So the rate of diffusion equals something
所以說 擴散率等于什么鬼
times the square root of...something...
乘以什么鬼的平方根
I give up.
我放棄了
Aw, so close.
就快了嘛
Shut up.
給姐閉嘴
Hey, don't worry. You'll get it.
別著急 你能學會的
You know, a lot of famous scientists are women.
其實很多著名的科學家都是女人
They're fat, though, right?
但都是肥婆 對吧
Come on, Alex. It's time for your cello lesson.
走吧 艾麗克斯 要去上大提琴課了
How's the tutoring going?
輔導得怎么樣了
Are you familiar with the term
你聽說過這么一句話嗎
throwing good money after bad?
賠了夫人又折兵
Are you familiar with the term
你聽說過這么一句話嗎
Dunphy, party of one?
鄧菲小姐 孤獨終老
- Because you will be. - Girls.
這就是你的下場-姑娘們
Haley's coming along really well, Mrs. Dunphy.
海莉其實學得不錯 鄧菲夫人
Good. Good.
很好 很好
Well, the key is to take a lot of little breaks
關(guān)鍵是你要時不時地歇一下
so you don't get frustrated and want to quit.
這樣你就不會郁悶得想要放棄了
Got it.
明白
I was talking to David.
我是在和戴維說
Come on, sweetie.
走吧 寶貝兒
I'm just saying -- she's never gonna get a job,
我只是說 她以后肯定找不到工作
and how do we know the right middle-eastern businessman
不過沒準她能傍上某個中東富豪
wouldn't treat her great?
對她很好呢
I left my shopping list inside.
我把購物清單落家了
For the record, we thought she could live with you.
告訴你 我們計劃讓她以后跟你蹭吃蹭喝
Like I'm gonna tell any of you where I live.
你們別指望能找得到我
Haley!
海莉
What?
怎么了
We only do this when I get one right.
我做對題以后才有得親呢
Momma should be here by now.
媽咪早該到了
I wonder what's keeping her.
不會出啥岔子了吧
Well, Cam, that depends. Did she take her jalopy
小卡 這就要看她是開那輛老破車來呢
or one of them new fancy flyin' machines?
還是開什么新式小灰機呢
You know, Missouri is more cosmopolitan
呸 人家密蘇里州
than you give it credit for, Mitchell.
比你說的要現(xiàn)代化得多 米奇爾
It's got a very vibrant cowboy-poetry scene.
充滿了活靈活現(xiàn)的牛仔田園風情
I'm not sure you're making the point that you think --
你上下兩句話都不是同一個意思誒
That's her. Come on. Look alive. Look alive.
她來了 過來 熱情點 熱情點
Momma!
媽咪
Oh, my baby!
小心肝寶貝兒
Oh, my little bomber. Puppy kiss.
親親小淘氣 過來香一個
Mitchell, get over here!
米奇爾 快過來啦
Aah, hey, Barb!
巴布 你好嗎
Oh, my baby's baby! How are you?
我寶貝的寶貝 你好嗎
Well, I don't want to overstate this,
不是我自吹自擂
but my mom is the greatest woman that ever lived.
不過我媽是世界上最棒的女人
Cam loves his mom.
小卡愛死他媽了
She raised 4 kids, 2 barns,
她一人養(yǎng)活了四個娃 倆農(nóng)場
and a whole lot of hell.
還有很多其它亂七八糟的
Well, that sounds like a country song.
聽著跟鄉(xiāng)村歌曲似的
And that song would be called
沒錯 歌名就是
The Greatest Woman that ever Lived.
世界上最棒的女人
Cam loves his mom.
小卡愛死他媽了
From the minute I met Barb,
從我第一次見到巴布起
she has been open and loving and -- and caring.
她就一直開明 熱情 并且體貼
Oh, I have missed these shoulders!
我想死你這對小肩膀了
If I had one complaint --
不過要是我有任何意見的話
and I do --
說起來我還真有個意見
it's the...inappropriate putting of her hands on my body.
那就是 她老對我動手動腳
Hey, Barb. I got you the cranberries you wanted for the stuffing.
巴布 我買了你做餡要用的小紅莓
Oh, bless your heart.
你太貼心啦
Let me get in there and help ya.
我來幫你吧
And a horsey bite.
捏捏更健康
This is how I like to cuddle.
我好喜歡這樣粘在一起哦
It's been -- it's been going on a long time.
這個現(xiàn)象已經(jīng) 已經(jīng)有些日子了
Jay, you want to go to the mall with me?
