他其實(shí)沒(méi)那么喜歡你 第13期:女人不需要策劃和謀劃

But guess what: My way? Has sucked. Hasn't workedat all.

但你知道么：我的方式已經(jīng)完蛋了，完全無(wú)效。

I've never had a successful relationship with a guy thatI've pursued.

我追求過(guò)的人從來(lái)沒(méi)有好結(jié)果。

I'm sure there are many stories out there to thecontrary.

我相信有很多相反的故事。

But for me, those guys end up getting back togetherwith their ex-girlfriend, needing to take some time forthemselves, or going out of town for business.

但對(duì)我來(lái)說(shuō)，那些最終和他們的前女友一起的人，需要花些時(shí)間在自己身上，或者離開(kāi)城市去做生意。

Usually it doesn't even get that far. They usually just don't ever return my phone call.

通常維持不了多久。他們甚至就是不回我的電話(huà)。

And let me tell you, that didn't make me feel very in control of anything.

讓我來(lái)告訴你，這并沒(méi)有讓我感到絕對(duì)的控制權(quán)。

Since I've been implementing Greg's handy-dandy “he's just not that into you” philosophy, I've beenfeeling surprisingly more powerful.

自從我開(kāi)始執(zhí)行格雷戈的神奇的“他其實(shí)沒(méi)那么喜歡你”的理念，我一直感到驚訝多于強(qiáng)大。

Because if the men are asking you out, if the men have to get your attention, then you, in fact, arethe one in control.

因?yàn)槿绻悄腥嗽诩s你出去，如果是男人想得到你的關(guān)注，那么事實(shí)上你處于控制地位。

There's no scheming and plotting.

不需要策劃和謀劃。

And there is something great about knowing that my only job is to be as happy as I can be aboutmy life, and feel as good as I can about myself, and to lead as full and eventful a life as I can, so thatit doesn't ever feel like I'm just waiting around for some guy to ask me out.

知道自己唯一的工作是盡可能的幸福生活讓人感覺(jué)很棒，我可以感受最好的自己，盡可能過(guò)著多彩的生活，那樣就不會(huì)覺(jué)得我只是在等待某個(gè)人約我出去了。

And most importantly, it's good for us all to remember that we don't need to scheme and plot andbeg to get someone to ask us out. We're fantastic.

最重要的是，這對(duì)我們都很好，我們都要記住，我們不需要計(jì)劃和陰謀，并乞求得到別人來(lái)要約我們出去。我們真是太棒了。

This is What It Should Look Like, by Greg

這就是事情本來(lái)的模樣，格雷格

One night I was drinking in a bar and flirting with the bartender. I asked for her number.

一天晚上，我在酒吧里喝酒，跟酒保調(diào)情。我向她要號(hào)碼。

She said, “I don't give out my phone number because guys rarely call me when they say they'regoing to.

她說(shuō)，“我不給男人我的電話(huà)號(hào)碼，因?yàn)樗麄冋f(shuō)會(huì)打電話(huà)給我事實(shí)上卻很少打。

My name is Lindsey Adams, and if you want to call me, find my phone number.”

我的名字是琳賽亞當(dāng)斯，如果你想打給我就去找我的電話(huà)號(hào)碼。”

Which I did—the very next day.

我第二天就這么做了。

Do you know how many Lindsey Adams there are in the phone book of a major city?

你知道一個(gè)大城市的電話(huà)簿上有多少個(gè)琳賽亞當(dāng)斯嗎?

Let's just say I talked to about eight or nine before I found mine.

我打了8、9個(gè)電話(huà)才找到那個(gè)對(duì)的。

An actor we work with met a girl while he was making a public appearance on an aircraft carrier.

和我們一起工作的一個(gè)演員在一艘航空母艦上做公開(kāi)露面時(shí)遇見(jiàn)了一個(gè)女孩。

He lost track of her in about ten minutes.

他在十分鐘左右失去了她的蹤跡。

And yet, because he was so smitten, he somehow managed to track her down in the army, andthey are now married.

然而，由于他完全被迷住了，他設(shè)法在軍隊(duì)里追蹤到她，現(xiàn)在他們結(jié)婚了。