A gently Caress1)
Michael and I hardly noticed when the waitress came and placed the plates on our table.We were seated in a small deli tucked away2) from the bustle3) of Third Street,in New York City.
Our exchange was lively,if not profound.We laughed about the movie that we had seen the night before and disagreed about the meaning behind the text we had just finished for our literature seminar.He told me about the moment when he had taken the drastic step into maturity by becoming Michael and refusing to respond to “Mickey.”Had he been twelve or fourteen?He couldn't remember,but he did recall that his mother had cried and said he was growing up too quickly.As we bit into our blueberry blintzes,I told him about the blueberries that my sister and I used to pick when we went to visit our cousins in the country.I recalled that I always finished mine before we got back to the house,and my aunt would warn me that I was going to get a very bad stomachache.Of course,I never did.
As our sweet conversation continued,my eyes glanced across the restaurant,stopping at the small corner booth where an elderly couple sat.Her floral print dress seemed as faded as the cushion on which she had rested her worn handbag.The top of his head was as shiny as the soft-boiled egg on which he very slowly nibbled.She also ate her oatmeal4) at a slow,almost tedious pace.
But what drew my thoughts to them was t heir undisturbed silence.It seemed to me that a melancholy5) emptiness permeated6) their little corner.As the exchange between Michael and me fluctuated7) from laughs to whispers,confessions to assessments,this couple's poignant8) stillness called to me.How sad,I thought,not to have any thing left to say.Wasn't there any page that they hadn't yet turned in each other's stories?What if that happened to us?
Michael and I paid our small tab and got up to leave the restaurant.As we walked by the corner where the old couple sat,I accidentally dropped my wallet.Bending over to pick it up,I noticed that under the table,each of their free hands was gently cradled in the other's.They had been holding hands all this time!
I stood up and felt humbled by the simple yet profound act of connection I had just been privileged to9) witness.This man's gentle caress of his wife's tired fingers filled not only what I had previously perceived as an emotionally empty corner,but also my heart.Theirs was not the uncomfortable silence whose threat one always feels just behind the punch line or at the end of an anecdote10 on the first date.No,theirs was a comfortable,relaxed ease,a gentle love that knew it did not always need words to express itself.They had probably shared this hour of the morning with each other for a long time,and maybe today wasn't that different from yesterday,but they were at peace with that,and with each other.
Maybe,I thought as Michael and I walk ed out,it wouldn't be so bad if someday that was us.Maybe,it would be kind of nice.
by Daphna Renan
溫 柔
當侍者走過來將盤子放在我們的桌上時,邁克爾和我?guī)缀醵紱]有注意到。我們坐在一家小熟食店里,它藏匿在紐約市繁忙的第三大街的一個地方。我們的交談也許談不上深刻,但是很熱烈。我們笑談頭天晚上看過的電影,又對剛剛在文學討論課上學完的課文中隱含的意義爭論了一番。他告訴我他步入成熟的那個關(guān)鍵時刻---即他成為邁克爾,而不再讓人叫他“米基”。那時他是12歲還是14歲?他記不得了,但他的確記得他母親叫喊著說他長得太快了。當我們開始吃藍莓薄餅卷時,我告訴他我妹妹和我以前去鄉(xiāng)下看表姐妹時去摘藍莓的情景。我記得我總是在回到家前就把我摘的那些全都吃完了,而我的姑姑總是警告說我會肚子疼的。當然我的肚子壓根兒沒疼過。當我們愉快的交談仍在進行時,我匆匆環(huán)視了一下餐館,最后將目光停在一個小小的靠墻角的餐位,那里坐著一對老夫婦。她那有印花圖案的裙子看上去像椅墊一樣褪了色,椅墊上放著她破舊的手提袋。他的頭頂像他正在慢慢吃著的溏心蛋一樣發(fā)亮。她正在喝麥片粥,節(jié)奏緩慢得近乎乏味。但是吸引我注意力的是他們那不受干擾的沉默。在我看來,一種憂郁的空虛彌漫于他們那小小的角落。邁克爾和我的交談,從歡笑到低語,從表白到評論起伏不斷,而這對老夫婦痛切的沉寂觸動了我。多么可悲呀,我想,再沒什么話可說了。難道彼此的故事中再沒有尚未翻開的一頁了嗎?如果這發(fā)生在我們身上會怎樣呢?邁克爾和我付完賬單后起身欲離開餐館。當我們經(jīng)過那對老夫婦就坐的角落時,我碰巧把錢包掉在了地上。彎腰將它拾起時,我注意到,在餐桌下,他們空著的手正溫柔地握著。他們的手一直在握著。我站起身,剛才有幸看到的簡單而深刻的相依之情讓我感到自己的卑微。這位長者對妻子疲憊的手指溫柔的撫摸所表現(xiàn)出來的柔情,不僅彌漫于我剛才認為是情感空白的角落,也充盈在我的心中。他們的沉默可不是那種初次約會一句妙語或一段趣聞之后令人不舒服的沉默。不,他們的沉默來得很舒服,很愜意,是一種無需語言來表達的溫柔的愛。也許他們共享這早上的時光已有很長時間,也許今天與昨天并無多大不同,但是他們淡然處之,相親相愛,一如既往。當邁克爾和我走出來時,我在想,也許,如果有一天我們倆變成這樣,那不見得是件壞事。相反,也許會是件好事。
NOTE 注釋:
caress [kE5res] n. 愛撫
tuck away 隱藏起來
bustle [5bQs(E)l] n. 喧鬧;熙攘
oatmeal [5EJtmi:l] n. (燕)麥片, (燕)麥粥
melancholy [5melEnkEli] adj. 憂郁的
permeate [5pE:mieit] vt. 彌漫, 滲透, 透過, 充滿
fluctuate [5flQktjueit] vi. 變動, 波動,起伏
poignant [5pCinEnt] adj. 令人痛苦的,深刻的,劇烈的
be privileged to 有幸
anecdote [5AnikdEut] n. 軼事, 奇聞