杰 陪我去逛商場吧
No, actually, my stomach's a little funny today.
不了 我今天胃有點不舒服
Oh, I am so sorry, papi.
這可不得了呀 小寶貝
Maybe we'll stop first at the crib store,
要不咱先買個嬰兒床
and you lay down, and I buy you a little dress, huh?
把你放進去 再配條小裙子 好不
Gloria thinks Americans are babies.
歌洛莉亞覺得我們美國人都很嬌氣
Well, in Colombia, we couldn't go running to the hospital
在俺們哥倫比亞 像是小感冒
for every little sniffle or dislocated shoulder.
或者肩膀脫臼什么的 根本用不著去醫(yī)院
Okay. Good.
好咧 搞定
5-6. I serve. Huh?
五比六 我發(fā)球 對吧
Jay, what are your symptoms?
杰 你都有什么癥狀
Nausea, bloating?
惡心 腹脹嗎
Manny, what did I say about getting off
曼尼 我不是跟你說
that crazy doctor website?
少上那個醫(yī)療網(wǎng)站嗎
I'm just worried about Jay.
我只是擔心杰
Stomach pains can mean a lot of things --
胃痛可能是多種疾病的征兆
intestinal blockage...
像是腸梗阻
Do you have a fever?
你發(fā)燒嗎
Stop it! Manny, he's fine.
夠了 曼尼 他好著呢
- Tell him you're fine. - I'm fine.
跟他說你好著呢-我好著呢
Okay, good. Get in the car.
很好 上車去吧
Uh, home fine, not mall fine.
在家沒事 逛街就得發(fā)病
Jay, you know what happens when I shop angry.
杰 你知道我生著氣去逛街的后果
I'll clear a space.
我會幫你挪出地兒來的
I'm not loving your color.
我看你臉色蠟黃
Go play.
一邊兒玩去
Don't be a hero.
別逞強哦
So, dumb guys go for dumb girls,
弱智男配弱智女
and smart guys go for dumb girls?
聰明男也要配弱智女嗎
What do the smart girls get?
那聰明女配誰
Cats mostly.
配貓吧
So, Haley, how long have I been paying this guy
海莉 我為你們倆的胡搞
to make out with you?
買單多久了
Uh, about a week.
大概一個禮拜了吧
First it was just to shut him up,
我一開始親他只是想讓他閉嘴
but now I'm starting to like him.
不過現(xiàn)在我真有點動心了
If you really like him, though,
你要是真喜歡他
you have to break up with Dylan.
就趕緊把迪蘭甩了
What? No!
什么 不要啊
Believe me --
相信我
and it's best for everybody if you just do it quickly.
早死早超生
I can't believe we're having this conversation.
真不敢相信你們居然這樣說
He's like part of the family.
他就像自家人一樣
Trust me -- it's the right thing to do.
相信我 這是百利而無一害
Just end it.
趕緊把他甩了吧
Okay, but be gentle.
好吧 但是要溫柔點
Boys are surprisingly sensitive at that age.
青春期的男孩都很敏感的
Water-polo-girl story.
又來了 水球女的故事
Yes, I'm gonna tell the water-polo-girl story,
沒錯 我就要講水球女的故事
cause it hurt!
因為人家真的很傷心
Okay, so I'm working in the principal's office.
那時候我在校長辦公室工作
She walks in,
她就那么走進來
hair all silver from the chlorine...
頭發(fā)因剛游完泳而閃閃發(fā)亮
tells me she wants her varsity jacket back.
她說她想把棒球外套拿回去
I tear up a little,
我一聽這個眼睛就濕了
then I tear up a lot.
接著嚎啕大哭
I'm begging, I'm begging --
我求她 求她不要這樣對我
at some point I realize
結(jié)果我突然發(fā)現(xiàn)
I'm sitting on the button
我屁股底下坐著的是
to the high-school intercom system.
全校廣播的開關(guān)
Yuk it up, ladies.
不許笑
Wasn't funny then, is not funny now.
從前不好笑 現(xiàn)在更不好笑
It was traumatic, Haley.
那完全就是杯具啊 海莉
Don't do Dylan like Linda "the cannon" Concannon did me.
不要像"大炮"琳達對我那樣對待迪蘭
Oh, honey...
親愛的
that was a long time ago.
都過去那么久了
I loved her.
我真的愛過她
Okay. I know.
好吧 我知道了
You know what?
你知道嗎
Maybe I'll call Dylan after he talks to Haley.
也許海莉跟迪蘭分手以后 我可以打給他聊聊
He's gonna need someone to lean on.
