他其實沒那么喜歡你 第5期:格雷格的介紹(2)

Look, I am not a doctor, neither real nor imagined.

瞧，我并不是醫(yī)生，無論是真實的還是想象的。

But I am an expert that should be listened to because of one very important thing: I'm a guy—a guy that has had his fair share of relationships and is willing to come clean about his behavior in them.

但我是一個專家，你們應(yīng)該聽從我的建議，因為這件事情非常重要：我是一個男人——一個愿意分享自己戀愛關(guān)系，坦白自己行為的男人。

Because I'm a guy, I know how a guy thinks, feels, and acts, and it's my responsibility to tell you who we really are.

因為我是一個男人，我知道一個男人的想法，感覺和行為，我有責(zé)任告訴你我們的真實面目。

I'm tired of seeing great women in bullshit relationships.

我厭倦了看到優(yōu)秀的女性陷入糟糕的戀愛關(guān)系里。

When a guy is into you, he let's you know it.

當(dāng)一個男人喜歡你的時候，他會讓你知道的。

He calls, he shows up, he wants to meet your friends, he can't keep his eyes or hands off of you,and when it's time to have sex, he's more than overjoyed to oblige.

他會打電話給你，他會出現(xiàn)在你身邊，他希望可以認(rèn)識你的朋友，他無法把視線從你身上挪開，無法放開你的手，當(dāng)做愛的時候，他會萬分高興，而不僅僅是敷衍了事。

I don't care if he's starting his new job as the president of the United States the next morning at 0400 (that's 4 A.M. ladies! ).

我不管他是不是要第二天早上4點開始他美國總統(tǒng)的新工作。( 是早上4點，女士們!)

He's coming up!

他會出現(xiàn)的!

Men are not complicated, although we'd like you to think we are, as in "Things are really crazy right now. I've just got a ton of shit going on."

男人并不復(fù)雜，盡管我們想讓你認(rèn)為我們復(fù)雜，就像"現(xiàn)在真的一切都亂了。我有一堆的麻煩事兒要處理。"這樣。

We are driven by sex, although we'd like to pretend otherwise: "What? No, I was totally listening."

我們被性驅(qū)動著，盡管我們想假裝并非如此："什么?不，我完全在聽。"

And sadly (and most embarrassingly) , we would rather lose an arm out a city bus window than tell you simply, "You're not the one."

不幸的是(也最尷尬的是)，我們寧愿在城市公交車的窗戶外失去一只胳膊，也不愿簡單地告訴你，"你不是我的真命天女。"

We are quite sure you will kill us or yourself or both—or even worse, cry and yell at us.

我們很確信你會殺了我們或自己或都會，或者會更糟，對著我們哭喊大叫。

We are pathetic. But the fact remains, even though we may not be saying it we are absolutely showing you all the time.

我們很差勁。但事實是，盡管我們可能沒有說出口，但我們一直都在向你透露著這個信息。

If a dude isn't calling you when he says he will, or making sure that you know he's dating you, then you already have your answer.

如果一個家伙說他會打電話給你確沒有打，或者確保你知道你們正在約會，那么你已經(jīng)有了答案。

Stop making excuses for him, his actions are screaming the truth: He's just not that into you.

不要再為他找借口了，他的行為正在喊出真相：他只是沒那么喜歡你。

Move on, sister! Cut your losses and don't waste your time.

繼續(xù)前進(jìn)，姐們們!減少你的損失，別浪費(fèi)你的時間。

Why stay in some weird dating limbo when you can move on to what will surely be better territory?

當(dāng)你可以繼續(xù)前進(jìn)并肯定會獲得更好的領(lǐng)地時，為什么要停留在一些奇怪的約會地帶呢?

Don't want to hear it? Fine.

不想聽嗎?很好。

Here's the answer you're looking for: "Hang in there, baby. He's not the loser everybody's telling you he is.

這就是你尋找的答案：堅持住，寶貝。他不是大家對你所言的失敗者。

If you wait and keep your mouth shut and call at exactly the right time and anticipate his moods and have no expectations about communication or your own sexual needs, you can have him!"

如果你等待，閉上你的嘴，在正確的時間打電話，預(yù)料他的情緒并對溝通或自己的性需求不抱期望，你可以擁有他!

But please don't be surprised when he dumps you or continues to drag you through a completely unsatisfying relationship.

但當(dāng)他甩掉你或繼續(xù)拖累你進(jìn)入一個完全不滿意的戀愛關(guān)系時，請別感到驚訝。

We've heard it and you're sick of it.

我們已經(jīng)有所聽聞，而且你對此十分厭惡。

That's probably why you're in possession of this audible book now.

這可能就是為什么你現(xiàn)在擁有這本有聲書的原因。

You know you deserve to have a great relationship. We agree.

你知道你值得一段美好的戀愛關(guān)系。我們都同意這一點。

Liz told you I was going to say it: Don't waste the pretty!

莉斯告訴你我要說：不要辜負(fù)紅顏!