這篇例文是曼城前考官Simon的作品,總共分為4段:
第一段:在改寫題目之余,作者又加入了對該流程圖的概述
第二段:通過連接詞和表達(dá)的使用,改寫了圖標(biāo)中的第1、2、3步驟(廢紙的收集、分類和運(yùn)輸)。
第三段:歸納了第4、5步驟:廢紙的清潔和去墨。
第四段:涵蓋了最后一步驟,指出該流程圖最后產(chǎn)出的是可再利用的紙張。
word count: 158
The flow chart shows how waste paper is recycled. It is clear that there are six distinct stages in this process, from the initialcollection of waste paper to the eventual production of usable paper.
At the first stage in the paper recycling process, waste paper is collected either from paper banks, where members of the public leave their used paper, or directly from businesses. This paper is then sorted by hand and separated according to its grade, with any paper that is not suitable for recycling being removed. Next, the graded paper is transported to a paper mill.
Stages four and five of the process both involve cleaning. The paper is cleaned and pulped, and foreign objects such as staples are taken out.Following this, all remnants of ink and glue are removed from the paper at the de-inking stage.
Finally, the pulp can be processed in a paper-making machine, which makes the end product: usable paper.
想要得到高分,除了有詞匯的多樣性,還得使用足夠多的連接詞來表明每一個(gè)步驟。其次,可以發(fā)現(xiàn)對于沒有具體時(shí)間點(diǎn)的圖標(biāo),該篇文章還采用了一般現(xiàn)在時(shí)。最后,作為一幅工序制作圖,被動(dòng)語態(tài)自然是少不了的。各位同學(xué)學(xué)會了嗎?祝大家早日與雅思分手~