他肯定需要找個人來依靠一下
But that someone should not be his ex-girlfriend's father.
但那個人不該是他前女友的老爸
Honey, when Dylan is out of her life,
親愛的 迪蘭跟海莉分手以后
he should be out of ours.
就應該跟咱們都分手
You've always hated Dylan.
你一向討厭迪蘭
I have not always hated Dylan.
我沒有一向討厭迪蘭
I have always thought that Haley could do better.
我只是一向認為海莉可以找個更好的
Plus, the new boyfriend is so smart.
再說 這個新男友超聰明呢
It's done. We broke up.
搞掂了 我們分手了
What?!
什么
I texted Dylan. It's over.
我發(fā)了短信給迪蘭 分了
I'll bet that's him.
肯定是他
Sad-face emoticon!
哭喪著臉的表情
?
You can feel the hurt through the phone!
透過電話都知道他有多傷心
Cam's mom's been half of the dinner with her hands
吃晚餐時 小卡的媽媽有一半的時間
all over me.
都在對我上下其手
It was like she was blind
就好像她是個瞎子
and wanted to know what my thighs looked like.
然后想知道我的大腿長什么樣
Are you sure?
你確定嗎
I mean, are you really the best judge of this kind of a thing?
你對這種事情真的有評論權(quán)嗎
You've had boundary issues since you were a kid.
你從小就對界限模糊
I have not!
我才沒有
Okay. Sorry. My mistake.
好吧 對不起 是我的錯
Must be Cam's mom...her issues.
肯定是小卡母親的錯 是她有問題
What are you doing?
你在干嗎
- Nothing -- just getting a spoon. - Stop it.
-沒干嗎 拿個勺子而已 -別這樣
- Is it bothering you? - Yes, it is.
你覺得不舒服嗎-是的
- Hey, Mitchell - Claire, stop it! Stop it!
-嘿 米奇爾 -克萊爾 別這樣
- Mitchell, Mitchell, Mitchell, Mitchell -- - Force field!
-米奇爾 米奇爾 米奇爾 -別逼我
That never stops being fun.
還是那么好玩
Good.
很好
Listen, this is -- this is not in my head, Claire.
聽好了 這不是我瞎想的 克萊爾
And it's actually getting worse.
而且她愈演愈烈了
What does Cam say?
小卡怎么說
Well, he never seems to notice.
他根本就沒注意到
And I certainly can't talk to him about it
而我肯定不能告訴他
because God forbid I say anything negative about his mom.
因為我絕對不能說他媽壞話
One time I added salt to her casserole...
有一次我在她的砂鍋燉肉里加了鹽
...and he went into the garage and punched the car.
結(jié)果他沖進車庫砸了我的車
Okay, Mitchell, if this is happening --
好吧 米奇爾 如果這一切是真的
and I'm pretty sure it isn't --
雖然我很確定這是你的幻覺
Thank you. Supportive.
謝謝 你還真是挺我呀
then you need Cam to see his mom feeling you up
那么你就要讓小卡看到他媽媽摸你
and then make Cam deal with it.
然后交給他去處理
Think about it.
好好想想吧
Hi, Dylan.
迪蘭
Hey, Mrs. Dunphy.
鄧菲太太
Or, I guess, now that Haley and I broke up,
不過現(xiàn)在我跟海莉分手了
I should call you "Claire".
我想我該叫你"克萊爾"
Actually, I think we're gonna stick with "Mrs. Dunphy".
還是繼續(xù)叫我鄧菲太太吧
Come on in. How are you doing?
進來吧 你還好嗎
Not so good.
不怎么樣
I mean, everywhere I look, I see her face.
我不管去哪 都能見到她的臉
To be fair, Dylan, that is a family portrait.
那是呀 迪蘭 你看的是我們的全家福
I got to go get some of my stuff. Is that cool?
我要上去拿我的東西 可以嗎
Oh, sure. Yeah.
當然 去吧
There she is again!
又是她
Oh, don't look on the bookshelf!
別往書架上看
You're just gonna...
那會讓你
Hey, kid, you got a minute?
小子 有時間嗎
I need the name of that medical website.
我要那個醫(yī)學網(wǎng)站的網(wǎng)址
Can this wait until I'm home?
不能等我回家再說嗎
I'm having the round of my life.
我正贏得爽著呢
I've been thinking, I might have a couple of those, uh,
我一直在想 我可能有一點
those symptoms you were talking about.
你之前說的那些癥狀
I see.
