s clothes a common occurrence，insufficient grounds for suspicion of foul play. In fact， the post-mortem established that he had fallen in while still alive， for he had undoubtedly struggled under the water—embedded under all his nails was mud from the bottom of the lake.

Jun-22

第二天的日中，有人在離西門(mén)十五里的萬(wàn)流湖里看見(jiàn)一個(gè)浮尸，當(dāng)即傳揚(yáng)開(kāi)去，終于傳到地保的耳朵里了，便叫鄉(xiāng)下人撈將上來(lái)。那是一個(gè)男尸，五十多歲，“身中面白無(wú)須”，渾身也沒(méi)有什么衣褲?；蛘哒f(shuō)這就是陳士成。但鄰居懶得去看，也并無(wú)尸親認(rèn)領(lǐng)，于是經(jīng)縣委員相驗(yàn)之后，便由地保抬埋了。至于死因，那當(dāng)然是沒(méi)有問(wèn)題的，剝?nèi)∷朗囊路緛?lái)是常有的事，夠不上疑心到謀害去；而且仵作也證明是生前的落水，因?yàn)樗_鑿曾在水底里掙命，所以十個(gè)指甲里都滿(mǎn)嵌著河底泥。

一九二二年六月。