188.成為贊美之人
成為贊美之人。這可讓我們的好品味得到更多的贊揚(yáng),這說(shuō)明我們?cè)谒幰勋@得經(jīng)驗(yàn),知道何為優(yōu)秀,從而知道在所處的場(chǎng)合如何進(jìn)行贊美。贊美可以提供談資、模仿的范本,并激勵(lì)人們?nèi)プ鲋档梅Q道的努力。而且,這也是用優(yōu)雅的方式向我們面前的杰出人物表示敬意。有的人則與此相反,他們用譏笑作為自己說(shuō)話的伴奏,自認(rèn)為貶低不在場(chǎng)的人就能恭維在場(chǎng)之人。也許,他們可用此手法對(duì)付淺薄之人,因?yàn)檫@些人注意不到對(duì)每個(gè)人都說(shuō)別人的壞話是多么的狡詐。許多人都跟隨這一策略:他們崇尚今天的平庸事跡,勝過(guò)昨日的豐功偉績(jī)。審慎者一眼就能看穿這點(diǎn)小把戲,他們既不因?yàn)樵u(píng)論者言過(guò)其實(shí)而沮喪,也不因別人的諂媚而得意忘形。他們明白,那些人是在做同樣的事情,他們根據(jù)不同的說(shuō)話對(duì)象采取了不同的手段。
188.Be the bearer of praise
Be the bearer of praise. This increases our credit for good taste, since it shows that we have learnt elsewhere to know what is excellent, and hence how to prize it in the present company It gives material for conversation and for imitation, and encourages praiseworthy exertions. We do homage besides in a very delicate way to the excellences before us. Others do the opposite: they accompany their talk with a sneer, and fancy they flatter those present by belittling the absent. This may serve them with superficial people, who do not notice how cunning it is to speak ill of everyone to everyone else. Many pursue the plan of valuing more highly the mediocrities of the day than the most distinguished exploits of the past. Let the cautious penetrate through these subtleties, and let him not be dismayed by the exaggerations of the one or made overconfident by the flatteries of the other; knowing that both act in the same way by different methods, adapting their talk to the company they are in.