知道了
You might as well play through.
別等我了 你繼續(xù)打吧
It's gonna be a while.
我還要耽擱一會呢
I mean, I'm probably wrong,
我可能是多想了
but, you know, I just, uh, want to make sure.
但是我只是想確認一下
- Is that Manny? - Work.
是曼尼嗎-是工作電話
So, uh, tell them I'll --
那么 告訴他們
I'll get that order out this afternoon, huh?
我今天下午就發(fā)貨 好嗎
Did she buy that?
她信了嗎
Because it sounded fake on this end.
因為就連我聽起來都覺得有點假
I'll talk to you later, Tom.
晚點聊 湯姆
Tom.
是湯姆
Dylan!
迪蘭
Oh, Dylan, Dylan, Dylan, Dylan.
迪蘭 迪蘭 迪蘭 迪蘭
Hey, Mr. Dunphy.
鄧菲先生
Hey, now that you guys are broken up,
你們倆現(xiàn)在既然分手了
you can call me whatever you want.
你隨便怎么叫我都行
Phil, Vitamin P., P. Daddy.
菲爾 維他命菲 菲老爸 都行
Okay, Phil.
好吧 菲爾
Okay.
好的
I'm gonna miss that bad boy.
我會想念這個臭小子的
When I forget my own axe,
有時候我手癢癢了
sometimes I come in here and noodle on it.
就進來撥弄一下它
Actually, I've been writing a little song of my own.
實際上 我最近也在寫首歌呢
Might be able to pluck out a few...
也許我可以給你彈
You know, I keep on hoping that this is just a dream,
我一直希望這一切只是個夢
that Haley and I didn't really break up.
海莉其實沒有跟我分手
But it's not a dream...
但這不是夢
unless the whole thing was a dream
除非整件事都是個夢
and we never even dated in the first place.
我們從一開始就沒在一起過
Weird -- this is kind of what my song's about.
真奇怪 這跟我寫的歌差不多
Yeah. Weird.
是啊 真奇怪
I know this is tough, but you're gonna be fine.
我知道這不好受 但是你會好起來的
You know, I was a lot like you in high school...
我高中的時候跟你很像
except my hair was shorter
除了我的頭發(fā)短點
and my guitar was a flute.
我玩的不是吉他而是長笛
Well, if you want your own guitar,
如果你想要把吉他
I mean, we could --
咱倆可以
We could go out and we'd pick you one.
咱倆可以一塊去買
Oh, I don't -- I don't know if that's such a good idea.
我不 這樣好像不太好
Yeah. Totally.
沒錯
Well
那么
I guess I'll get going.
我看我還是走吧
So...
這樣一來
I can...well, be alone forever.
我就能 孤獨終老了
Uh, what -- what the hell?
管它的呢
Let's go guitar shopping.
咱倆去買吉他吧
Awesome.
棒極了
Uh, do me a favor. Don't -- don't tell Mrs. Dunphy?
答應我件事 別 別告訴鄧菲太太好嗎
Yeah. Definitely. You got it.
那是一定的 沒問題
Okay. All right.
好的 很好
Well, I guess I'll see ya.
那回頭見
Okay. You --
好的 你
you, uh, you can go ahead and exit
你可以直接
through the...front door.
從 正門出去的
Oh, right. Habit.
對哦 我都習慣了
My old yearbook!
我的舊年鑒
You know I saved them all.
你知道我把它們都存下來了
- Oh, look. - What?
看呀-是什么
You're the cutest boy in school.
你是全校最可愛的男生
263
00:09:52,060 --> 00:09:53,710
You're gonna have an awesome summer.
你將擁有一個美妙絕倫的夏天
264
00:09:53,720 --> 00:09:56,030
Smooches -- Brenda.
親親 布蘭達
Oh, Brenda, you are about to have
可憐的布蘭達 你將擁有一個
the most confusing summer of your life.
史上最郁悶的夏天
Hey, guys!
大家好
Oh, there's Mitchell!
米奇爾回來了
My little corn silk!
我的小親親
Oh, Barb, oh, you are such a good hugger.
巴布 你的擁抱真帶勁
Isn't she the best hugger?
她的擁抱是最帶勁的不是嗎
Oh, thank you.
謝謝
Oh, and look what I -- I got you, Barb.
看看我給你帶了什么 巴布
What's that?
是什么
Scratchers!
是刮獎彩票
Mmm...-Thank you.
親親-謝啦
Nice.
真不錯
Oh, that's your tea. I'm gonna get your tea.
你的茶好了 我去給你沏
Thanks, honey.
謝謝親愛的
Well, I need a quarter.
我需要個硬幣
Oh. Let me have that.
我來找找看
Oh, wow, yeah, feel free to fish around in there.
好吧 請隨便摸
Cam? Cam.
小卡 小卡
I'd like a cup, too, please.
也給我來一杯 謝謝
Just a second.
馬上就好
Ohh, Barb, ohh. You know what?
巴布 我跟你講
I-I-I strained myself so bad today.
我 我今天扭傷了
Well, what's hurtin' on ya?
哪里疼
It's this area between my, uh, lower back
就在 后背下面
and upper thigh.
大腿上面這塊
Sounds like your fanny.
聽起來像是屁股
It's my fanny.
對 就是屁股
It's really knotted up.
疼得不得了
Well, you need someone to work on that.
你得找個醫(yī)生看看
Ohh, I would love that. Just -- it's really seized up.
我倒是想 只是我疼得走不動了
Just put your fingers all over my...
我只要你來捏捏
my fanny.
我的屁股就好了
Your magic fingers...Barb.
用你的回春之手 巴布
Momma? Your tea.
老媽 你的茶好了
Mitchell?-Thanks,sweetie.
米奇爾-謝謝 寶貝
See you in the room for a minute?
能否借一步說話
Thank you. It's very hot.
謝謝 茶還很燙
?
- Don't burn your tongue. - All right, honey.
別燙著舌頭-好的 親愛的
Okay, I am not gonna cry,
好吧 我不會哭
but I want to know why, Mitchell,
但是我想知道為什么 米奇爾
Why you are presenting to my mother like a baboon.
你為什么在我媽面前表現(xiàn)得跟只狒狒一樣
I wanted you to see her fondling me.
我想讓你看看她是怎么摸我的
So, you do want me to cry.
看來你就是承心要弄哭我
No, no, Cam, it's just that...
不 不 小卡 只是
she's always touching me inappropriately,
她總是對我動手動腳
and you never seem to notice.
而你似乎從來沒有注意到
Show me, Mitchell.
做給我看 米奇爾
Show me on Lily's doll where my mother is touching you.
用莉莉的娃娃做給我看 我媽摸你哪了
I know that you don't want to hear this, but she's handsy,
我知道你不愛聽 但是她確實動手動腳
and it makes me uncomfortable.
讓我覺得很不自在
Oh, my god. I know what this is.
天啊 我知道這是怎么回事了
You're just not used to having a mother that shows affection.
我媽太關(guān)心你了 你一時適應不了
Oh, do not make this about my mother.
別又把我媽扯進來
I didn't.
我沒有
But it is normal for a mother to be physical.
但是跟母親的肢體接觸是難免的
And it is not strange
偶爾的擁抱或者
for an occasional hug or a little pat on tanny.
拍拍屁股是很正常的
Okay, these aren't pats, Cam -- no.
她不只是拍 小卡 根本不是
She squeezes and lingers!
她一直揪來揪去不放手
Show me where she squeezes and lingers.
跟我示范下她怎么揪來揪去不放手了
Cam, put the doll down.
小卡 把娃娃放下
I don't know if this is just sexual or -- or crazy town,
我不知道她是開放還是瘋掉了
but your mother cannot keep her hands off of me,
但是她老是對我下咸豬手
and it's creeping me out
我已經(jīng)受不了了
No.
不
Barb...
巴布
Let me show you
我給你示范
where you stabbed my momma.
你在哪捅了我媽一刀
Thanks for helping me pick out my axe.
謝謝你幫我挑吉他
You were so right, by the way.
還有你說得對
The one with two necks would have been overkill.
雙頸吉他的確是太過了
If you want, you can have some of that.
你想吃就吃吧
Diet starts tomorrow!
明天開始節(jié)食
Don't tell Mrs. Dunphy about this, either.
這也不能告訴鄧菲太太哦
I, uh, I always wanted to go to this place with Haley,
我 一直想跟海莉來這里
but she said it looked stupid.
但是她覺得很傻
She's a girl with strong opinions --
她為人太主觀了
like her mother.
跟她媽媽一樣
Claire hates this new sweatshirt I bought.
克萊爾總是對我買的這件運動衫指指點點
She says it looks like something
她說這看上去像是
a girl would wear to the beach.
女生去沙灘時穿的衣服
Yeah, it does.
確實很像
But I wear it anyway.
但我還是穿了
See?
明白我的意思嗎
I figure, why be alive if you can't do the things
我覺得吧 一個人要是不能做喜歡的事
you're passionate about?
活著還有啥意思
What are you passionate about, Dylan?
那么你熱衷于什么呢 迪蘭
格雷斯蘭 貓王宅邸 位于田納西州的孟菲斯
Uh, I always wanted to drive to Graceland.
額 我一直想開車去格雷斯蘭
Fun! What else?
不錯 還有呢
I know a guy who can get me a pet bobcat.
我認識一個人能給我搞到一只美洲山貓
Yeah! No, you don't really know what they're gonna do.
不行 你根本不知道它們多厲害
The point is, you got your whole life ahead of you.
重點是 你人生道路還長著呢
Enjoy being single.
享受單身吧
I really got to play that song for you.
我覺得我應該給你彈一下這首歌
This is all in there.
我突然來感覺了
Yeah.
好啊
Awesome. Be right back.
酷斃了 我馬上回來
Hey, hey, come here.
嘿 你 過來
Is that guy over there with someone?
那邊那家伙是跟別人一起來的嗎
Could you tell if there was anything going on between them?
你知道他們在搞什么嗎
I don'know.
不知道
They were talking about taking a trip to Graceland together.
好像在說一起去格雷斯蘭什么的
He just wants to go
他想去是因為
cause he thinks it's an amusement park!
他覺得那是一個游樂園
I got to tell you,
我得跟你說
你這癥狀越來越像憩室炎了
this is looking more and more like diverticulitis.
憩室 消化道粘膜向管壁外突出的局限性袋形擴張或囊樣突出
Do they say how to treat it?
有沒有說如何治療
Like a heating pad or -- ohh -- there it is again.
像是用電熱毯或者 又疼了
Well, describe the pain.
說說你是怎么個疼法
It's like I'm being stabbed,
就像被捅了一刀
but also like I ate a bad scallop
但又像是被我吃掉的扇貝
that's stabbing me from the inside.
從里面捅了我一刀一樣
That's colorful, but there's no box for that.
很形象 但網(wǎng)站上沒這些選項
What are you guys looking at?
你們爺倆干啥捏
看美女-赫芬頓郵報 美女
- Girls! - Huffington post...girls.
赫芬頓郵報 美國最著名的政治博客
Manny, let me see that screen.
曼尼 讓老娘看看
What did I tell you?
我不是叫你不要上這個網(wǎng)站的嗎
It's not his fault. I asked him to look.
不是他的錯 是我讓他看的
I'm starting to think I have a serious problem here.
我開始覺得我的病嚴重起來了
Yes, you do! That computer!
沒錯 就是這破電腦惹的禍
You read it there, you think it here,
你看了網(wǎng)頁 就開始想入非非
you feel it here.
然后就無病呻吟
You want to feel better?
你想好受點嗎
There -- you're cured.
好了 你痊愈了
Give me 15 minutes,
幫我爭取15分鐘時間
弗羅倫斯·南丁格爾 近代護理事業(yè)的創(chuàng)始人 5.12護士節(jié)就是為了紀念她 這里是挖苦歌洛莉亞
then tell Florence Nightingale I went to the hospital.
弗羅倫斯·南丁格爾女士要是問起來就說我去醫(yī)院了
I'm gonna kill her! I'm gonna kill him!
我要殺了她 我還要殺了他
I'm gonna kill both of them!
我要殺了這對狗男女
What happened?
怎么了
Dylan has a new girlfriend!
迪蘭找了個新女友
When did that happen?
什么時候
Who cares?
管他呢
I'm just surprised he didn't say anything...
他什么都沒跟你說么
to you.
奇怪了
He's not answering my texts.
他也不回我短信
How could he do this to me?!
他怎么能這么對我
Oh, honey, you were the one who broke up with him.
親愛的 是你把他甩了的
I didn't think he was gonna find someone so fast!
我沒想到他那么快又找了一個
Maybe he's better than I thought.
可能他比我想的要好
No, he's not. What? No, he's not better!
不 不會 絕對不會
No, you know who's better?
知道誰更好么
David -- David the tutor.
戴維 家教哥戴維
Smart, smart David?
聰明的戴維
Maybe that's him right now!
可能是他來了
Do you want the house to yourself?
想跟他單獨相處嗎
For just a little while.
就一會兒
I got your texts.
我收到你的短信了
You swore a lot.
你罵得還真狠
Who is she?
她是誰
Who is who?
誰是誰
Your new girlfriend.
你的新女友
I need her name and address, so I can mess her up.
我要她的名字和地址 好去找她算賬
I don't have a new girlfriend.
我哪有新女友了
Don't play dumb, Dylan.
別裝傻了 迪蘭
I'm not. I'm never playing dumb!
我沒有 我從來不裝傻
I saw you at that stupid restaurant,
我在那個傻逼餐廳看到你了
sharing a sundae with her ugly sweatshirt on the chair.
你跟她椅子上的惡心運動衫同吃一個圣代
Oh, is that the skank?
是那個賤人嗎
No...no, there's -- there's no skank.
不不 沒有 沒有什么蕩婦
Well, then why aren't yo answering it?
那你為什么不接電話
Cause I want to talk to you.
因為我想跟你談談
Well, I want to talk to her.
我倒是想跟她談談
I'm gonna call her back
我要給她打回去
and tell her to keep her hands off
讓她把她的爪子從屬于
of what belongs to me.
我的東西上拿開
Haley...-Hello.
海莉-喂
Dad?-Haley?
爸-海莉
Oh...my...god -- the sweatshirt?
我的天 那件運動衫
That was you with Dylan?!
跟迪蘭在一起的人是你嗎
Wait, you're the other girl?
等一下 你就是那個新女友嗎
No, we're just friends!
不 我們只是朋友
Phil, what are you --
菲爾 你搞什么
Okay, put the phone down.
好了 把電話掛了
what is going on?
到底是怎么回事
He needed someone to talk to.
他需要一個可以傾訴的人
He took the break-up pretty hard.
他的心都快碎了
- But -- - You did?
但是-真的嗎
I mean, I kept on hoping that we'd get back together.
我一直希望我們能重歸于好
Thinking of you with someone else just drove me crazy.
一想到你跟別人在一起我都快瘋了
Me too, baby.
我也是 寶貝
But then your da helped me figure out
但是你爸幫我認識到
maybe it's best if we're apart.
也許分開才是最好的選擇
Nice.
好樣的
I mean, I think I just need
我只是覺得
a little time to date...Dylan.
我需要一點時間去跟迪蘭約會
?
And I mean me, not another guy named Dylan.
是說我自己啦 不是另一個叫迪蘭的人
So, we're still broken up?
所以 我們還是要分手嗎
Yeah, I think so.
是的 我想是的
Wow. Okay...um...I don't know -- I'll see you.
好吧 那就 再見吧
Bye.
再見
Are you okay, baby?
你沒事吧 寶貝
Do you need another pillow?
還要墊多個枕頭嗎
I know you think this is nothing,
我知道你覺得我沒事
but he did say it could be an ulcer.
但醫(yī)生的確說有可能是潰瘍
He also said it could be gas.
他還說有可能是脹氣
Do you want me to burp you? Come here. Come here.
你想讓我?guī)湍闩呐谋硢?過來 過來
Dollars to doughnuts, it's diverticulitis.
十有八九是憩室炎
Actually, it's not.
不是憩室炎
You have acute pendicitis.
你得了急性闌尾炎
We need to get you into surgery right away.
我們要馬上給你動手術(shù)
Emergency surgery. I told you it was something.
緊急手術(shù) 我跟你說了不是小毛病
That can't be right. You have to check again!
不可能 你得再復查一下
The tests are conclusive.
已經(jīng)確診了
Everything will be all right, Mr. Pritchett.
一切都會沒事的 普里契特先生
Let's go.
咱們走吧
No, jay, if that's true,
不 杰 如果是真的話
yhen I'm the worst wife in the whole wide world!
那我就是全世界最惡毒的老婆了
I made you suffer for two whole days!
我讓你忍了整整兩天
Honey, it's okay.
親愛的 沒事的
No, it's not okay!
不 怎么會沒事
Why?! Why do I always almost kill my husbands?!
為什么 為什么我總是差點害死我老公
And I want to hear this story sometime,
我找時間再聽這個故事吧
but I'm sort of counting down to a rupture here!
但我現(xiàn)在要準備割闌尾了
No!! You can't go without forgiving me!
不 你不能帶著對我的怨恨離開
What if you die in there?
你要是死在手術(shù)室里了怎么辦
What do I do without you?!
沒有你我該怎么辦
I forgive you,
我原諒你了
but nobody dies of an appendectomy!
但是沒人會死于闌尾炎手術(shù)
True, it's usually the anesthesia that gets you.
沒錯 通常都是麻醉出問題
You're over 60, right?
你六十多歲了 對吧
I will never forget you, Jay!!
我永遠不會忘了你的 杰
Could you go back to not caring, please?!
你還是保持鐵石心腸吧 拜托
Mitchell, it's Barb.
米奇爾 我是巴布
Ohh, Barb. I'm so sorry.
巴布 我很抱歉
Well, no, no, honey, you hush.
不不 親愛的 聽我說
Look, I...
聽著 我
I've been thinking about what I heard, and...
我一直在想關(guān)于我聽到的
maybe I do touch you too much.
也許我是摸你摸得的有點過分了
And I could say it's 'cause we're a family,
我想說我這么做是因為咱們是一家人
but, you know, I don't know.
但是 事實上 我不確定
I guess I have been having some fun with you,
我猜我跟你在一起很開心
and I...I thought that it was harmless,
我 我以為摸兩把沒事的
but I would never want to make you uncomfortable.
但是我從來沒想讓你覺得不舒服
Barb, it's my fault, too.
巴布 這也是我的錯
So we're okay?
那我們和好了嗎
Yes, yes, of course.
是的 是的 當然了
Thank god.
謝天謝地
Cause I couldn't live with myself
因為如果咱倆之間有芥蒂的話
if things stayed weird between us.
我會難受死的
- Uh, Cam? Cam? - What is it?
-小卡 小卡 -怎么了
Well, we got it all worked out, sweetie!
我們已經(jīng)和好了 寶貝
Oh, great. Let me get my camera!
太好了 我去拿相機
Okay, that's not necessary -- no!
沒必要吧 不要
From now on, if I go too far,
從現(xiàn)在開始 如果我做得過分了
- please, you just tell me about it. - Okay.
拜托你直接告訴我-好的
What is that? Oh -- ohh!
那是什么
Almost lost my bracelet.
差點把手鐲丟了
- That would be an area that's okay. - No!
掉在那還好-不
- Oh, dang it! - I'll get it. I'll get it.
要命-我來撿 我來撿
Oh, no, I saw where it fell.
沒事 我看見它掉在哪兒了
Force field! Force field!
別逼我 別逼我
What's going on?
怎么回事
- I lost my bracelet in here. - Momma!
我把手鐲掉進去了-媽咪
Listen, I think this might be one of those situations
聽著 我想這種就是米奇爾
where Mitchell feels like you're crossing a boundary.
覺得你做的過分的情形之一
Really?
是嗎
Like, this too?
就像 這樣也算嗎
Well...I...I got to have a good long think
那么 我要好好想一想
about how I conduct myself.
我的行為舉止問題了
I'm truly sorry, Mitchell.
我真的很抱歉 米奇爾
It's okay! It's okay.
沒事 沒事
Well, let's take one quick picture,
那咱們趕緊照張相
- and we'll get out of his way. - Yeah. Absolutely.
然后我們就出去-好的
- Scooch together there. - This all right?
靠近一點-這樣行嗎
Okay.
好啦
I miss him.
我想他
He was your first real boyfriend.
他是你第一個真正意義上的男朋友
I keep expecting him to show up.
我一直希望他能出現(xiàn)
He used to come by at night,
他以前都是晚上過來
and I'd sneak out to see him.
然后我偷偷溜去跟他見面
- Yeah, I know. - You knew?
-是 我知道 -你知道嗎
His car is 30 years old and doesn't have a muffler.
他開一輛沒有消音器的三十年前的舊車
And he honked.
他居然還按喇叭
I loved that car.
我超愛那臺車
I rode in it to the guitar store.
我坐著它去吉他店
I felt like I was flying.
感覺自己快飛起來了
I know it hurts now, sweetheart, but...
我知道你現(xiàn)在很難過 寶貝 但是
that's how you know it was a relationship worth having.
這樣你才明白這段感情是值得擁有的
Thanks, dad.
謝謝 爸
So Dylan, you love the Graceland?
迪蘭 貓王家好玩嗎
Yeah, that's true.
是的 沒錯
Probably would be cooler if they had roller coasters.
如果他們有過山車就更酷了
Still, it's fun to see where the king lived, huh?
不過 能看到國王住的地方還是很有趣對吧
No. No, no, no.
不 不 不 不
That's just an expression. America doesn't have a king.
那只是一個比喻 美國沒有國王
Yeah. Oh, sure. Uh-huh. When?
是啊 好呀 什么時候
Well, that's not always the case.
并不總是那樣的
So, Dylan, did you get a chance
迪蘭 你有機會
to listen to that song I sent you?
聽我發(fā)給你的歌嗎
No? You got seven minutes?
沒有嗎 你有七分鐘時間嗎